-Delile
- Ingabe usesimweni esihle ngokomzwelo?
- Thatha isikhathi sakho
- Nweba usesho lwakho
- Thola ezinye izimfanelo ezibanzi, ungabambeki emininingwaneni
- Ucansi aluyona into yokwenza isivumelwano
- Khetha umuntu okuthanda njengoba unjalo
Bekungeke yini kube kuhle ukube bekukhona ifomula yezibalo ngaphandle lapho okuthi, uma ilandelwa, iholele kumdlalo wothando oqinisekisiwe? Inhliziyo, nokho, ineqoqo layo lemithetho.
Isazi sefilosofi esidumile saseFrance, uBlaise Pascal, uthe kungcono: Inhliziyo inezizathu zayo leso sizathu asiziboni
Lokho kusho, lapho kukhona izinto ezibalulekile okufanele uzicabangele lapho ukhetha umlingani wokuphila naye. Ungasungula uhlu njengesisekelo okufanele usilandele esizoqinisekisa ukuthi umdlalo wakho uzoba nethuba elikhulu lokukunikeza ubuhlobo obujabulisayo besikhathi eside kunokuba umane ushiye konke ukuthanda, inkanuko nethuba.
Nawa amanye amathiphu okufanele uwacabangele lapho ufuna umlingani othandana naye, noma lapho ucabanga ukuthi umlingani wakho wamanje "nguye".
Ingabe usesimweni esihle ngokomzwelo?
Lokhu kungaba "yipipi" elimangazayo, kepha kunengqondo.
Ukuze ukhethe umlingani ophile kahle ngokomzwelo, udinga futhi ukuba sendaweni enempilo ngokomzwelo.
Abantu abadangele benza izinqumo ezimbi, ngokomsebenzi nangokomuntu uqobo. Bangaki ubudlelwano obubuyayo obuvele buphumelele? Bambalwa kakhulu. Ngakho-ke ngaphambi kokuhlanganyela, qiniseka ukuthi usebenze kuyo yonke impahla yakho engokomzwelo, uzenzele impilo ephelele futhi ejabulisayo, futhi ukulungele ukuheha umuntu ofanelwe wukuphila kwakho okuhle kakhulu.
Thatha isikhathi sakho
Lapho sikhetha umlingani wokuphila, sonke besikuleso simo lapho sihlangane khona nomuntu obonakala emangalisa nje. Konke kuchofoziwe ngalobo busuku bokuqala; uyashisa, unomsebenzi omuhle, akashadile, ubheke ukuthandana, futhi ubhekisisa wonke amagama owashoyo. Ushayiwe futhi ufuna ukuchitha isikhathi esiningi nalo mfana omkhulu ngangokunokwenzeka.
Kepha yehlisa ijubane.
Musa ukutshala wonke amandla akho angokomzwelo kulo muntu ngaso leso sikhathi. Qhubeka uphile impilo yakho enhle. Phuma nabanye abangane bakho. Sebenza kanzima. Zivocavoce.
Futhi uzihambise nalo muntu, umbone kanye noma kabili ngesonto. Uma lokhu kuyinto yangempela, uzofuna ukuyikhulisa kancane, bese uzinika isipho sokwazana ngokuhamba kwesikhathi.
Uma lona kungumlingani wakho wempilo, uzofuna ukwakha leso sibopho ngokwengeziwe, ukuze siqine futhi sihlale isikhathi eside.
Nweba usesho lwakho
Impela, unemibono yakho ngalokho ongathanda ukuba umlingani wakho wokuphila abe yikho.
Kepha vula izindlela zakho zokusesha kancane ukuze ukwazi ukufinyelela kwisampula ebanzi yabangaba abangane bomshado. Uma uhlala uwela ama-extroverts, bhekisisa insizwa ethule kodwa ecabangayo eqenjini lakho lencwadi.
Uma uhlu lwakho lwezifiso lokukhetha umlingani wokuphila lufaka ubungcweti obusezingeni eliphezulu bezinkampani, ungayinaki leyo nsizwa eyenza kahle ngebhizinisi layo lokuthwebula. Zinike isikhathi sokwazi abantu abavela kuzo zonke izizinda zokuphila.
Umkhathi ungakumangaza ngomlingani wokuphila ongabheki lutho ngendlela obucabanga ngayo, kepha ngubani ophelele kuwe.
Thola ezinye izimfanelo ezibanzi, ungabambeki emininingwaneni
Kungumqondo omuhle ukuba nohlu lwengqondo lwezimfanelo ozidingayo kumlingani wokuphila, kepha lokhu kufanele kube yimivimbo ebanzi hhayi izinto zokuphrinta ezincane. Ngamanye amagama, gxila kuzimpawu eziyisisekelo noma imuphi umuntu onenhloso enhle okufanele abe nazo. Uzwela, ubuqotho, ukwethembeka, umusa, ukuphana ngokomzwelo nokunakekela abanye.
Uma umfana wakho enazo, usuvele unaso isisekelo sobambiswano olukhulu.
Susa ohlwini lwakho lezo zinto ezincane ezingezona ezokuphuka ebudlelwaneni - okuhle ekuphekeni (lokhu kungafundwa), ungalungisa izinto endlini (ungakhipha lokhu), ukuthanda okufanayo kumculo (ngempela? Don ' Ufuna ukufunda ngamaqembu omculo amasha?).
Ucansi aluyona into yokwenza isivumelwano
Sonke siyazi imibhangqwana enokufana okuncane ngaphandle kokukhanukana komunye nomunye. Ungangeni ogibeni lokucabanga ukuthi uma izinto zishisa ekamelweni, kusho ukuthi lo mfana nguye.
Ubulili obuhle bubalulekile empilweni yonke yobudlelwano, kepha uma lokho kungakho konke onakho, akwanele ukwakha ukubambisana kwesikhathi eside.
Akuthetheleli nokuziphatha okubi kwezinye izingxenye zobudlelwano bakho. Ngakho-ke susa lezo zibuko ezigcwele inkanuko futhi uqiniseke ukuthi umlingani wakho wempilo unezinye izinto ezimzuzayo ngaphandle kwamakhono okulala. Ngoba ngesikhathi esithile kufanele uphume egumbini lokulala futhi empeleni uhlobanise ngokomzwelo nangokwengqondo.
Khetha umuntu okuthanda njengoba unjalo
Sonke sigqoka ubuso bethu obuhle kakhulu lapho siqala ukuphola.
Uzogqoka, wenze izinwele zakho nezimonyo, futhi ingxoxo yakho izoba nobuqili futhi iphuzu. Kepha njengoba isikhathi siqhubeka, nomuntu ofanele, nawe ungaba yilokho kanye oyikho: impelasonto oyichithe ejulukini yakho yakudala yasekolishi nezikhindi, ubukeka uhlanzekile futhi ukhathele ukuhambisana nemicimbi yezepolitiki.
Ngomuntu ofanele, ungakhululeka futhi ube neqiniso, ubonise zonke izinhlangothi zobuntu bakho kusuka kokuqine kakhulu kuya kokungavikeleki kakhulu.
Futhi usakuthanda. Lokhu akusho ukuzidedela uhambe, ukude nakho.
Sonke siyabathanda ozakwethu ukuthi benze imizamo yokusiqola, noma sekuphele iminyaka engama-20 sishadile. Kepha kusho ukuthi uma usuthole umuntu ocabanga ukuthi uyinto enhle kakhulu selokhu isinkwa esisikiwe, noma ngabe uhleli nje wenza iphazili yamagama ku-hoodie yakho yakudala nebhulukwe lokuzivocavoca, uzitholele umgcini.