-Delile
- 1. Zazi
- 2. Khululeka wedwa
- 3. Thatha umthwalo wemfanelo
- 4. Yamukela abanye njengoba benjalo
- 5. Yiba namaqiniso ngobudlelwano
- 6. Thembeka futhi uhloniphe
- 7. Khulisa okuhle
Ubudlelwano bungathathwa njengobunempilo uma bobabili abalingani bezizwa besekelwa, bexhunyiwe, futhi bezimele ngenkathi bendawonye.
Ukwakha ubudlelwano obuhle kungaletha injabulo enkulu nokwaneliseka empilweni yakho.
Ubudlelwano obunempilo buba yitshe legumbi, indawo lapho ungaba ngokwakho futhi wazi ukuthi uzokwesekwa ngokuphelele futhi uhlonishwe noma ngabe impilo ikuphonsela ini.
Ngakolunye uhlangothi, ubudlelwano obungenampilo bunobuthi futhi bulimaza inhlalakahle yakho engokomzwelo. Ubudlelwano obungenampilo bunengcindezi futhi bukushiya uzizwa ungavikelekile, uhlaselwa futhi uzingabaza.
Kepha ungabugcina kanjani ubudlelwano obunempilo? Ingabe ikhona imfihlo yokuba nobudlelwano obunempilo?
Yebo, konke kuqala ngawe nokuthi uhlobana kanjani nawe, kanye nesimo sakho sengqondo ebudlelwaneni nakwabanye abantu. Ake sibheke ukuthi ungabuthuthukisa kanjani ubudlelwano obunempilo empilweni yakho.
I-athikili yabelana ngamathiphu ayi-7 wokuthi ungabugcina kanjani ubudlelwano obunempilo:
1. Zazi
Kuyisifinyezo, kepha futhi kuyiqiniso: Awunakuba nobudlelwano obuhle nabanye abantu uze wakhe ubuhlobo obunempilo nawe.
Ukugcina ubudlelwano obunempilo kuqala ngawe. Lapho uzazi ukuthi ungubani nokuthi yini oyifunayo empilweni nobudlelwano, ungaqala ukufuna ubudlelwano obufanelana nalezo zidingo.
Kubalulekile futhi ukwazi ukungazethembi, ukukhungatheka, izinto ezikwenza uthukuthele noma zikwenze uqhume, nokuthi uphendula kanjani ekucindezelekeni.
Ukwazi lezi zinto kwenza kube lula ukuphatha izingxabano ezingaba khona nokusingatha izimo ngomusa.
2. Khululeka wedwa
Ukunethezeka wedwa kubalulekile uma ufuna ukunethezeka nomunye umuntu futhi wakhe ubudlelwano obunothando obuhle nabo. Uma unethezekile wedwa, uzothola injabulo yokwaneliseka nokuziqinisekisa.
Lapho unethezekile futhi uphelele ngaphakathi kuwe, ungafaka ubudlelwano endaweni evulekile, enesisindo nethembekile.
Ngeke ubheke ubudlelwane bokukulungisa noma ukugcwalisa igebe empilweni yakho, ngoba uyazi ukuthi usuvele uthole ukuphelela. Esikhundleni salokho, ungajabulela ubudlelwano ngalunye ngalokho obuletha empilweni yakho, ngaphandle kokuthembela kubo.
3. Thatha umthwalo wemfanelo
Ungaba kanjani nobudlelwano obunempilo?
Ukuthwala umthwalo wemizwa yakho, izenzo zakho, kanye nokuphendula kwakho kuyizinyathelo ezibalulekile ebudlelwaneni obunempilo.
Sonke siyacasulwa abanye abantu kwesinye isikhathi - singabantu kuphela ngemuva kwakho konke - kepha singakwazi ukuphatha ukusabela kwethu futhi samukele umthwalo wabo.
Nguwe kuphela onesibopho sokwamukela ebudlelwaneni nokuthi umphatha kanjani omunye umuntu.
Ukuthatha umthwalo ngempilo yakho nobudlelwano bakho kukwenza uzizwe unamandla futhi kukukhumbuze ukuthi ungukaputeni womkhumbi wakho.
4. Yamukela abanye njengoba benjalo
Ubudlelwano obuningi bunqamukile ngoba elinye iqembu belifuna elinye lihluke. Kodwa-ke, awukwazi ukuphoqa abanye abantu ukuthi bashintshe futhi babe njengawe ofuna babe yibo. Konke ongakwenza ukubamukela njengoba benjalo manje.
Ngakho-ke, uma ufuna ukwazi ukuthi ungabakha kanjani ubudlelwano obunempilo, qala ngokwamukelana.
Uma ufaka ubudlelwano ngamehlo avulekile nokwamukela izimfanelo zomlingani wakho, iziphambeko, nezimfanelo, okulindele kuzoba ngokoqobo, futhi ubudlelwano bakho buzosekelwa ekuhloniphaneni, hhayi ekukhohliseni.
5. Yiba namaqiniso ngobudlelwano
I-Fairytale syndrome ingumbulali wobudlelwano oqinisekisiwe. Bonke ubudlelwano bunesigaba sangemva komshado, futhi bumnandi kakhulu, kepha akusona isisekelo sobudlelwano besikhathi eside.
Ufuna ukwazi ukuthi ungagcina kanjani ubudlelwane bunempilo? Thola okwangempela mayelana nobudlelwano bakho.
Kuzoba nokwehla nokwehla, izikweletu okufanele zikhokhwe, futhi mhlawumbe ngokuzayo izidingo zezingane, ukukhushulwa, noma ngisho nokugula. Umlingani wakho ungumuntu futhi unemikhuba ethile ecasulayo (nawe unjalo).
Zilungiselele ubudlelwano bomhlaba wangempela esikhundleni senganekwane, futhi ngeke udumazeke. Uzobe ulungele ubudlelwane obanelisayo obuhlanganisa nsuku zonke esikhundleni sokubunqaba.
6. Thembeka futhi uhloniphe
Ukwethembeka nenhlonipho ngezinye zezinto ezibalulekile ebudlelwaneni obunempilo. Ukwethembeka kumlingani wakho futhi ubenze babe phambili kwakho kwakha ukwethembana futhi kubakhumbuze ukuthi babalulekile kuwe.
Ukwethembeka kwenza kube lula kini ukwethembana nokwakha ubudlelwano ndawonye.
Inhlonipho isho ukulalela izidingo zomlingani wakho, ukukhathazeka, amathemba namaphupho ngokusobala nangokunakekela.
Kusho ukufunda ukukhuluma nangezinto ezibuhlungu ngaphandle kokuba nonya komunye nomunye, futhi kusho ukubeka impilo yobudlelwano bakho ngaphezu kokuwina noma ukuthola amaphuzu omunye komunye.
Khuluma nomlingani wakho ngendlela ongathanda bakhulume ngayo nawe. Gxila emizweni yakho nasezidingweni zakho, hhayi ekuzameni ukuzijezisa noma ukubenza benze ngendlela ethile.
Buka uDkt Emerson Eggerichs echaza izithako ezimbili zomshado ophumelelayo.
7. Khulisa okuhle
Uma ufuna ingadi enhle, unambitha futhi unisele izimbali, hhayi ukhula. Ukuthuthukisa ubudlelwano obunempilo kuyefana. Khulisa futhi ukhulise okuhle komunye nomunye nobudlelwano bakho.
Bheka konke ukuthi ubuhlobo bakho busebenza kanjani bese ugxila kulabo. Yenza okuningi kokusebenzayo nokuncane kokungasebenzi.
Lokho kubalulekile nakumlingani wakho. Bheka okuthandayo nokwazisayo ngabo, bese ugxila kulokho. Batshele ngakho.
Vele, izingqinamba zizovela kwesinye isikhathi futhi zidinga ukubhekana nazo, kepha ubudlelwano obuhle bakhelwe ekubeni nethemba nokunakekela, hhayi ukubelesela noma ukuthola amaphutha.
Ubudlelwano obunempilo bungenzeka kunoma ngubani ozimisele ukuzisebenzela futhi afunde amakhono okuba ebudlelwaneni obunempilo.
Zijwayeze ukwethembeka nomusa kuwe ukuze ukwazi ukuxhumana kangcono nabanye futhi wakhe ubudlelwane obenzelwe ukuhlala isikhathi eside.