Isikhathi Sokudedela Ubudlelwano Bebanga Elide

Umlobi: Laura McKinney
Usuku Lokudalwa: 1 Epreli 2021
Ukuvuselela Usuku: 1 Ujulayi 2024
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-Delile

Ukude ebudlelwaneni kungaba nzima. Ngaphandle kokuthintana ngokomzimba nesikhathi esichithwa ndawonye, ​​kungaba yinselele ukwakha ukusondelana nokugcina isibopho esiqinile. Ngaphandle kwalezi zinselelo, abantu abaningi bangahlala bezibophezele ebudlelwaneni bebanga elide, benethemba lokuhlala noma ukusondelana nomlingani wabo esikhathini esizayo.

Uma uke waba nebanga ebuhlotsheni isikhashana, ungahle uzibuze ukuthi ubuyeke nini ubudlelwano bebanga elide. Ungahle uthande ukubambelela ebudlelwaneni, ukholwa ukuthi wena nomlingani wakho nizobumbana ngesikhathi esithile.

Kungenzeka futhi ukuthi ekugcineni ungazizwa sengathi uchitha isikhathi sakho ebuhlotsheni obungayi ndawo.

Ukusula ukudideka, funda ukuze ufunde izimpawu eziyi-15 zokuthi ubuyeke nini ubudlelwano bebanga elide.


Ingabe ibanga lonakalisa ubuhlobo?

Ibanga, ngeshwa, lingonakalisa ubuhlobo obuthile. Ozakwethu badinga isikhathi somzimba ndawonye, ​​ikakhulukazi uma umlingani oyedwa enesidingo esikhulu sothando lomzimba. Uma ubudlelwano bungahlangabezani nezidingo zomunye noma bobabili abalingani, bangehluleka ngokushesha.

Umuntu olwazisa uthando lomzimba angaze azizwe engathandwa uma kukhona kude ebudlelwaneni.

Ayini amaphesenti obudlelwano behluleka kude nebanga?

Ngenkathi ukugcina izinto ngaphezu kwebanga elide kunzima futhi kungaholela ekwehlulekeni kobudlelwano, akubona bonke ubuhlobo bebanga elide obuzophela.

Eqinisweni, ngokwe- New York Post, ucwaningo lwakamuva luthole ukuthi amaphesenti angama-60 obudlelwano bebanga elide ayaphumelela. Ngenkathi umaki wezinyanga ezine ubuyiphuzu eliyinselele kakhulu emibhangqwaneni ekucwaningweni, labo abenze uphawu lwezinyanga eziyisishiyagalombili ebudlelwaneni bebanga elide bebesethubeni lokuphumelela.

Ngokuya ngalolu cwaningo, ebelibandakanya ababambiqhaza abayi-1 000, cishe amaphesenti angama-40 obudlelwano obunjalo aholela ekuhlukaneni.


Kungani ubudlelwane bebanga elide buhluleka?

Njengoba kushiwo ngenhla, amabanga angagcina onakalise ubudlelwano ngenxa yezici ezahlukahlukene. Ake sizibheke ngokuningiliziwe:

  • Ukuntuleka kocansi

I- ukuntuleka kocansi lapho kunebanga ebudlelwaneni nakho kungaba yinselele. Lapho izithandani zingasondelani, kulula ukuthi inhlansi ife.

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  • Ukuntuleka kokuxhumana komphakathi nezothando

Ibanga nalo lingabulala ubuhlobo ngenxa ye- ukuntuleka kokuxhumana komphakathi nezothando. Abantu ngokwemvelo bangabantu bezenhlalo, futhi izingcingo nezingxoxo zevidiyo kwesinye isikhathi azikwazi ukuthatha indawo yokuxhumana ubuso nobuso. Kunzima nokwakha ezothando ngezingxoxo zefoni noma zevidiyo.


  • Izinkinga zokuthembela

Ekugcineni, ngisho nocwaningo lukhombisa lokho ibanga lingadala izingqinamba zokwethemba. Uma kunokungavikeleki ebudlelwaneni, omunye noma bobabili abalingani bangangabaza ukuthi omunye uthembekile phakathi kwezingcingo.

Omunye ophathina naye angabona ukuthi bajabula kakhulu uma bekude nomunye, ekugcineni kuholele ekuweni kobudlelwano lapho kukhona ibanga.

Ukuqhelelana ebudlelwaneni nakho kungadala ukuthi abantu bahlukane futhi babone ukuthi bajabule ngokwengeziwe ngaphandle komunye nomunye. Oyedwa noma bobabili abalingani bangalingeka ukuba bafune ukuxhumana kwezothando noma kocansi nomuntu osondelene nekhaya.

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  • Ukungabi namandla

Ngaphezu kwalokho, ubudlelwano bebanga elide buyahluleka lapho eyodwa noma bobabili ophathina bayeke ukubeka imizamo ebudlelwaneni.

Isibonelo, ungayeka ukushaya ucingo njalo kumlingani wakho, noma uthole ukuthi nixoxa kaninginingi ngevidiyo noma nihambela ukubonana kaningi ngezimpelasonto. Lesi simo ngokuqondakalayo singaholela ekwehlulekeni kobudlelwano.

  • Izinhloso zesikhathi esizayo azihambelani

Kungaba nzima futhi nokufuna ukufaka umzamo odingekayo ukuze kube nobudlelwano bebanga elide, ikakhulukazi uma ufinyelela ezinhlosweni zakho futhi izinhlelo zesikhathi esizayo azihambelani.

Isibonelo, enye yezinkinga ngobudlelwano bebanga elide ukuthi ilungu elilodwa lobambiswano lingafisa ukuhlala ndawonye esikhathini esizayo esiseduze, kanti omunye umlingani akanazo izinhlelo zokuba ndawonye. Kungakhathaza ukufaka umzamo ebudlelwaneni obungabonakali buholela ekusasazweni elihlanganyelwe.

Kunini lapho kufanele uyeke khona ebudlelwaneni bebanga elide

Yize ubudlelwano obunjalo bungaphumelela uma womabili amalungu obambiswano enza imizamo yokubenza basebenze, kunezikhathi lapho bengaphumeleli khona, futhi udinga ukwazi ukuthi ubuyeke nini ubudlelwano bebanga elide.

Kunezimpawu ezithile, ezibalwe ngezansi, ezingasikisela ukuthi sekuyisikhathi sokuyeka ubuhlobo obude.

Izimpawu okudingeka uzidedele zobudlelwano bebanga elide

Okulandelayo kungasiza uma uzibuza ukuthi ungabuyeka nini ubudlelwano bebanga elide:

1. Alukho uthando

Uyabona ukuthi ezothando sezihambile phakathi kwakho nomlingani wakho. Isibonelo, awusathokozi lapho uthola umbhalo ovela kokunye kwakho okuphawulekayo, noma inhliziyo yakho ayisashukhi lapho ubabona ku-FaceTime ngesikhathi socingo lwevidiyo.

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2. Ukusola njalo

Uzithola uhlala uzizwa usola ngokwenziwa ngumlingani wakho uma ningekho ocingweni nonke.

Uma uthola ukuthi awukwazi ukunqoba lezi zinsolo ngisho nangemva kokuxoxa ngazo kaninginingi nomlingani wakho, noma unobufakazi bokuthi umlingani wakho kungenzeka ukuthi uhlanganyela ekuziphatheni kokungathembeki, mhlawumbe isikhathi sokuqhubeka.

Kungokwemvelo ukuba nokusola ebudlelwaneni bebanga elide, kepha uma buqala ukukudla, ubudlelwano abusenampilo kuwe noma udinga ukubhekisisa imicabango yakho.

3. Ukuntuleka kokuxhumana

Akukho ukuxhumana phakathi kwenu nobabili. Ungahle ubone ukuthi awunalutho ongakhuluma ngalo nomlingani wakho webanga elide, noma ungathola ukuthi ukubabiza noma ukuxoxa ngevidiyo nabo sekuwumsebenzi.

Ungase futhi uhambe izinsuku ezimbalwa ungakhulumanga, futhi lapho ekugcineni ushayela umlingani wakho ukuthula, ngakolunye uhlangothi lwentambo.

Ukuxhumana okuhle nakho kungasekelwa ngokubuza imibuzo. Bheka incwadi ethi 401 Great Discussion Questions For Couples In Long Distance Relationships ebhalwe ngu-Psychologist nomlobi uLisa McKay ukwakha ukusondelana okungcono uma ufuna ukunika ubuhlobo elinye ithuba.

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Futhi bukela isikhulumi esikhuthazayo uJay Shetty ekhuluma ngamathiphu ama-5 aqinisekisiwe azokwenza umehluko ebudlelwaneni bakho:

4. Izinguquko eziningi kakhulu

Wena nomaqondana wakho nishintshile ngezindlela ezenza ukuthi nihlukane nobabili. Ukuthuthela edolobheni elisha noma ukuhlala kude nothile kungadala ukuthi oyedwa noma bobabili abalingani bashintshe.

Uma uthola ukuthi wena kanye / noma umlingani wakho nishintshile selokhu nahlukana, kungenzeka ningabe nisasebenzisana. Uma izinguquko zibalulekile, kungaba yisikhathi sokudedela ubudlelwano bebanga elide.

5. Ayikho imizamo

Ukuqhelelana ebudlelwaneni kungenza kube nzima ukuhlala ndawonye, ​​ngakho bobabili abalingani kufanele bazame ukwenza izinto zisebenze. Uma uzwa ukuthi umlingani wakho akasazami noma ukukwenza ubaluleke, lokhu kuyisibonakaliso sokuthi ungabuyeka nini ubudlelwano bebanga elide.

6. Ubudlelwano buthatha impilo

Esinye sezimpawu sokuthi ubuhlobo bakho bebanga elide buyaphela ukuthi uthola ukuthi ubuhlobo budla yonke impilo yakho. Kungenzeka ukuthi uchitha isikhathi esiningi ubheka ifoni yakho noma ulinde ikholi ye-FaceTime evela kumlingani wakho kangangokuthi uvumela izinto ozithandayo, izintshisekelo, noma ubungani buwele eceleni kwendlela.

Uma kunjalo, ibanga ebuhlotsheni mhlawumbe alisenempilo kuwe.

7. Ukwesaba ukudedela

Uyabona ukuthi uhlala ebudlelwaneni kuphela ngenxa yenkani. Ungahle uzitshele ukuthi uvumile ukuzama lobu budlelwano, ngakho-ke kufanele ubenze busebenze ngazo zonke izindlela.

Ngabe uhlala ngoba nje wesaba ukuyeka, kepha awujabuli empeleni noma wenelisekile ebudlelwaneni? Lapho-ke mhlawumbe sekuyisikhathi sokuqeda ubudlelwano bebanga elide.

8. Alikho ikusasa

Ukwehlukana kwebanga elide kungenzeka kusondele uma ubona ukuthi wena nomlingani wakho aninakusasa ndawonye.Ekugcineni, wonke umuntu ufuna ukwabelana ngempilo nomlingani wakhe.

Uma ungaboni wena nomlingani wakho webanga elide nihlangana futhi ninomndeni noma ikhaya ndawonye, ​​lokhu kungenzeka kungabi ubuhlobo bakho.

9. Izilingo eziningi kakhulu

Ukuqhelelana ebudlelwaneni kunzima kakhulu kuwe ukuthi uzizwe ulingeka ngabanye abantu. Uma uqaphela ukuthi ulingeka ukuba uhlanganyele ekuxhumaneni ngokocansi noma ngokomzwelo nomuntu osondelene nekhaya, amathuba okuthi ubuhlobo abusebenzi nawe futhi buphelile.

10. Umdlalo wokujaha

Uqala ukuzizwa sengathi uxosha umlingani wakho. Ungathola ukuthi ushayela umlingani wakho amahlandla amaningi ngosuku futhi ungatholi mpendulo, noma umlingani wakho akalokothi abuyisele izingcingo zakho. Ubudlelwano obunjalo bunzima, futhi budinga umzamo nokuzinikela kubo bobabili abalingani.

Uma kufanele uxoshe omunye wakho obalulekile, kungenzeka ukuthi abazinikele njengawe, futhi sekuyisikhathi sokuqeda izinto.

11. Umehluko omningi kakhulu

Ukwehlukana kwebanga elide kungenzeka kusondele uma wena nomlingani wakho nikumakhasi ahlukene. Ungahle ulangazelele ukuhlala eduze komunye nomunye, kepha uma uveza lokhu, umlingani wakho ushintsha isihloko noma abeke izaba zokuthi kungani kungafanele usondele.

Lokhu kungaba yisibonakaliso ukuthi ubudlelwano sebuphelile, ikakhulukazi uma uphatheke kabi ngawe nomunye wakho obalulekile osemakhasini ahlukene ngobudlelwano.

12. Ukuzizwa uvinjelwe

Ubudlelwano buqala ukukubamba. Mhlawumbe ubeka isikhathi esincane emsebenzini wakho ngoba uchitha isikhathi esiningi ocingweni nomlingani wakho.

Noma mhlawumbe weqa ukuzivocavoca kwakho ejimini, noma uvumela ubungani buphele ngoba ubeka yonke imizamo yakho ekwenzeni ubudlelwano busebenze. Uma ungeke ukwazi ukugcina ubudlelwano bese usaphila impilo yakho, sekuyisikhathi sokudlulela ebudlelwaneni bebanga elide.

Ukwazi ukuthi ubambelele nini kubalulekile njengokwazi ukuthi kufanele uyeke nini.

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13. Ukukhathazeka nosizi

Ukuqhelelana ebudlelwaneni kubangela ukukhathazeka okukhulu nokucindezeleka okungokomzwelo kunenjabulo. Kwesinye isikhathi lokhu kufaka zonke izingcingo ukuthi zilwe, noma ungahle wesabe ukuthola ucingo oluvela komunye wakho obalulekile.

Uma kunjalo, kuwuphawu oluhle lokuthi ungabuyeka nini ubudlelwano bebanga elide.

14. Zimbalwa izivakashi

Awusoze wahlangana ubuso nobuso, futhi awenzi zinhlelo zokuhlangana.

Mhlawumbe wenze amacebo okuhlangana kabili ngenyanga ekuqaleni kobudlelwano bakho bebanga elide, kepha uqala ukubona ukuthi izinyanga ziyadlula ungambonanga omunye wakho obalulekile, futhi akekho kini owenza imizamo yokuba nobuso nobuso- ukuvakashelwa ubuso.

Lokhu kuyisibonakaliso esicacile sobudlelwano obuphazamisayo, futhi sekuyisikhathi sokubudedela.

15. Ubuthi bungena ngaphakathi

Ubudlelwano sebunobuthi noma bukunika umuzwa ongemuhle wamathumbu. Ungase uzizwe kungokwemvelo ukuthi ubudlelwano abusakulungeli wena, noma mhlawumbe sebuyingozi kakhulu ukuthi wena nomlingani wakho nihlala nilwa njalo, noma nilala ebusuku nikhathazeka ngesimo sobudlelwano.

Lesi ngesinye isibonakaliso esihle sokuthi sekuyisikhathi sokuqhubeka nobudlelwano bebanga elide.

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Ungabuyeka kanjani ubudlelwano bebanga elide

Kunezizathu eziningana zokuthi kungani ubudlelwane bebanga elide kungasebenzi, futhi lapho ukwahlukana sekuseduze, kunezimpawu ezithile ezicacile zokuthi ubuyeke nini ubudlelwano bebanga elide.

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Lapho ibanga elide liba nzima futhi uhlangabezana nezinye zezimpawu ezingenhla, mhlawumbe uyazibuza mayelana ne- izindlela ezinhle kakhulu zokudedela ebudlelwaneni.

  • Khuluma

Ungaqala inqubo yokudedela ngokuba nengxoxo nomlingani wakho webanga elide. Yiba nengxoxo eqotho ngemizwa yakho, ukungabaza, nokukhathazeka kwakho, bese ubona ukuthi uthini umlingani wakho.

  • Mhlawumbe umlingani wakho uzizwa izinto ezifanayo, futhi nizofinyelela esinqumweni sobabili sokuhlukanisa izindlela. Ngakolunye uhlangothi, kungenzeka ukuthi umlingani wakho ubengazazi izinkinga futhi akwazi ukuthatha izinyathelo zokulungisa ubudlelwano.
  • Uma wena nomlingani wakho ningavumelani ngokuthi buqhubeke yini ubudlelwano, kungasiza thintana nomeluleki wezobudlelwano ukuthola indlela engcono kakhulu yokwenza.

  • Bayeke ngenhlonipho

Uma unqume ukuthi ubudlelwano abunakulungiseka, noma wena nomlingani wakho nivumelana ngokuhlukana, sekuyisikhathi sokuqala inqubo yokuyekelela. Uma kungenzeka, kuvame ukuba ngcono hlukana mathupha, ikakhulu uma senibe ndawonye isikhathi eside.

Uma lokhu kungenzeki, hlela ucingo noma ingxoxo yevidiyo, futhi nixoxe ngokuhlukana ngale ndlela, esikhundleni sokuthumela nje umyalezo, ongabonakala ungenanhlonipho futhi ulimaza.

  • Zijwayeze lokho ozokusho

Kungasiza ukuhlela kusengaphambili lokho ozokusho lapho wenza ukuhlukana kwakho kwebanga elide. A umngane noma ilungu lomndeni lingakusiza ekulingiseni ukuthi uzothini kumlingani wakho. Ukuzijwayeza kungakusiza ukuthi uhlale ubambe ithrekhi ngesikhathi sengxoxo, ikakhulukazi uma iba nemizwa.

Ngesikhathi sengxoxo yokuhlukana, gwema ukusola umlingani wakho noma ebagxeka. Thembeka ngendlela ozizwa ngayo, ngaphandle kokubabeka phansi noma ukubamangalela. Kufanelekile ukuthi ucacelwe ukuthi kungani ubuhlobo bungasebenzi. Kungenzeka futhi ukuba nomusa kodwa uqine.

Isibonelo, ungathi, “Ngiyakukhathalela, kepha isici sebanga elide ebudlelwaneni bethu singenza ngizizwe nginesizungu, futhi ngeke kusangisebenzela. Kungilethela ukudabuka okukhulu kunenjabulo. ”

Noma kunzima ukwahlukana ngebanga elide, ungazizwa udabukile ngemuva kwalokho, noma ngabe bekuyiyona ndlela engcono kakhulu ongayikhetha. Kungadingeka ukuthi uthinte abangane noma umndeni ukuze bakusize ukukusize udedele.

Kubuye futhi kubalulekile ukuzinakekela, zinike isikhathi sokwenza imisebenzi oyithandayo, futhi uhlele ukuhlangana nabangani ukukusiza ukuthi uhlale uxhumekile emphakathini.

Uma uthola ukuthi unenkinga yokuyeka, ungahlomula ngokukhuluma nodokotela ukuze asebenze ngemizwa yakho futhi alungise usizi lwakho ngokulahleka kobudlelwano.

Zama le mibuzo esheshayo ukubheka impilo yobudlelwano bakho bebanga elide zisuka nje.

Inqubo yokuqhubeka

Ukuqhelelana ebudlelwaneni kunzima, kepha lokho akusho ukuthi bonke ubuhlobo bebanga elide buzonqotshwa ukwehluleka. Lobu budlelwano bungasebenza uma bobabili abalingani bezinikele ekuxhumaneni ngempumelelo, ukugcina ukusondelana, nokubeka umzamo ebudlelwaneni.

Lokho kushiwo, izinselelo zingavela ngokungabi nokusondelana, ukuxhumana okulinganiselwe ngokomzimba, kanye nokuxhumana okungalungile phakathi kwabalingani.

Uma uqala ukubona izimpawu zokuthi ungabuyeka nini ubudlelwano bebanga elide, njengokuzwa kabi kwamathumbu noma ukuqaphela ukuthi ubudlelwano buyakudla futhi bukukhathaze, kungahle kube yisikhathi sokuqhubeka nobudlelwano.

Ukwehlukana kwebanga elide kungaba nzima, kepha ekugcineni, uma ubudlelwano bungenakusasa noma umlingani wakho engakwenzi ube seqhulwini, uzojabula ngokuhamba kwesikhathi uma ushiya ubudlelwano ngemuva.

Kungasiza ukuba nengxoxo nomlingani wakho mayelana nokukhathazeka kwakho. Uma ubuhlobo bungasebenzi, ungaba nengxoxo ethembekile yokuthi kungani isikhathi sokuqhubeka nokuthi kungani ubuhlobo bungasakusebenzeli.

Ngokuhamba kwesikhathi, uzoqala ukuqhubekela phambili, ikakhulukazi uma wenza ukuzinakekela futhi ufinyelela kubangani nomndeni ukuze bakusekele. Uma uthola ukuthi awukwazi ukunqoba imizwa yakho yokudabuka ngokulahleka kobudlelwano, unga usizakale ngokwelulekwa ukukusiza ubhekane nesimo.

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