-Delile
- 1. Lalelisisa
- 2. Lawula ukugxekwa
- 3. Namathela esihlokweni
- 4. Vumela ngezinye izikhathi
- 5. Ungagxili kuwe kuphela
Ukukhulumisana okuphumelelayo emshadweni kuhilela okungaphezu nje kokukhuluma.
Konke kumayelana nokuqonda umlingani wakho, ukubalalela uma kukhona ukungaboni ngaso linye emshadweni, ukwethembeka, nokuzivulela wena nobuthakathaka bakho kubo.
Vele, konke lokhu kulula ukukusho kunokukwenza.Amaphethini wokuxhumana asebenzayo akusiza ekubhekaneni nokungavumelani emshadweni kungathatha iminyaka ukusungula, kuhlanganiswe nomzamo omkhulu.
Futhi-ke, nakanjani niyoba nokungaboni ngaso linye, okungabucindezela ubuhlobo benu. Kodwa-ke, okumele uqaphele ukuthi ukwaneliseka emshadweni kuncike ekutheni ukhuluma ngekhono kangakanani nowakwakho.
Kwesinye isikhathi, izimo ezithile zingaholela ekubeni sikholelwe ukuthi sanele, bese siphendula ngokunikeza ozakwethu ukuthula, ukuphawula okunokhahlo, noma ngamabomu ukusho izinto ezilukhuni ukubalimaza.
Konke lokhu kungalimaza unomphela ubuhlobo.
Kuyaqondakala ukuba sezingeni eliphakeme nokukhomba izindlela ezicashile, ezihlukile, nezilula zokubhekana nokungaboni ngaso linye emshadweni.
Uma ungavumelani nomunye umuntu, ungamane uphume uphume; kuzoqhubeka kuphela ukubhebhethekisa ukungaboni ngaso linye emshadweni, futhi umphumela awusoze waba muhle.
Esikhundleni salokho, khani izindlela ezintsha zokuxhumana, ezikhiqizayo ngokungavumelani kwenu emshadweni futhi nijabulele ubudlelwano obujabulisayo.
Kulesi sihloko, sinemibono ezonikeza usizo olufanele emibhangqwaneni yokuthi ingaxhumana kanjani kangcono noshade naye nokuthi ingabhekana kanjani nokungaboni ngaso linye ebudlelwaneni.
1. Lalelisisa
Kwesinye isikhathi, lapho omunye umlingani eqala ukwabelana kakhulu, ungazithola uzibuza, "uzoyeka nini ukukhuluma ukuze ngikutshele engikucabangayo?"
Lapho umlingani eseqedile, awukaze uzwe noma yini okufanele bayisho noma benze ngaphakathi lokho abebekusho.
Ukuzwa nje (nokungaqondi) akulaleli umlingani wakho.
Uma ulalela ngempela, ubeka ngaphakathi incazelo, uqonda ukuthi yini abafuna ukuyidlulisa, bese unikeza imicabango / izeluleko zakho odabeni.
Kumele unake kakhulu izinto ezincane ezinjengolimi lomzimba nethoni njengoba zilawula imizwa kazakwenu nokuthi bacabangani okwamanje.
Ukukhombisa ukuthi ulalele kungenye indlela yokwenza ngcono ukuxhumana.
2. Lawula ukugxekwa
Kufanele ufunde ukuthi ungavumelani kanjani ngenhlonipho.
Lapho ninokungezwani emshadweni, yenzani imizamo yokugwema ukuhlaselwa nokugxekwa. Gwema ukubeka phansi, ukuhlambalaza, nokukhuluma kabi komzimba, njengokukhishwa kwamehlo.
Esikhundleni salokho, gcina ulimi lwakho nezwi lakho limnene. Isibonelo: "Sthandwa, lowo ngumbono onentshisekelo, kepha ngicabanga ukuthi ....." noma "Ungaphinda ungabele lokho, angikutholanga ..."
Ngokukhetha kokuqala, unikeza umlingani wakho ithuba lokuxoxa ngokuthi kungani becabanga lokho nokuthi yini okulethile lowo mbono othile.
Enketho yesibili, unikeza umlingani wakho ithuba lokucabanga kabusha umbono wabo futhi abone iphutha labo ngaphambi kokunikeza impendulo yakho.
Ngalokho, unciphisa ukungavumelani emshadweni, wazi ukuthi ingqondo yomlingani wakho isebenza kanjani, futhi ekugcineni, uthuthukise ukuqonda kwakho komunye nomunye.
Ukugxekwa kwenza abantu bazizwe bezivikela futhi kunciphisa nenqubo yokulalela, okungaholela ekukhuphukeni kwentukuthelo nemizwa elimele.
3. Namathela esihlokweni
Ukugwema ukungaboni ngaso linye emshadweni, hlala okwamanje, bese unamathela esihlokweni osesiseduze. Kungaba ukuhlakanipha okukhulu ukuletha izingqinamba ezindala futhi ezingahlobene ngokuphelele engxoxweni. Izokwengeza uphethiloli kuphela ekuchitheni izinto.
Ngakho-ke ungaxhumana kanjani noshade naye lapho ninokungezwani emshadweni?
Phakamisa ukuqeda ingxoxo ngokuhamba kwesikhathi, ikakhulukazi uma uzizwa ukhathele, ukhungathekile futhi kubonakala sengathi awukwazi ukuphetha. Ukuzinika isikhathi kuzonisiza nobabili nibe nombono omusha futhi nixoxe ngezinto ngokuvuthwa.
Khumbula, kufanele nixoxe ngesihloko esisodwa ngesikhathi futhi nihlale nihlonipha ikhono lomunye nomunye lokuzibandakanya nokuzinikela engxoxweni.
4. Vumela ngezinye izikhathi
Akunasizathu sokuphikisana ngokungapheli ngokuthi ngubani olungile noma ongalungile ngesikhathi sokungezwani emshadweni. Ukulungiswa ngalokhu kuhlukumeza ubuhlobo njalo.
Uma ukuba 'olungile' kubaluleke kakhulu kunokukhuluma ngothando noshade naye, usuke uvumela inkinga ukuthi ilahleke empini yamandla.
Khumbula, ukuba ngumuntu omkhulu kwesinye isikhathi nokuyekethisa kanye ngezikhathi ezithile kuzosiza kuphela ubudlelwano bakho.
Bheka futhi: Kungani kulungile ukuyekethisa othandweni.
5. Ungagxili kuwe kuphela
Lapho sinokuthile okuphawuleka kakhulu ezimpilweni zethu, sithola lesi sifiso esingokwemvelo sokuhlanganyela izindaba ezinjalo nokuhlangenwe nakho nabathandekayo bethu.
Kulindeleke ukuthi kucindezelwe; kodwa-ke, phakathi kwaleyo njabulo, sivame ukugxila kakhulu kithina futhi singanaki ukubuza ozakwethu noma yimiphi imibuzo noma silalele abakushoyo.
Impilo yomngane wakho ibaluleke njengaleyo yakho, ngakho-ke udinga ukuqiniseka ukuthi unezingxoxo nabo hhayi ukumane ukhulume ngawe.
Awudingi ukuthi ubuhlobo bakho buphele ngoba wena noshade naye anikwazanga ukuthola ukuthi nizokhuluma kanjani omunye nomunye.
Ukungezwani emshadweni kuzokwenzeka ngezikhathi ezithile, kepha into ebalulekile ukuthi usebenzisane nabo bese uthola ukuthi ungazilungisa kanjani uma kuvela izinkinga ezifanayo ngokuzayo.
Ukungaboni ngaso linye ebudlelwaneni nakanjani kuzokwenzeka, futhi ngeke uhlale ukwazi izindlela zokukuxazulula; kodwa-ke, into eyodwa ongayenza ukufunda ukuthi ungavumelani kanjani ngenhlonipho empikiswaneni.
Ngokusebenzisa lawa macebiso okuthi ungaxhumana kanjani emshadweni, uqinisekile ukuthi uzoletha indlela entsha endleleni enixhumana ngayo.
Ngokugxila ekukhulumisaneni ngenhlonipho, uzokwazi ukuphatha noma yikuphi ukungaboni ngaso linye emshadweni, uvuselele ubungani bakho, uthole ukusondelana okwandayo, futhi wakhe isibopho esiqinile sokuthembana noshade naye.