-Delile
- 1. Ukulalela okusebenzayo
- Ukubeka imigomo
- 3. Ukulingisa indima nokulingisa ulimi
- 4. Izinhlolovo zobuntu
- 5. Ukulungiswa kwezingxabano
- 6. Ukuhwebelana okungasho lutho
- Ukuxhumana nokwelulekwa ngomshado kuthatha ukuthatha
Lapho umshado unenkinga ngaso sonke isikhathi kubalulekile ukuzibandakanya ezenzweni zokwelulekwa ngobuhlobo ezisiza abashadikazi ukuthi basebenze ngezinkinga ezinkulu kakhulu.
Kusukela ekungathembekini kuya ekungathembekini, ubudlelwano bungonakaliswa kakhulu ukuxhumana okungaphumeleli, izidingo ezingafinyelelwanga, kanye nezidingo eziningi ezithinta umndeni. Ukuzivocavoca kwemishado yokuxhumana kungathuthukisa umshado futhi kusize imibhangqwana yakhe ubuhlobo obanelisa kakhulu.
Ngakho-ke, yini ukwelashwa kwezithandani ku-psychology?
Ukwelashwa kwezithandani kusebenzisa amathuluzi nokuzivocavoca okugxile ekuxazululeni izinkinga ebudlelwaneni obufaka izingxabano ngazinye noma izithandani, izinkinga zokuziphatha, izinselelo zokusebenzisana, nentukuthelo nemizwelo engaqondisiwe.
Ukuzivocavoca ngokweluleka ngomshado esikuphakamisa ngezansi kungasiza uma uzimisele ukuzibheka ngokwethembeka esibukweni futhi uzibophezele ekwenzeni ushintsho oluhlala njalo egameni lakho nophathina wakho.
Ungahambi ngomzila wezimpi ze-turf nezimpi ezibandayo.
Isikhathi nothando olutshalile ebudlelwaneni akumele kuphonswe enqabeni ngaphandle komzamo wokubuyiselwa.
1. Ukulalela okusebenzayo
Ukulalela okusebenzayo kuyingxenye ebalulekile yemizimba yokwelapha imibhangqwana yokuxhumana.
Ukulalela okusebenzayo kuyinqubo lapho abalingani bafunda ukuhlonipha amagama abiwe ngabathandekayo babo futhi baphendule ngendlela yokuthi amazwi aqinisekisa futhi athembe.
Usebenzisa ulimi lokuqala lomuntu njengokuthi “Ngizwa,” uzakwethu uyakwazi ukukhuluma ngezinto ezikukhathazayo, ukujabula, nokulwa ngaphandle kokululaza omunye ngezinsolo ezingafanele, ezingaphezulu kanye nezincazelo.
Uzakwethu ngakolunye uhlangothi lokuxhumana uqinisekisa ukushintshisana ngokuphendula, "Ngiyakuzwa usho." Ukuzivocavoca okunjalo kwemibhangqwana kuvumela abalingani ukuthi bagcine ukuxhumana ngenkathi besebenza kwezinye zezinkinga ezinzima kakhulu emshadweni womshado.
Kususelwa ocwaningweni oluzwakalayo lwesayensi nokuhlolwa kwensimu okuqinile, ukulalela okusebenzayo kuvumela konke ukuzwakala kanye nezindlela ezahlukahlukene ezingahlolwa.
Ukubeka imigomo
Ukuzivocavoca kwemishado yezithandani zokuxhumana kubeka ukubeka kwezinhloso njengepivot enkulu ekwakheni injabulo ehlala njalo emshadweni.
Imibhangqwana ekwazi ukukhuluma kodwa ifeze okuncane ngokushintshana kwayo kufanele icabangele ukubeka izinhloso.
Ukusetha izinjongo kuyindlela abalingani ababeke ngayo - kusengaphambili - amathemba abo engxoxweni.
Izinhloso zingafaka izinto ezinjengokuvezwa kokukhathazeka, izinhlelo zekusasa, nemicabango ngokungenelela okuqhubekayo.
Uma lo mbhangqwana ungakwazi ukuhlala emsebenzini ngenkathi kuqhubeka ingxoxo, izinhloso zivumela ukubuyela emuva kulezo zinto ezibalulekile ekubumbaneni okunempilo.
Njengengxenye eyinhloko yemizimba yokwelapha imibhangqwana yokuxhumana, ukubeka izinhloso kuyithuluzi lokuxhumana eliqondisisa kakhulu njengoba kunikeza irekhodi elibhaliwe lezifiso zangaphakathi zomlingani ngamunye.
3. Ukulingisa indima nokulingisa ulimi
Ukuvuleleka kokuyekethisa ulimi kubalulekile ekuqhubekeni kwempilo nobungqabavu besibopho. Ukufunda ukwamukela ulimi lokuyekethisa kuyingxenye ebalulekile yokuzivocavoca kwezithandani.
Izimfuno nezinqumo ezenziwa ngazimbili zizojulisa imishado futhi zidale impi engathandeki phakathi kwabalingani.
Ukuthola iqembu "elingathathi hlangothi" lokulamula phakathi kozakwethu nakho kungasiza ekuthuthukiseni ukuxhumana. Umuntu wesithathu angenza lula ukudlala indima okuvula imigqa yokuxhumana. Ukulingisa indima kusiza imibhangqwana ukuthi ibheke imiphumela isuselwa kuhlu lwezinkinga ezibhekwayo.
Imvamisa, umgqugquzeli usebenza njengokuma komunye wabalingani ukuze omunye afunde ngohlobo lokuhwebelana oluletha ukwethembana nokukhululeka kokushintshana.
4. Izinhlolovo zobuntu
Ukuzivocavoca ngemishanguzo yokuxhumana kuthembele kakhulu ocwaningweni lobuntu njengethuluzi elibalulekile ekwakheni ubudlelwano.
Ucwaningo lobuntu olufana nocwaningo lweMyers-Briggs nokunye okunjalo, lunikeza abalingani ukuqonda okukhulu ngendlela yabo yokusondela nokuhlala emhlabeni.
Ngemuva kokwabelana ngemiphumela yocwaningo lwabo lobuntu nabalingani babo, abantu bangathola ukuqonda okujulileyo kokuthi oshade nabo ubhekana kanjani nezingxabano, ibanga, ukukhathala, izimo zomphakathi, nokunye okunjalo.
Izwi lokuxwayisa mayelana nezinhlolovo zobuntu.
Kubaluleke kakhulu ukuthi inhlolovo ihunyushwe uchwepheshe wezengqondo. Ucwaningo olukhulu olungenayo impendulo yomtholampilo ucwaningo olungenanzuzo.
5. Ukulungiswa kwezingxabano
Ngokwakha ubudlelwano obuhle, izivivinyo zokwelashwa kwezithandani zokuxhumana zihlanganisa ukuxazululwa kwezingxabano njengesinyathelo esikhulu.
Ukuxazululwa kwempikiswano kuyisilinganiso esiphakathi nendawo lapho inkinga yomshado iba engabekezeleleki lapho abalingani basebenzisana nomlamuli ukubhekana nezinye zezinkinga ezihambisana nentukuthelo nentukuthelo.
Izinkinga ezivame ukubhekelwa ukuxazululwa zifaka phakathi ilungelo lokugcina izingane, ukuhlukaniswa kwezikweletu kanye nempahla, isondlo, isondlo sengane, nokunye okunjalo.
Imvamisa, ukuxazululwa kwezingxabano kwenziwa phambi kwabameli bezinhlangano. Ezinkantolo eziningi, ukuxazululwa kwezingxabano kugunyazwe ngaphansi komthetho.
6. Ukuhwebelana okungasho lutho
Kwesinye isikhathi imibhangqwana ayinalo ulimi namakhono olimi okuba nengxoxo enempilo mayelana nobambiswano nezinkinga.
Uma ukuxhumana ngomlomo kungasaphephile futhi kungasasebenzi, kungabaluleka kakhulu ukuthi abashadikazi bahlanganyele ekuxhumaneni ngempumelelo nangokuphephile ngaphandle kwamazwi.
Ukuzivocavoca kwezithandani zohlu lokuxhumana ama-imeyili, amanothi abhalwe ngesandla, nokunye ukuthanda ukuvumela abalingani ukuthi baveze imininingwane ngenkathi behlonipha indawo ebonakalayo.
Uma ukuhwebelana okungenziwanga ngamazwi kuthandwa imibhangqwana esenkingeni, kubaluleke kakhulu ukubuyekeza ukuxhumana okungenzeka ngaphambi kokukuthumela ukuqinisekisa ukuthi ukushintshana kunempilo futhi kuyakha.
Ukuzivocavoca kwezithandani nokuzivocavoca kobudlelwano bokuxhumana kwezithandani kuyanda uma abalingani bezinika isikhathi sokuhlola okunikezwayo okuhlukahlukene.
Ngaphandle kokuzivocavoca kobudlelwano bobudlelwano, kungasiza futhi ukuthatha inkambo yomshado eku-inthanethi ethembekile engakusiza wakhe kabusha umshado onempilo, igxathu negxathu ngosizo lokuzivocavoca ngemishado nezeluleko eziwusizo.
Ukuxhumana nokwelulekwa ngomshado kuthatha ukuthatha
Ukuxhumana kwezithandani kungachuma futhi uma kusetshenziswa amathuluzi emikhakheni yokwelapha imibhangqwana yokuqinisa ukuxhumana okunempilo, ukuthuthukisa ukwethembana, kanye nomoya omuhle emshadweni.
Uma ufuna izivivinyo zokuxhumana zemibhangqwana eshadile ngaphambi kokuthola ukwelashwa kokuxhumana kwemibhangqwana, kungaba umqondo omuhle ukubheka lezi zivivinyo ezinhle kakhulu ukusiza imibhangqwana ikhulume kangcono.
Uma ungaqiniseki ukuthi ungalutholaphi usizo lwezokwelashwa kwezokuxhumana noma izivivinyo zokuxhumana nezithandani, unganqikazi ukucela ukuxhaswa ngabangane abathembekile, ongqongqoshe, kanye nochwepheshe abaqinisekisiwe ukukusiza ukunqoba izingqinamba zobudlelwano.
Ukwelulekwa kwezokuxhumana kwemibhangqwana kuyithuluzi eliwusizo kakhulu lokuthuthukisa ukuxhumana kwakho kobudlelwano. Kodwa-ke, lezi zivivinyo zokuxhumana ngokwelashwa kwezithandani zizosiza kuphela uma uzimisele ukuqonda umbono womlingani wakho, ngenkathi futhi unakekela ithoni yakho nokukhetha kwamagama.