-Delile
- Kusho ukuthini ukondla ubuhlobo?
- Kungani kubalulekile ukondla ubudlelwano?
- Yehlisa umfutho wegazi
- Ukwehla kwengcindezi
- Umqondo ongcono wenjongo
- Yini ongayenza ukukhulisa ubudlelwano bakho- izindlela eziyi-15
- 1. Khulumisana kahle
- 2. Yiba nenhloso noshade naye
- 3. Yazisa umzamo womlingani wakho
- 4. Yenza imisebenzi yokusiza
- 5. Thatha umthwalo wemfanelo
- 6. Nikeza umlingani wakho ukusekelwa okungokomzwelo
- 7. Thethelela umlingani wakho
- 8. Yabelana ngezinhloso zakho nomlingani wakho
- 9. Ukubekezela
- 10. Dala amanani ayisisekelo ebudlelwaneni bakho
- 11. Beka izinhloso zobudlelwano
- 12. Gubha izikhathi ezikhethekile
- 13. Iya eholidini minyaka yonke
- 14. Ukwehlukaniswa akufanele kube yisixazululo kunoma iyiphi inkinga
- 15. Iya kokwelulekwa ngomshado
- Isiphetho
Ubudlelwano budinga isisekelo esiqinile ukuze buphumelele. Uma zombili izinhlangothi zingahlosile ngobudlelwano bazo, ngeke zikwazi ukuma isikhathi. Ukukhulisa ubudlelwano kuyindlela ejulile yokwakha izakhiwo ebudlelwaneni bakho ongethembela kuzo lapho kunamanzi anezinkinga.
Ubuhle bokukhulisa ubudlelwano ungaqhubeka nokwakha futhi uthuthuke isikhathi eside ngangokunokwenzeka, futhi imivuzo imikhulu kakhulu. Kubantu ababuza ukuthi kusho ukuthini ukondla, lo mbhalo uchaza incazelo yawo ngokujulile nokuthi ungakwenza kanjani.
Kusho ukuthini ukondla ubuhlobo?
Ubudlelwano bungaba yinselele, futhi kwesinye isikhathi, uzizwa ufuna ukuyeka ukuhlala wedwa.
Kulezi zinsuku, abanye abantu bayasaba ukuba sebudlelwaneni obuzibophezele ngoba amacala edivosi nesehlukaniso ayanda. Abantu abaningi bakholelwa ukuthi ubudlelwano obuhle buzophela, ngakho-ke ababoni sisekelo ekubuqiniseni.
Kodwa-ke, ukukhulisa ubudlelwane kungokwenhliziyo enesibindi.Laba bantu bayazi ukuthi kunethuba lokwehlukana, kepha abakuvumeli kuchaze isimo sabo ebudlelwaneni. Ngakho-ke, bathatha izinyathelo zokwenza ubuhlobo babo bube buhle.
Uma kunezinkinga zobudlelwano, izinhlangothi zombili azivumeli ubudlelwano bube nokuhlukana, kepha ziyaxolelana ngenkathi zixazulula izingqinamba.
Kungani kubalulekile ukondla ubudlelwano?
Akuwona wonke umuntu oqondayo ukuthi kusho ukuthini ukuthanda uthando, futhi yingakho bengazinikeli kangako ebudlelwaneni babo. Ngokocwaningo, ubudlelwano bezothando obondliwe kahle butholakele ukwenza ngcono inhlalakahle yabo bobabili abalingani.
Nawa amanye amaphuzu akusiza ukuthi uqonde ukuthi kungani kufanele ukondle futhi unikeze okuningi ebudlelwaneni:
Enye yezinzuzo zobudlelwano obondliwe kahle kuncishiswa umfutho wegazi. Ubudlelwano obuhle kanye nokondla busiza ekwehliseni ukukhathazeka okungenye yezinto ezibangela umfutho wegazi ophezulu. Ozakwethu othandweni bazizwa bekhululeke ngokwengeziwe, futhi bahlanganyela kakhulu emisebenzini enenzuzo nenempilo.
Ubudlelwano obuzibophezele nabukhulisayo bunciphisa ukukhiqizwa kwe-hormone yokucindezeleka i-cortisol. Isizathu ukuthi unomlingani okuhlinzeka ngokuxhaswa kwezenhlalo nangokomzwelo. Bakhombisa ukuthi uyakukhathalela ebudlelwaneni, futhi yilokhu abantu abaningi abakufisayo.
Uma uthanda futhi unakekela lokho owabelana nomlingani wakho, kunikeza umuzwa ongcono wenhloso.
Uma unezinhlelo ngekusasa lakho, kuba lula ukukufeza ngoba unobudlelwano obunenjongo nomuntu okufunela okuhle.
Yini ongayenza ukukhulisa ubudlelwano bakho- izindlela eziyi-15
Ubudlelwano obunempilo bungumphumela wokondliwa kahle, futhi kunzima kubo ukuthi buphazamiseke. Uma ungazi ukuthi ungabondla kanjani ubudlelwano, lezi zindlela eziyi-15 zokukhulisa ubudlelwano bakho zizokusiza.
1. Khulumisana kahle
Ukuze unakekele ubudlelwane ngempumelelo, ukuxhumana kubalulekile.
Lapho uzijwayeza ukuba nezingxoxo eziqotho nomlingani wakho, ubudlelwano bakho buba ngcono futhi bukhuliswe kahle. Encwadini yakhe ethi "Making Love Last: How to Sustain Intimacy and Nurture Genuine Connection," uDokotela wezokwelapha uDavid Richo ugcizelela ukubaluleka kokuxhumana, kufaka phakathi ukucabanga, ukukhuthaza ukusondelana okungcono phakathi kwezithandani.
Uma ungakhulumisani kahle nomlingani wakho, kungaba nzima ukwazi ukuthi bazizwa kanjani futhi bacabangani. Uma kunokungabaza noma izinkinga ebudlelwaneni bokukhulisa, kubalulekile ukuzixazulula esikhundleni sokubayeka bashibilike.
2. Yiba nenhloso noshade naye
Esinye sezibonelo eziyinhloko zokukhulisa isimilo ebuhlotsheni ngenhloso. Udinga ukudala isikhathi sokuchitha nomlingani wakho.
Ungaqala ngokuhlela izinsuku, uye ebhayisikobho, uye eholidini, njll. Le misebenzi isiza ukukhulisa ubudlelwano bakho nokwakha ukusondelana. Futhi, kuyindlela enhle yokukhombisa umlingani wakho ukuthi ubudlelwane buyinto ehamba phambili.
3. Yazisa umzamo womlingani wakho
Ungenzi iphutha lokungakwazisi okwenziwa umlingani wakho, noma ngabe kuncane. Kubalulekile ukuthi wazi ukuthi ukushukuma komzimba okuncane kunendaba ngoba kukhombisa isimo sangempela senhloso yozakwenu.
Ukube bebenokuningi, bebezokwenzela okuningi. Ukukhombisa ukwazisa, ungavolontiya ukupheka nemisebenzi yasekhaya usuku lonke. Futhi, ungathenga izimbali, ubhale izincwadi zothando, njll.
4. Yenza imisebenzi yokusiza
Abantu abaningi bayazazisa izenzo zensizakalo kungakhathalekile ukuthi zinamandla kangakanani. Ngaphambi kokwenza lokhu, kufanele wazi ukuthi umlingani wakho uzonda ini ukwenzani.
Ngakho-ke, ungalusebenzisa lolu lwazi ukwenza leyo misebenzi ukuze ukhombise ukuthi ibaluleke kangakanani. Izenzo zenkonzo zingenye yezindlela ezingcono kakhulu zokondla umuntu ngoba ziyamjabulisa.
5. Thatha umthwalo wemfanelo
Uma kuba nenkinga ebudlelwaneni bokukhulisa, ungasheshi ukubeka lonke icala kumlingani wakho. Kufanele uthole ukuthi wenze iphutha kuphi futhi uthathe umthwalo ngakho.
Ungadlali umdlalo osolwayo noma ubeke izaba ngoba ngeke ubondle ngaleyo ndlela.
6. Nikeza umlingani wakho ukusekelwa okungokomzwelo
Lapho unakekela abantu nobudlelwano, enye yezimfanelo ezidingekayo ukwesekwa ngokomzwelo. Kufanele ukhombise umlingani wakho ukuthi uyamkhathalela futhi uzohlala ubalungiselela.
Ukukhombisa ukusekelwa ngokomzwelo, bancome, ulalelisise izingqinamba zabo, bese ubuza ukuthi banjani. Qinisekisa ukuthi umlingani wakho akazizwa eyedwa ebudlelwaneni.
7. Thethelela umlingani wakho
Uma ufuna ukubondla ngempumelelo ubudlelwano bakho, funda ukuthethelela. Ukubamba amagqubu kubuthinta njalo ubuhlobo bakho ngokuhamba kwesikhathi.
Esinye sezizathu esenza imibhangqwana noma abalingani baveze izingqinamba ezedlule uma benenkinga yamanje kungenxa yokuthi abaxolelananga ngezingxabano ezedlule. Ungazama into efana nesikhathi sokuzindla ngokuxolelwa okuqondisiwe ngokufanayo.
8. Yabelana ngezinhloso zakho nomlingani wakho
Noma sinempilo yethu uqobo kanye nezifiso zethu, kubalulekile ukuthwala ozakwethu sihambe nabo.
Ukwabelana kuyindlela enhle yokusondelana enezinzuzo eziningana. Uma kukhona umuntu oyedwa okufanele uzizwe usengozini ngenkathi wabelana ngezinhloso zakho, kungumlingani wakho.
Futhi Zama: Ulunge Kangakanani Wena nozakwenu Ekusetheni Imibuzo Ekwabelwana Ngayo
9. Ukubekezela
Ubudlelwano budinga ukusebenza kanzima ukuze buhlale bunjalo. Futhi yize usondelene kakhulu nomlingani wakho, ukusebenza kanzima kuyadingeka ukugcina ubuqotho bayo. Ngaphezu kwalokho, lapho izinto zinzima, udinga ukuthola ukuthi ungaqhubeka kanjani nomlingani wakho esikhundleni sokubushiya ubudlelwano.
Ukwenza ubudlelwano bukhuliswe futhi buqine, udinga ukubekezela ngezikhathi eziyinselele.
10. Dala amanani ayisisekelo ebudlelwaneni bakho
Kubalulekile ebudlelwaneni obukhulisayo ngalunye ukuthi bube namagugu ayisisekelo abagijima nawo. Lapho ubeka amanani ayisisekelo, awudingi ukulingisa noma ngubani ngoba noma yini oyikhethayo kufanele yenzelwe ubudlelwano bakho.
Lezi zimiso ezingumgogodla zikubuyisela ebhodini lokudweba lapho kunezinselele ebudlelwaneni.
11. Beka izinhloso zobudlelwano
Noma ngabe hlobo luni lobudlelwano bakho, kunesidingo esibalulekile sokondla, futhi ungakulungisa lokhu ngokubeka izinhloso zobudlelwano.
Qiniseka ukuthi lezi zinhloso zikhiqiza kahle ukuze ukwazi ukusebenzela zona nozakwenu.
12. Gubha izikhathi ezikhethekile
Uma ufuna ukunakekela ubudlelwano bakho nokuqinisa isibopho sakho, ungavumeli imicimbi ekhethekile ishelele ngaphandle kokuyigubha. Hlalani nigubha izinsuku zokuzalwa zomunye nomunye, isikhumbuzo senu, isikhumbuzo somsebenzi, njll ukukhulisa ubudlelwano.
13. Iya eholidini minyaka yonke
Ebudlelwaneni, ukuya eholidini kufanele kube umcimbi obheke phambili kuwo.
Ukuhamba ngeholide kusiza nina nobabili ukudala izinkumbulo enizozazisa, futhi kugcina ubudlelwane benu buqinile. Iholide yisikhathi esihle sokuphumula nokuhlola ubudlelwano bokukhulisa.
14. Ukwehlukaniswa akufanele kube yisixazululo kunoma iyiphi inkinga
Abanye abantu banombono oyiphutha wokwehlukana phakathi kwabo uma kunokungqubuzana ebudlelwaneni. Uma nihlukana, kuyindlela engaqondile yokuphakamisa ukungqubuzana noma ukuhlukana.
Ngaso sonke isikhathi yenza isinqumo sokuxazulula zonke izinkinga, noma ngabe inselelo kangakanani.
15. Iya kokwelulekwa ngomshado
Ukuze ube nobudlelwano obunempilo, udinga ukuhlola ukwelulekwa ngemishado. Kunezinzuzo eziningi zokuya kokwelulekwa ngemishado, kufaka phakathi ukufunda ukuxhumana, ukwakha imikhuba emihle, ukuxazulula izingxabano nokungaboni ngaso linye, njll.
Noma ngabe uzizwa sengathi ubudlelwano bakho buqinile, ukwelulekwa ngemishado kuyasiza ukugcina ungena ezilinganisweni.
Isiphetho
Uma kukhulunywa ngokukhulisa ubudlelwano, akukhona ukudlala kwengane, futhi akuwona umsebenzi wosuku.
Ebudlelwaneni, bobabili amaqembu kufanele azibophezele ekuqinisekiseni ukuthi ubudlelwane budlala kahle. Uma kwenzeka ukhulisa ubudlelwano, kunzima ngabo ukwehluleka.