-Delile
- IGhosting yigama elisha leqhinga lokuhlukana lobudlelwano elidala
- 1. Ubuhlobo be-Ghosting buyindlela elula yokuphuma
- 2. Ukwesaba ukubhekana ngeziqu zamehlo
- 3. Nciphisa ubuhlungu
- 4. Umuntu oyedwa unamathele kakhulu kunomunye
Ukwehlukana kuyingxenye yabo bonke ubuhlobo. Okunye ukuhlukana kuvame ukuba nokuthula kakhulu kunokunye kanti okunye ukuhlukana kunesibindi noma kumane nje kuyinto engathandeki futhi engazizwa kahle. Kungaba kuhle kangakanani uma ungaqeda ubudlelwano bese ngasikhathi sinye ugweme ubunzima bokuqeda ubudlelwano?
Njengokusika umlingani empilweni yakho ngokushesha okukhulu, ngokuqinile futhi ngomzamo omncane ngangokunokwenzeka? Uma lo mbono ukuheha, ungahle uthambekele emhlabeni "wesipoki." Umqondo wobudlelwano be-Ghosting uvame kakhulu kunendlela ocabanga ngayo.
IGhosting yigama elisha leqhinga lokuhlukana lobudlelwano elidala
Kungani abafana belahleka esikhundleni sokuhlukana? Ngoba ukungenisa umoya ebudlelwaneni kubonakala kuyindlela ephelele yokugwema ukuxabana, igazi elibi nemithwalo!
IGhosting igama eliye lavela esikweni lanamuhla. Ubudlelwano be-Ghosting kumane nje kuyigama elisha leqhinga lokuhlukana lobudlelwano elidala elaziwa ngokuthi “ukugwema” ezincwadini zesayensi yokusebenza kwengqondo. Ngokuphefumula, uvele unyamalale kwabanye bakho ababalulekile baphile.
Ngokwe-psychology of ghosting, inhlonipho akuyona imfuneko, kepha iyindlela. I-Ghosting iyathandeka futhi ilula kakhulu kunokuphikisana nayo yonke idrama ebonakalayo.
Ukuphefumula, othile kusho ukungayinaki yonke imizamo yabo yokuxhumana nawe-awuphenduli noma yimiphi imiyalezo yabo yombhalo, ama-imeyili, izingcingo noma imiyalezo ye-Facebook.
Kubudlelwano bomoya, uvumela izingcingo zabo ziye ku-voicemail, bese ubeka inombolo yabo ohlwini lwama-block ukuze ungatholi noma yimiphi imilayezo evela kubo; ukushiya umlingani wakho ecabanga ukuthi ngabe uyaphila noma cha.
Ukunyamalala ku-ether njenge-phantom kushiya i-ex yakho izibuze yona ukuthi ngabe ilahliwe yini lokhu okumayelana nomoya. Kepha kungani abantu abafisa ukuqeda ubudlelwano benza kanjalo ngokunyamalala?
Kunezizathu eziningi zokuthi kungani abantu bekhetha ukuqeda ubudlelwane babo ngokukhetha ukunyamalala. Ezinye izizathu ezijwayelekile zobudlelwano bomoya zithathwa ngezansi.
Qhubeka ufunda ukuthola okuningi ngobudlelwano bomoya nokuthi kungani abantu bephendukela ekuphefumuleni njengezindlela zokuqeda ubudlelwano.
1. Ubuhlobo be-Ghosting buyindlela elula yokuphuma
Akumangazi ukuthi ukwahlukana kuyamangaza kabi. Kufanele uhlale ngaphesheya komuntu obukade uthi “Ngiyakuthanda” ngenyanga edlule, kufanele ubalalele bekhala, futhi ubachazele isizathu sokuthi kungani ubudlelwano bungeke buphumelele.
Bangase babuze yonke imibuzo engathandeki enjengokuthi “Ingabe yindlela engidla ngayo? Noma ngidansa kanjani? Noma ngilele kanjani embhedeni? ” futhi noma ngabe uzimisele kangakanani ukuthi yebo kuleyo mibuzo, ngeke ukwazi.
Ubudlelwano be-Ghosting, kepha, buyakusindisa kuyo yonke le drama. Akusadingeki ukuthi ulungiselele inkulumo ethi “Akusuwe, yimina” noma ubanikeze isizathu esengeziwe sokudabuka enhliziyweni.
Le ndlela yokwehlukana ebudlelwaneni bokuphana ilula kakhulu, ilula futhi iyindlela elula yokuphuma yingakho abantu beyithanda.
Ngakho-ke, lapho umuntu enyamalala ngaphandle kwencazelo, usebenzisa izikhali njengezipoki zakhe njengecebo lakhe lokuphuma ngaphandle kokuzama ukulungisa izinto ebudlelwaneni.
Njengoba kugula njengoba kubonakala, emuva, ukhulule isikhala ozodinga umuntu ofanele ebudlelwaneni bakho besikhathi esizayo. Yingakho uma enyamalala myeke ahambe. Zenzele lowo musa.
2. Ukwesaba ukubhekana ngeziqu zamehlo
Abantu abaningi abathatha isinqumo sokuhlukana bavame ukucabanga ngezenzo nezinqumo zabo ngaphambi kokuzifeza. Umcabango wokuqala nokuphambili umuntu azizwa enecala, futhi ngenxa yalokhu, iningi labantu abavame ukuhlukana alifuni ukubhekana nezenzo zabo.
Laba bantu banamahloni ngezinqumo zabo kangangokuba bavame ukuzama ukugwema izinsolo nomdlalo olandelayo ngemuva kokwehlukana. Ukuvimbela ukuthi iqiniso liphonswe ebusweni babo, banquma ukuthatha umgwaqo olula bavele banyamalale.
3. Nciphisa ubuhlungu
Kukhona ukungahambi kahle, nobuhlungu obuhambisana nokuphela. I-psyching psychology ivame ukuhlotshaniswa nokubalekela ukuphela okungazelelwe.
Lesi ngesinye sezizathu abantu abaningi abasinikezayo lapho bebuzwa ukuthi kungani bebaphefumulile abalingani babo esikhundleni sokuhlukana ngokweqile. Lesi ngesinye sezizathu zobugovu nezobuphukuphuku ngoba abantu abaningi bakhetha ukutshelwa iqiniso ebusweni babo kunokutholwa umoya.
Ukuba nesipoki kungukukhahlela esiswini futhi kungesinye sezinyathelo zobugwala kakhulu zokubhekana nokulimaza umlingani wakho; futhi esikhundleni sokuzizwa kabi, laba bantu bavame ukugqoka uhambo lokuzidela futhi benze sengathi benza isenzo esihle ngokungafaki abalingani babo ebuhlungwini bokuphikisana.
4. Umuntu oyedwa unamathele kakhulu kunomunye
Ebudlelwaneni bokuqala noma ebudlelwaneni obusha, kungaba khona okunamathiselwe okuhlukahlukene kakhulu. Ngemuva koxhaxha lwemiyalezo emide futhi enothando, usuku olulodwa noma ezintathu, umuntu oyedwa angazizwa etshale imali egcwele ebudlelwaneni kunomunye.
Lokhu kungaholela kokunye umuntu ukuthi "Ngizogibela lo ngoba anginazo izinhloso ezinkulu kulobu budlelwano," futhi lokhu kuzoholela ekuthini ngiphefumulelwe. I-Ghosting ngemuva kobudlelwano obude nayo ijwayelekile.
Kodwa-ke, ukuphela kwendlela ongaziduduza ngayo ukuzitshela ukuthi umuntu okwaziyo ukukushiya ngemuva kwesikhathi eside kangako, mhlawumbe akakaze akuthande ngempela.
I-Ghosting ebudlelwaneni besikhathi eside inoyedwa nje onobuhle besivumelwano, naphezu kwabo bonke ubuhlungu nosizi. Uyaqonda ukuthi i-ex yakho ingumuntu owesabekayo, futhi ayikho indlela yokuthi ababili babuyelane.
Khula unikeze omunye umuntu ukuvalwa okuthile
Ubudlelwano be-Ghosting bungahle buthathwe njengendlela yokuhlukumeza ngokomzwelo, futhi buza nayo yonke imiphumela yengqondo nengokomzwelo enamathele kuyo ngemuva kokuhlangabezana nalokhu.
Lokhu kungokuhlangenwe nakho okuhlukumeza kakhulu ngoba ungashiya omunye umuntu emoyeni elenga ngaphandle kokuvalwa noma enye incazelo yokuthi uhlukanelani nokuthi kungani.
Umuntu othole isipoki angaqhubeka nokwakha izimo ekhanda lakhe zokuthi kungani atholakele futhi lokhu ngeke kubathinte kuphela emzimbeni kepha nasengqondweni, futhi kungenzeka bangaphinde baphinde bafana.
Le ndlela yokwehlukana ingathinta ukuzethemba komuntu nesithunzi sakhe futhi ingathinta nobudlelwano besikhathi esizayo nomuntu onesipoki. Ngakho-ke esikhundleni sokukhetha ubudlelwano bomoya, vuthwa, khula unikeze omunye umuntu ukuvalwa okuthile.