-Delile
- 1. Khipha “isehlukaniso” esilulumagama sakho
- 2. Khumbula ukuthi kungani washada kwasekuqaleni
- 3. Ungakhohlwa ushintsho lwangaleyo sizini
- 4. Funa ukwelulekwa ngokomqondo
- 5. Thola ukwesekwa kwabanye
Kuphephile impela ukusho ukuthi akekho umuntu ohlela ukushada ohlela ukuthola isehlukaniso noma azibuze ungamisa kanjani isehlukaniso singenzeki. Kodwa-ke ngokudabukisayo, izibalo zikhomba ukuthi kuyenzeka impela emibhangqwaneni eminingi.
Ngokwemibiko eshicilelwe, amaphesenti angaphezulu kwama-40 emishado yokuqala, cishe amaphesenti angama-60 emishado yesibili kanye namaphesenti angama-73 emishado yesithathu azophela ngabesilisa nabafazi abemi phambi kwejaji abacele ukuthi imishado yabo ichithwe.
Kodwa-ke ngaphandle kweqiniso lokuthi isehlukaniso yinto enzima ngempela kwabashadikazi, futhi kuyinselele ezinganeni zabo, emndenini nakubangane futhi abanye bathi, ngisho nomphakathi wonkana.
Lokho kungenxa yokuthi kunabantu abaningi abakholelwa ukuthi umndeni uyitshe legumbi lapho izinto eziningi zakhiwe khona. Futhi-ke, lapho ngisho umndeni owodwa uhlukana, kunomphumela we-domino ongalimaza ngempela.
Kodwa wenzani uma usemshadweni onezinkinga? Yiziphi izinyathelo ongazithatha ukumisa isehlukaniso noma ukuthi ungamisa kanjani isehlukaniso futhi ugcine umshado wakho?
Ngakho-ke uma uzithola usesimweni lapho uzama ukuthola ukuthi ungakugwema kanjani ukuthola isehlukaniso? noma ungayimisa kanjani isehlukaniso? Nawa amathiphu amahlanu angakusiza wena noshade naye ukuthola ukukhanya kwethemba futhi uthathe izinyathelo zokugwema isehlukaniso nokuphulukisa ubudlelwano bakho.
Ukufunda Okuhlobene: Uthini Umlinganiso Wesehlukaniso eMelika Ngomshado
1. Khipha “isehlukaniso” esilulumagama sakho
Njengoba nje bekufanele ukhethe ukushada, isehlukaniso ngaso sonke isikhathi siyisinqumo. Into emangazayo ngaleli phuzu kusho ukuthi wena noshade naye ninamandla okuvimbela ukuphela komshado wenu nokumisa isehlukaniso.
Into enhle ukuthi konke kuqala ngesinqumo sokungaze uveze igama elithi "isehlukaniso" ezingxoxweni zakho. Kulimale. Casukile. Khungatheka. Kepha futhi yiba uhlobo lwezithandani ezimisele ukusindisa umshado esahlukanisweni futhi ungavumeli isehlukaniso sibe yinto ongakhetha kuyo ekhaya lakho.
Imizamo oyifaka ebuhlotsheni ingukuphindiselwa kokukhetha okwenzayo, futhi uma ungafuni ukuhlukaniswa nomlingani wakho kunokumisa isehlukaniso kufanele kube njalo kuqala futhi kube uwukuphela kokukhetha.
Ngakho-ke khumbula, noma ngabe kunzima kangakanani ukuthola lokho indlela engcono yokumisa isehlukaniso ukungakucabangi nokukucabanga.
2. Khumbula ukuthi kungani washada kwasekuqaleni
Indoda ehlakaniphile yake yathi ngezikhathi lapho uzizwa sengathi ufuna ukuyeka okuthile, khumbula ukuthi kungani uqale. Ngosuku lwakho lomshado, wena nomlingani wakho nenza izifungo zokuba nibe nobudlelwano phakathi kwakho konke lokho.
Lokhu kusho ukuthi noma ngabe yini, uzibophezele ekubeni nomhlane womunye nomunye. Impela kungahle kube yinselelo manje, kepha kunethuba elihle lokuthi ungaphumelela ekusebenzeni ngezinto ndawonye kunokuhlukana.
Umshado usebenza kuphela lapho umbhangqwana usesimeni esisodwa, futhi ukuqina nokuzibophezela kwabo kuvivinywa lapho kuhamba ubunzima. Washada, ngokwengxenye, ukuze ube uhlelo lokuxhasana. Izikhathi ezinzima kungaba yisikhathi sokuhlangana ndawonye; bangasuki komunye nomunye.
Funa ulwelwesi lwesiliva, futhi yebo, wonke amafu anayo ngempela. Sesha lelo themba, lokho kukhanya ebumnyameni bese wakhela phezu kwalo. Kungaba nzima, ukugembula kungaba. Kepha kulapho uthando lwakho luzobhekana novivinyo olunzima kakhulu.
Umshado wakho, izimiso zakho ezinhle, uthando lwakho ngomunye nomunye, konke bekuzovivinywa, ngakho-ke zikhumbuze ngezinto obulokhu uzithanda ngomlingani wakho futhi ubambelele kuzo futhi ngokuhamba kwesikhathi kuzoba ngenye yazo izindlela ezinhle zokumisa isehlukaniso.
Futhi Buka: Izizathu Eziningi Ezivamile Zesehlukaniso
3. Ungakhohlwa ushintsho lwangaleyo sizini
Kokuhle noma kokubi. ” Lesi yisisho okungenzeka usishilo ngenkathi ufunda izifungo zakho zomshado. Futhi noma kungabonakala njengokutheleka okungapheli kokuya kokubi, kodwa kufanele ukhumbule ukuthi izinkathi ziyafika nezikhathi ziyahamba.
Ushintsho luwukuphela kwento engaguquguquki, ngakho-ke namuhla uma konke kubonakala kuphukile kusasa uzothola ithuba lokukuchibiyela.
Ungagxili kakhulu kokudlule uze ulahle ithemba lokuthi kuzoba nenjabulo ngokuzayo. Yiba nesineke, futhi awukwazi ukulwa nesikhathi, futhi awunakuphikisana naso, ezinye izinto kufanele zigijime. Kufana nezikhathi ezishintshayo; kuhlale kukhona okulandelayo ngqo ekhoneni.
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4. Funa ukwelulekwa ngokomqondo
Akungabazeki ngakho. Enye yezindlela eziphumelela kakhulu zokumisa isehlukaniso ukubona umeluleki.
Banamakhono futhi bakufanelekele ukukunikeza ngamathiphu namathuluzi wokuthi ungazilungisa kanjani izingqinamba onazo njengamanje nokuthi ungazivimbela kanjani izinto zikhuphuke ziye eqophelweni lokucabangela isehlukaniso ngokuzayo.
Ukwelulekwa ngemishado nakanjani kungakunika indawo yokubhekana nazo zonke izinkinga ezibonakala zicindezela umshado wakho maqondana nesehlukaniso, futhi lapho unikezwa isikhathi esanele nokululekwa ngokuzibophezela kungakusiza uqonde ukuthi umisa kanjani isehlukaniso noma ukuthi ungahlukanisi kanjani.
Into ebalulekile okufanele uyikhumbule lapho ufuna ukwelulekwa ngomshado ukuthola umeluleki wemishado ongcono kakhulu; ngoba ukwelulekwa ngomshado kufana nomeluleki kuphela. Cela abangani bakho noma umndeni wakho, noma useshe izinkomba ezinokwethenjelwa ukuthola umeluleki ofanele ongakusiza yeka isehlukaniso.
5. Thola ukwesekwa kwabanye
Okuthile okudingwa yibo bonke imibhangqwana eshadile eminye imibhangqwana eshadile; ikakhulukazi, enye uphilile imibhangqwana eshadile. Yize ungekho umshado ophelele (futhi lokho kungenxa yokuthi abekho abantu ababili abaphelele), izindaba ezimnandi ukuthi kunemishado echumayo.
Lokho kungenxa yokuthi indoda nenkosikazi bazibophezele ekuthandaneni, ukuhloniphana nokuhlala ndawonye kuze kube yilapho ukufa kuhlukana kubo. Ukuba nalolo hlobo lwethonya empilweni yakho kungaba yilokho okudingayo ukuze uthole wena noshade naye ezikhathini ezinzima.
Wonke umuntu udinga ukusekelwa, kufaka phakathi imibhangqwana eshadile. Futhi okunye kokusekelwa okuhle kakhulu abanye abangane abashadile abaphilile futhi abajabulayo.
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