-Delile
- 1. Ukwethembeka kubalulekile
- 2. Kungaphezu kuka-50-50
- 3. Veza imizwa yakho ngokufanele
- 4. Sebenzisa indlela enezinyathelo ezintathu ukubhekana nayo
- 5. Ukufunda ukuthethelela kubalulekile
- 6. Qaphela amabhomu
- 7. Bheka umlando wakho ufunde kuwo
Cabanga ngeqiniso lokuthi abantu ababili abahlukene ngokuphelele futhi abahlukile abanobuntu obuhlukile, abanezizinda ezihlukile, nezidingo ezihlukile, manje sebenqume ukuhlanganisa izimpilo zabo kule adventure ebizwa ngomshado. Ezinye izinhlansi zokungezwani nokungqubuzana akunakugwenywa.
Ngokushesha noma kamuva nizokhubekisana futhi nicasulane njengoba nibhekene nezingqinamba zansuku zonke nezinselelo zempilo. Ngakho-ke ungalilahli ithemba uma kunezingxabano nezinkinga emshadweni wakho - yazi ukuthi kuyinto ejwayelekile futhi ungafunda ukuzisingatha ngempumelelo ndawonye.
Eqinisweni, izinkinga zobudlelwano eziphethwe kahle zivame ukukusondeza komunye nomunye futhi ziqinise ubudlelwano benu.
Empeleni, uma kunokungqubuzana okuncane kakhulu noma ukungabikho kobudlelwano bomshado, kungenzeka ukuthi kusho ukuthi umlingani oyedwa (noma bobabili) akathembekile futhi ucindezela ubuntu babo ukuze kugcinwe ukuthula nganoma iyiphi intengo. Lena intengo ephezulu kakhulu okufanele uyikhokhe futhi ayibangeli umshado onempilo.
Ngokuphambene nalokho, kunempilo ukwamukela ukuthi izinkinga zomshado nezingxabano kuyiqiniso lempilo nokuthi zona ngokwazo, azinakulimaza futhi zingasetshenziselwa ukuqinisa ubudlelwano bakho noshade naye.
Kodwa-ke, indlela ozisingatha ngayo izinkinga zakho zomshado iyona ezonquma ukuthi zonakalisa noma zakha kangakanani. Indlela okhetha ukusingatha ngayo izinkinga emshadweni wakho izoba nomphumela owodwa kwemibili; noma ngabe izodala uqhekeko phakathi kwenu futhi ibangele ukuhlukaniswa, noma iyoqinisa uthando lwenu futhi inisondeze komunye nomunye.
Izinkomba ezilandelayo zizokusiza ukuthi uhambe uye ngomphumela wokugcina, okungukuthi ukubuyisana nokusondelana okukhulu.
Nazi izikhombisi ezi-7 zokusebenzisa izinkinga zomshado ukuqinisa ubudlelwano bakho
1. Ukwethembeka kubalulekile
Ufuna usizo lomshado ukuze unqobe izingqinamba zobudlelwano?
Ukuqinisa ubudlelwano benu nobabili kudingeka nizinikele ngokuphelele ekuthembekeni ngokuphelele komunye nomunye futhi nakuwe uqobo.
Lapho oshade naye ezwa ukuthi kukhona okukuphazamisayo bese ekubuza ukuthi, “Kwenzakalani Sthandwa?” akusizi ukuthi "akukho lutho" lapho kusobala ukuthi kukhona okungahambi kahle.
Uma ubeka izinto phansi isikhathi eside futhi uphika imizwa yakho yangempela, ziba zimbi kakhulu.
Bese kuthi ngolunye usuku lapho ingcindezi yanda kakhulu, kungahle kube nokuqhuma okubi okudala umonakalo omkhulu kakhulu kunalokho ukube ubusanda kuveza ukukhathazeka kwakho ngaphambili ukuze ugcwalise imifantu futhi uqinise ubudlelwano bakho.
Ukwethembeka kusho ukuvuleleka futhi okusobala kuze kube sezingeni lokuba sengozini ebuhlungu.
Kepha ukwethembeka kufanele futhi kulinganiswe nothando, ukwaba imizwa yakho ngokusobala ngaphandle kokulahla noma ukusola umlingani wakho ngezinkinga zomshado.
2. Kungaphezu kuka-50-50
Ubudlelwano obunempilo abungeke bakhelwa ekuhlelweni kwe-50-50 noma kwifilosofi. Umlingani ngamunye udinga ukuthi abe yikhulu lamaphesenti azinikele ebudlelwaneni okusho ukuthi uzimisele ukudlulela ngale komkhawulo ukuze asizane futhi asekelane lapho kudingeka. Lolu hlobo lothando lweqiniso alugcini amaphuzu futhi alucabangi nokuthi ngubani onikela kakhulu.
Ngokweqiniso, kubalulekile ukuthi bobabili abalingani beze ephathini - uma ngabe oyedwa uhlala enikeza amaphesenti ayikhulu ngenkathi omunye ethatha nje futhi efuna, ubudlelwano buzogcina buphelile futhi intukuthelo ingaqala.
3. Veza imizwa yakho ngokufanele
Ulimi lomzimba kanye nezinto ezingasho lutho zidlala indima enkulu endleleni esiziveza ngayo.
Ezinye zazo zingalimaza kakhulu futhi zingasizi ngalutho uma uzama ukuxazulula impikiswano, isibonelo ukumemeza nokumemeza, noma ukushaya izicabha nokuphonsa izinto nxazonke.
Ngakolunye uhlangothi lobubanzi, ukuthula, ukuphika kanye nokuvikela ngamatshe nakho kuyakha ngokulinganayo.
Imibhangqwana ebhekana nezinselele emshadweni ivame ukuzibuza, "wazi kanjani ukuthi umshado wakho usuphelile?"
Uma imikhuba enjengokuvalwa ngamatshe noma ukuphikisana okungapheli isusele ebudlelwaneni bakho, uma wena noma umlingani wakho nidlala ikhadi lesisulu noma umdlalo wokusola, ningathandi ukugudluka nokuxazulula izinkinga zomshado, konke kukhomba ukuthi umshado wenu usenkingeni.
Uma imizwa isiya phezulu kungcono uthathe isikhathi sokupholisa bese ubuya emuva kwesikhathi bese ukhuluma ngezinto lapho ukwazi ukukwenza lokho ngomoya ophansi.
Zama ukuhlala wedwa kuqala uveze imizwa yakho - mhlawumbe ungabhala konke phansi, noma uye endaweni ephephile lapho ungamemeza khona noma ukhale. Lapho-ke lapho uhlala phansi noshade naye ungakwazi ukuveza imizwa yakho ngokufanele, usebenzisa amagama acacile nathembekile.
Uma uthukuthele, ukhungathekile noma udumele, khuluma ngemizwa yakho usebenzisa izitatimende “Mina” (isib. Ngizizwa ngidabukile) kunokuba usho izitatimende “wena” (isib. Uyangidabukisa).
4. Sebenzisa indlela enezinyathelo ezintathu ukubhekana nayo
Akekho umuntu othanda ukubhekana naye kepha ukubhekana nakho kubaluleke kakhulu ngaphandle kokuthi ufuna ukungena ogibeni "lokuthula nganoma iyiphi intengo".
Uma kukhona okwenzekile futhi udinga ukubhekana noshade naye, kuyasiza ukulandela le rubrikhi elula ukuze uhlale endleleni futhi ungangeni ezingxenyeni ezisemaceleni.
- Okokuqala shono ngqo okwenzekile
- Okwesibili chaza ukuthi uthinteke kanjani
- Okwesithathu yisho ukuthi ubungathanda ukuthi lesi simo siphathwe kanjani
Ngokugcina lezi zinyathelo ezintathu ezilula ungaqiniseka ukuthi ugxila odabeni oselusondele futhi ubuyisele umshado ogcwele izinselelo.
5. Ukufunda ukuthethelela kubalulekile
Ukuphela kwendlela yokunqoba izingxabano ngempumelelo nokulungisa umshado ochithekile ukuxolela.
Lokhu kuletha induduzo nokuphulukiswa ukuze ubuyisane futhi uqhubeke ngamandla avuselelwe nokusondelana okujulile nomuntu omthandayo. Ukuthethelela kusho ukuyeka ukucasukela kanye nokufuna ukujezisa noma ukuziphindiselela.
Ngokwenza intando yakho uthatha isinqumo sokuvumela omunye umuntu ukuthi akhumule i-hook yakho bese uqala ikhasi elihlanzekile naye.
Lapho bobabili indoda nomfazi bengacela ukuthethelelana futhi baxolelane ngokushesha nangokuzimisela, umdanso omuhle womshado ungaqhubeka ngomusa.
Ngakolunye uhlangothi, uma umbhangqwana wenqaba ukudedela, ubambelela kokwedlule, ubambeke kulokho okungahambi kahle kwabo, bese uqhubeka uphendula amaphutha abalingani babo, kusobala ukuthi laba bafanelekile njengezimpawu zomshado zisenkingeni. Lokho futhi kuphendula umbuzo othi, "wazi nini ukuthi umshado wakho usuphelile?"
6. Qaphela amabhomu
Njengoba sekushiwo, izinkinga nezingxabano kuvamile futhi kulindelekile emshadweni ngamunye.
Kodwa-ke, kunezinto ezintathu ezingaphambanisa umshado wakho zizenze izivimbele ukuqinisa ubudlelwano bakho, futhi ngaphandle kokuthi kube nokungenelela okunzulu nokuzimisela ukushintsha ngokuphelele, umshado ungahle ungasindi.
Lawa ngama-A amathathu: ukuphinga, ukuluthwa, nokuhlukunyezwa.
Uma ulwa nanoma ikuphi kwalokhu emshadweni wakho, kuyizimpawu ezibonisa ukuthi umshado wakho uyahluleka, ngakho-ke sicela uthole usizo lochwepheshe ngokushesha okukhulu.
Uma uvumela isikhathi eside ukuthi lezi zinkinga ezibhubhisayo ziqhubeke, mancane amathuba okuba uvikele umshado wakho.
7. Bheka umlando wakho ufunde kuwo
Ungawulungisa kanjani umshado ophukile lapho bobabili abalingani bezimisele ukusindisa umshado noma ngabe kubonakala kunzima kakhulu?
Qiniseka ukuthi uphinda ugxile kokudlule kwakho njengoba kungahle kugcine umshado wakho nokwakha ubudlelwano obuqinile nowakwakho.
Noma sithanda noma singathandi, lapho sishada siza nokurekhoda okungabonakali, okuthe cwaka noma iphethini yomlando wethu, futhi ikakhulukazi kulokhu esikufunde emshadweni wabazali bethu.
Awukho umshado ophelele futhi mhlawumbe awuzange ube nesibonelo esihle ongasilandela ngenkathi usakhula.
Indlela abazali bakho abaphathana ngayo yilokhu okufundile ngokwemvelo ngokuxhumana phakathi kobudlelwano obuseduze, ukwenza imizamo yokuqinisa ubudlelwane bakho, nokulungisa umshado ochithekile.
Ngakho-ke kuyadingeka ukuthi ubheke kahle umlando wakho bese unquma ngokucophelela ukuthi yimaphi amaphuzu amahle ongathanda ukuwagcina nokuthi ibuphi ubuthakathaka ongathanda ukuvika. Futhi ngale ndlela, ngokuhlanganyela nomlingani wakho, ningenza igxathu elikhulu ekulungiseni umshado.
Ngokulandela lezi zingcezu eziwusizo zokunqoba izinkinga ezivamile zomshado, ungabhala kabusha ifa elingcono lezingane zakho futhi uqinise ubudlelwano bakho nomunye wakho obalulekile.