-Delile
- Isigaba 1 - Wena (ekugcineni) uqinisekisa izinsolo zakho
- Isigaba 2– Ukushaqeka kokukhashelwa kanye nosizi
- Isigaba 3 - Ukwamukelwa
- Isigaba 4 - Ukwakhiwa kabusha kobudlelwano nokuxhumana kabusha nomyeni wakho
Ngeshwa, amakhosikazi amaningi azithola esesimweni sokuzibuza ukuthi angawaxolela kanjani amadoda abo ngokubakhohlisa nangokubakhohlisa. Izibalo ziveza ukuthi kuningi ukukopela emshadweni. Cishe emshadweni owodwa kwemithathu umlingani oyedwa noma bobabili bavuma ukwephulwa okunjalo. Futhi, nazo lezi zinombolo kufanele zithathwe ngohlamvu lukasawoti, ngoba ukugcina imfihlo yendaba kuyinto ehamba phambili kubo bonke abakopelayo. Ngakho-ke, akumangalisi ukuthi uzithole uzama ukuthola ukuthi ungakudlula kanjani ukungathembeki komyeni wakho. Nakhu ukuthi inqubo yokwelashwa izohamba kanjani, nokuthi ungayisiza kanjani.
Isigaba 1 - Wena (ekugcineni) uqinisekisa izinsolo zakho
Noma ngubani odlulile ekutholeni ngodaba lomyeni wakhe uzokuqinisekisa - ayikho into efana nokuthi “Akumangazanga”. Kuhlala kushaqisa njalo. Akunandaba ukuthi unesikhathi esingakanani usola, ubulokhu wenza izaba. Uma wayehlala emsebenzini sekwephuzile, usebenze kanzima ukukholwa ukuthi unomphathi omubi kakhulu emhlabeni wonke.
Ngakho-ke, lapho ekugcineni uqinisekisa ukwesaba kwakho, lokhu ngeke kube njengokushaqeka okukhulu empilweni yakho yonke. Cishe uzizwe sengathi umhlaba wahlukana. Futhi eyakho yenza, impela. Konke obukucabanga ngempilo yakho, umndeni wakho, umshado wakho nekusasa lakho, sekuyabuzwa.
Kungakho kubalulekile kini nobabili, kanye nenqubo yakho yokuxolela, ukuthi nihlale phansi nihlaziye okwenzekile. Kuzoba nzima kini nobabili. Ukuze abuke ubuhlungu ayebuzile. Ukuze uzwe ukuthi yini emenze wakwenza. Ungase uzwe izinto ongafuni ukucabanga ngazo njengamanje. Kepha, lapho uqonda ngokushesha izizathu nokuthi zenzeke kanjani, uzokwazi ukudlulela kusigaba esilandelayo ngokushesha.
Isigaba 2– Ukushaqeka kokukhashelwa kanye nosizi
Ngemuva kokuthi usuqonde ukuthi kwenzekeni kahle emshadweni wakho nangaphandle kwawo, uzofika esigabeni sokudabuka. Ulahlekelwe okuthile. Uphucwe umbono wakho ngempilo yakho, umyeni wakho, nekusasa lakho ndawonye. Izinto ngeke ziphinde zifane. Futhi ukuqaphela okunjalo kudinga ukuthi uthathe isikhathi sokudabuka.
Ungadlula kanjani kulesi sigaba ngempumelelo, futhi ngokushesha? Ngokubona lokho, yize ungakucelanga, umshado wakho ngemuva kwendaba ungaba ngcono. Akudingi nje kuphela ukuthi kube ukuphela kobuhlobo, kungabuguqula bube yinto entsha futhi buqine kakhulu. Noma ungahle ungakukholwa kulesi sikhathi, miningi imishado ekwazile ukuchuma ngemuva kokungathembeki kwendoda.
Kepha, okwamanje, gxila kwimizwa yakho. Ungalwi nabo ungazami ukugwema noma ukuphika ubuhlungu. Musa ukuziphoqa ekubeni namandla futhi usheshe ululungise lolu daba. Unelungelo lokulilela ukulahlekelwa kwakho, futhi ukwenze isikhathi eside ngokwesidingo sakho. Ungayesabi imizwa yakho, mayiyeke igijime, ukuze ululame uma usuhlangane nayo yonke.
Isigaba 3 - Ukwamukelwa
Ngemuva kokudlula kokushaqeka nentukuthelo ehambisana nakho, futhi ngemuva kokuthi uchithe isikhathi esilinganayo usizi ngokulahlekelwa ngumshado wakho njengoba wazi, sekuyisikhathi sokukhula kule mizwa. Lapho nobabili seniphumile ngomkhumbi ngenxa yesiyaluyalu sesipiliyoni esibuhlungu, nizoqala ukuzwa isigaba sokwamukelwa esizolile.
Ukwamukelwa akusho, nokho, ukuphika ubunzima bento eyenzekile. Akulindelekile ukuthi uthi konke bekulungile. Akufanele wamukele ukuthi ukulinyazwa nokuqanjelwa amanga kuyinto ejwayelekile entsha. Ngokuphambene nalokho. Kukhumbula izizathu zokuthi kungani kwenzeke futhi ufunde kukho.
Kulesi sigaba, ngokwamukela lolu daba, izimbangela zalo nemiphumela yalo, wamukela nokuthi manje ususendleleni entsha. Lo mgwaqo uzobhampa ekuqaleni, njengoba usazohlala ngezindlela ezintsha. Kufanele ukwamukele ukuthi umshado wakho njengoba wawunjalo ngaphambi kokuthandana wawungaphelele. Kufanele futhi ufunde ukubona ngamehlo omyeni wakho. Yiyo kuphela indlela yokukwazi ukumxolela.
Isigaba 4 - Ukwakhiwa kabusha kobudlelwano nokuxhumana kabusha nomyeni wakho
Ekugcineni, ngemuva kokuthi wamukele ubuqiniso bobudlelwano bakho, nombono womyeni wakho (ongafaka ukungapheleli kwakho futhi), manje ususendleleni ebheke ebudlelwaneni obusha, obuqinile, obusobala nobunzulu kakhulu. Manje usuthandana futhi, kuphela nendoda oyaziyo futhi oyiqonda kangcono kakhulu.