-Delile
- Inkolo nelukuluku lokufuna ukwazi kungadala uqhekeko phakathi kombhangqwana othandanayo
- Ukuthola ukuqasha okusha kwempilo
- Ukuzuza ezinxushunxushwini ezedlule
Eminyakeni engamashumi amane nanhlanu edlule, ngoMeyi odlule, ngathi: "Ngiyakwenza". Ekuqaleni kweminyaka engamashumi ayisithupha, njengengane yesehlukaniso, ngafunga ukuthi lapho ngishada kuzoba unomphela. Ngo-1973 mina nomyeni wami sasuka ePhiladelphia saya eConnecticut sathenga ibhizinisi elincane. Ngabhalisa e-Connecticut College amatoho ukuqeda iziqu zami ze-bachelor.
Umyeni wami wayefisa ukuvelela futhi kungakabiphi, sakwazi ukuphuma esikweletini, saba nomuzi futhi saba isigaba esiphakathi esiqinile.
Sobabili sakhula sihlupheka, sisebenza imisebenzi exakile uma kuphuma isikole, siphithizela ukusiza imindeni yethu ngezinto eziyisisekelo. Ngokunotha kwafika inkululeko ethe xaxa yokukhetha ngokukhethekile, ukuthi ngangifuna ukuba ngubani, manje njengoba izimpilo zethu zazingasacindezelekile ngokwezezimali.
Engangikunake kakhulu kwase kusukile ekufuneni izingane nomndeni sekuya ekufundeni iPsychology, ngifunde okwenza abantu bakitaze.
Umyeni wami waqala ukusondela ekukholweni kwakhe, ebonga induduzo yethu yezinto ezibonakalayo, manje wayefuna ukujulisa impilo yakhe engokomoya. Akubanga nje isikhathi eside ngaphambi kokuba ukwelashwa kwezithandani kube yindlela yokuthi sibhekane nale foloko emgwaqweni ngaphandle kokusolwa nokusolwa.
Njengomzukulu wabasinda ekuQothulweni Kwesizwe, ubuKristu kwakungeyona indlela engingayithatha.
Ukuzinikela komyeni wami ezimfundisweni zikaJesu kwakuyiqiniso okwaphonsela inselelo inkolelo yami yokuthi ‘kuze kube sekufeni ngenxa yethu. Kwakuyisihlukaniso esinokuthula.
Inkolo nelukuluku lokufuna ukwazi kungadala uqhekeko phakathi kombhangqwana othandanayo
Ubani owayengacabanga ukuthi inkolo nelukuluku lokufuna ukwazi lingaqhuba igebe phakathi kwabantu aba-2 abathandana kakhulu? Imuphi umagazini wabesifazane ongakutsheli izingubo zangaphansi ezithandekayo futhi inqubo engcono embhedeni ingalungisa noma imuphi umshado?
Ngahamba ngayophothula iziqu zami esikoleni ngemali yesixazululo sesehlukaniso futhi ngabuyela ePhiladelphia ukuyophishekela i-MSW, engayiqeda ekuqaleni kweminyaka yama-80. Ngangithandana ngezikhathi ezithile njengoba indlela yami yomsebenzi yaqala ukugxila. Kwakungukukhetha okuncane futhi ukuphola nge-inthanethi kwakungeyona into okwamanje. Akunandaba ukuthi mangaki amadethi angaboni engizamile noma izingeniso zabangani ebengingazicabangi ngibuyele emuva enkambisweni yokuphila nomuntu, lapho sengizivumelanise nempilo ngedwa. Ngangihlala ngikulangazelela kakhulu futhi ngibhema ibhodwe eliningi kakhulu.
Maphakathi nama-90's ngathuthela eSan Francisco ngemuva kokuhlakulela intshisekelo yokusiza imilutha yotshwala nezidakamizwa ukuba ilulame njengompetha.
Mina ngokwami ngangisangulukile ngo-1986 futhi ngazizwa ngibonga ngokusekelwa nomphakathi owawungivumele ukuba ngizazi ngokujule kakhulu ngingahlulwa “yimikhuba kanye nezingcindezi zezidingo zamasiko. Bengihlala njalo ngimasha ngiya kudubhu wami futhi iSan Francisco yanginikeza ithuba lokuhlola izindlela zokuphila, ngangingakaze ngicabange.
Ukuthola ukuqasha okusha kwempilo
Ngenkathi ngiqhuba iSeminar Seminar ehlobo lika-1995 labasebenzi bezenhlalakahle eBay Area, ngabelwa umethuli-co co owaba nguMnu.
Ukusebenza ndawonye kwanginikeza ithuba lokuhlanganyela hhayi kuphela ifilosofi yami yokululama kodwa futhi ngifunde ngomzabalazo wakhe wokuzuza impilo nokuhlakanipha okungokwakhe.
Wayengumzali ongayedwa, ekhulisa indodana yakhe eyeve eshumini nambili eBerkeley futhi wayengajahile ukushintsha indlela yakhe yokuphila. Ngangisungule umkhuba wokuzindla nomphakathi eSan Francisco futhi ngangingenantshisekelo yokuthuthela e-East Bay.
Ngokushesha phambili iminyaka engama-23, sesibe abalingani bomphefumulo abazinikele. Indodana yakhe isishadile yathuthela e-NYC futhi sahlala enkambisweni yezimpelasonto nangoLwesithathu ebusuku sindawonye futhi ngoLwesibili nangoLwesine sisodwa.
Ukuzuza ezinxushunxushwini ezedlule
Ngokubheka emuva, konke kuzwakala kunzima kakhulu futhi ngicabanga ukuthi ukuhlangana maphakathi neminyaka engamashumi amane nomsebenzi omningi kangaka womuntu siqu ngaphansi kwamabhande ethu izinto ezenziwe zaba lula. Noma mhlawumbe sazuza ebunzimeni obuningi, isizungu nokuba wedwa okwenzeka ngaphambi kokuba sihlangane. Engikwaziyo ukuthi kuyasisebenzela.
Ngizizwa ngilondeke kakhudlwana futhi ngizinikele ebudlelwaneni bethu yize kungekho ukuhleleka kwangaphandle kwelayisense yomshado. Ukushada nomuntu oyedwa kube yindlela yethu yokuzikhethela kanye nenkululeko yokuba ndawonye noma cha ngandlela thile igcina uthando luphila. Ngiba neminyaka engama-70 ngonyaka ozayo futhi ngithatha usuku ngalunye njengoba kufika. Ngicabanga ukuthi ekugcineni ngizizwa ngibusisekile, kuyo yonke le minyaka kamuva, ukuthi ngishade ngokuphelele ngokuphelele.