-Delile
- Ukulinganiselwa nezicupho
- Ukulawula kuqhathaniswa nothando
- Ukuzithanda okuthembekile futhi okuyiqiniso kuyikhambi elingcono kakhulu
Ukuzizwa sikhululekile emhlabeni wethu, ezimpilweni zethu nasebudlelwaneni yisimo okunzima ukusizuza. Hhayi uhlobo lwenkululeko oluvumela ukuzibophezela ngaphandle kwemingcele, kepha inkululeko eqinisa ukuzethemba komuntu nendawo yakhe emhlabeni, kepha ivumela umoya wakho ukuthi ube yiqiniso futhi ukhululeke. Ukuzibophezela kuvame ukwethusa abantu abathanda inkululeko yabo, kepha kudingeka sibheke ukuzibophezela komunye nakuye uqobo ngendlela entsha.
'Kumelwe uthande ngendlela eyenza omunye umuntu azizwe ekhululekile.' ~ Thích Nhat Hanh
Ukulinganiselwa nezicupho
Sinemithetho yomphakathi, imithetho yobudlelwano nemithetho esizibekele yona elandela thina kusukela ebuntwaneni noma isidingo sethu semingcele. Eminye yale mithetho iphilile futhi iyasebenza, kepha eminye idala ukulinganiselwa okwenza abaningi bethu bazizwe bevalelekile futhi bevinjelwe - impela lapho sisayina amaphepha okufakazela uthando lwethu komunye noma "obophezelayo."
Abantu bathi bazizwa benamathele noma sengathi basesibayeni esingabonakali. Abanye abantu bazizwa ngale ndlela ngenxa yezindaba ezindala ezingqondweni zabo kanye nokwesaba ezinhliziyweni zabo. Kukhona labo abathembele ebudlelwaneni ukufakazela ukubaluleka kwabo. Kukhona abanye abazizwa bevalelekile ngoba bengazizwa belondekile ngokwanele ukuba babelane ngemizwa yabo yangempela ebudlelwaneni. Ezinye izizathu zivela ngenxa yomlando wethu nohlelo ekuthuthukisweni kwethu ngenxa yendlela esathola ngayo ukwamukelwa nothando noma singazitholanga lezi zinto.
Ngakho-ke, sizicupha ezinkolelweni zokuthi asilungile ngokwanele noma ukuthi omunye umuntu wenza okuthile ukusiphatha kabi, ekhombisa ukuthi asifanelekile. Lezi zinkolelo zivame ukubuyela emanxebeni ethu okuqala njengezingane. Empeleni, sakhulela ezindaweni ezingaphelele eseluswa impilo ngabantu abangaphelele.
Ngakho-ke singazizwa kanjani sikhululekile phakathi kwemithwalo yemizwa enjalo noma izingcindezi zomphakathi? Impendulo ilele kuleyo ndawo engcwele yenhliziyo.
Ukulawula kuqhathaniswa nothando
Kulula ukusola abanye nokuhlangenwe nakho kwethu kwempilo ekwakheni la makheji. Inkululeko yomuntu siqu yikhono okufanele likhuthazwe, hhayi into esingayinikwa. Kungumsebenzi wethu wezemizwa ukuphulukisa izibopho ezisibophile, futhi futhi kungumsebenzi wethu ukuvumela ‘omunye’ enze umsebenzi wabo wokupholisa izibopho ezibabophile. Lokhu kungenzeka kuphela kusuka endaweni yokuvuthwa ngokomzwelo okungokwakho nokwamukelayo hhayi okusolwayo.
Sakha imizwa evalekile ebudlelwaneni ukusinika amandla wokulawula. Kodwa-ke, ukuba 'olungile' kuvame ukusenza 'siqine' ngokweqile kulwazi lwethu. Siqala ukwenza lukhuni imiphetho futhi sakhe imingcele ebabazekayo nxazonke zezinhliziyo zethu. Le ndlela yokulawula ivame ukubekwa ukuze isivikele ekwesabeni ukulinyazwa - ukungathandwa. Uma senza imingcele esizibekele yona, sihlala silawula ukuthi ubani ongena nokuthi bafika kude kangakanani. Kodwa-ke lolu hlobo lokulawula nokukhohlisa ludala nokuzicindezela, ukuqhela kanye nalowo muzwa wokubanjwa. Uma uthango oluhlabayo oluzungeze inhliziyo yakho lusendaweni, kunzima ukuphuma ngokufanayo njengoba kungena ngomunye umuntu.
Ukuzithanda okuthembekile futhi okuyiqiniso kuyikhambi elingcono kakhulu
Silangazelela ukukhululeka. Futhi umuthi okuwukuphela kwawo wukuzithanda okuqotho, okuqotho nokwangempela.
Lapho siphika izinhlungu zethu ezijulile, siyaqhuma, sakhe izindonga futhi sisole umhlaba ngokuthi kungani izimpilo zethu nobudlelwano buhlupheka. Ukuphela kwendlela yokushintsha la mandla ukuvula inhliziyo yakho bese uzidonsa ngozwela lothando, umusa nentethelelo futhi ungene ezingxenyeni zakho ezilimele. Izindonga zizothamba njengoba uzivumela ukuthi uqale ukucubungula imizwa engaphansi kokufiselekayo yokungazethembi, wecala noma wokungabaza ozifaka ngaphakathi (futhi uvame ukuzizwa unamahloni ngakho). Lapho singabanikazi futhi sithatha isibopho sobuhlungu bethu, umnyango wenqola uqala ukuvula. Ukwethembeka komuntu siqu kungasabisa ukwaba, kepha lolu hlobo lweqiniso nokuba sengozini kususa intukuthelo, ukwesaba, intukuthelo nokusola esivame ukukubeka kwabanye. Azinasibopho sokululama kwethu nokuzikhulisa.
Uthando luyimpendulo ngempela. Hhayi uthando oluhlukanisayo noma uhlobo "lothando" olukha phezulu, kepha uthando olwamukelayo futhi luthembe ukuthi kulungile ukungapheleli, ukuphulukisa nokuthandwa emehlweni omunye. Ukuthola inkululeko ngaphakathi kobuhlobo obuzibophezele, kufanele uqale uzwe inkululeko engaphakathi.