-Delile
- 1. Mazise umlingani wakho
- 2. Yithi ngiyabonga ngezinto ezincane
- 3. Nakekela ukubukeka kwakho
- 4. Gcina ubuhlobo ngaphandle komshado wakho
Sonke siyazi ukuthi ucansi akuyona yonke into futhi luphela emshadweni. Siyazi ukuthi uma ubudlelwano bugxile kakhulu ohlangothini lwezocansi lobudlelwano obungenakugcwaliseka, kepha siyazi nokuthi ucansi lubalulekile futhi. Ngakho-ke sikuthola kanjani okusele?
Impendulo yalowo mbuzo ilula kepha ivame ukukhohlwa.
Ubudlelwano obunempilo futhi obulinganiselayo budinga umzamo oqhubekayo, ukuzibophezela nokwazisa komunye nomunye kanye namaqhinga amaningi abuye aziwe njengezindlela ezingezona ezocansi zokugcina umshado uphilile.
Ngokuba nemibono emincane nezindlela ezingezona ezocansi ongagcina ngazo umshado wakho uphilile, uzoqinisekisa kalula ukuthi ugcina ubudlelwano bakho bukhula futhi ibhonasi ingukuthi, lapho utshala kakhulu kulezi zeluleko namasu okugcina umshado wakho okunempilo kokuningi kuzoba nomthelela omuhle ekuxhumaneni kwakho nocansi! Isimo sokuwina.
Nazi izindlela zethu eziphezulu ezine ezingezona ezocansi zokugcina umshado uphilile okufanele uzame njengamanje.
1. Mazise umlingani wakho
Khumbuza umlingani wakho ukuthi uyabazisa, futhi uzikhumbuze ukuthi uyamazisa umlingani wakho (lokhu kuzwakala kungajwayelekile, kepha kulula ukuvele uhambe ngezinyathelo). Kodwa-ke, ukwazisa esixoxa ngakho lapha kusebenza kuphela uma kungokoqobo futhi kukhumbula.
Thola izindlela ezincane zokubonisa ukwazisa kwakho, bhala amanothi amancane, uqabule oshade naye kahle lapho bephuma noma bebuya emsebenzini. Futhi njengoba eminye imibhangqwana ikwenza kube yinto ephambili ukungalali ngengxabano (okuyindlela enhle yokubonisa ukwazisa kwakho kumlingani wakho) yenza iphuzu lokuthi ungalokothi ukhohlwe ukwazisana futhi ukukhombise lokhu ngangokunokwenzeka.
2. Yithi ngiyabonga ngezinto ezincane
Esikhundleni sokugcina umkhondo wazo zonke izinto ezincane oshade naye angazenza noma angazenzi ezikucasulayo, shintsha ukugxila kwakho esikhundleni salokho ugcine amaphuzu azo zonke izinto ezincane ezenziwa ngumlingani wakho noma angazenzi ezikuthokozisayo bese uzitshela kubo.
Ukuqiniswa okuhle kwenza izinto ezimangazayo ngokwengqondo yomuntu, ukuzethemba kanye nenhlalakahle ngakho-ke leli su elihle liyindlela enhle engeyona eyezocansi yokugcina umshado uphilile ngoba uhlala uqinisa okuhle emshadweni wakho.
Iningi lemibhangqwana lenza okuphambene, futhi ezimweni eziningi, ukwakhiwa kwalawa mazwana abucayi angagcina ehlukanise umbhangqwana. Uyalwazi uhlobo - 'I did x for you so now you need to do y for me', 'you never wash the dishes', 'why do I always have to ...' and so it goes on. Asikho kulezi zitatimende esiqinisekisayo.
Kodwa-ke, uma usebenzisa izitatimende eziqinisekisayo ngethemba, kuzoqinisekisa futhi kukhuthaze oshade naye. Ukuze kungekudala oshade naye azokwenzela okufanayo noma akhombise ukubonga kwabo ngokuzethemba kwakho ngendlela ehlukile kubo.
3. Nakekela ukubukeka kwakho
Wake waba nakho lokho okuhlangenwe nakho lapho kade uhlala nowakwakho noma umlingani wakho iminyaka eminingi? Banethezeke kakhulu kuwe ukuthi abenzi mzamo ngokubukeka kwabo - njalo. Ngaphandle kokuthi bayaphuma. Futhi njengoba behamba beyochitha ubusuku, noma phakathi nobusuku benu nizithola nivuma kaninginingi ukuthi umlingani wakho ubukeka kanjani. Mhlawumbe ngisho ukuthola kunzima kakhulu ukugcina izandla zakho kuzo.
Yebo, kuyefana nangenye indlela futhi.
Vele, uma nihlala ndawonye, unezingane futhi ubhekene nokuphila okumatasa kwansuku zonke ngeke uhlale ubukeka umuhle kakhulu. Kepha ukwenza umzamo wokugcina ukubukeka kwakho nokubukeka kahle, kaningi kuzovimbela ukunganaki ukungena, futhi kuzogcina inhlansi iphila.
Futhi kunenye inzuzo yokulondoloza ukubukeka kwakho, futhi lokho ukuthi nobabili noshade naye nobabili niyozizwa kangcono ngani, okuzokwenza izinhlansi zibaleke. Inkinga kuphela ukuthi, ngenkathi leli qhinga kuyindlela engeyona eyezocansi yokugcina umshado uphilile kungenzeka kube yinselele ukuphuma egumbini lokulala ngenxa yalokho!
4. Gcina ubuhlobo ngaphandle komshado wakho
Ukuchitha izimpelasonto uhambe nabafana noma namantombazane, ukuya emcimbini wokuzijabulisa osebenza ngezikhathi ezithile nokugcina impilo ezimele ngaphandle komshado kuzokwenza impilo yakho yomshado ithakazelise kakhulu.
Uzoba nokuningi ongakhuluma ngakho noshade naye njengoba ubadlulisela kokuhlangenwe nakho kwakho kubo futhi uzogqugquzelwa abanye abantu nezindawo. Okusho ukuthi uzoletha lokho kugqugquzelwa emshadweni wakho futhi okuphambene nalokho.
Ukuba nobudlelwano ngaphandle komshado kwenza omunye nomunye abe mnandi futhi abe nentshisekelo kokuhlangenwe nakho okusha. Uzothokozela nomzamo enizowenza nomunye ngenkathi nihlukene, ozoletha indlela entsha nejabulisayo engeyona eyezocansi ukugcina umshado uphilile.
Ngemuva kwakho konke, bathi ibanga lenza inhliziyo ikhule ngokuthanda.