-Delile
- Ukuhloniphana
- Ukwethemba
- Ukusekela
- Ukwethembeka
- Umuzwa wobulungiswa
- Ubunikazi obuhlukile
- Ukukhulumisana okuhle
Uma ngicabanga ngegama elinempilo, ngicabanga ngesimo senhlalakahle; into esebenza njengokufanele ukuthi ibe yiyo; ukukhula nokukhula kahle; futhi ngiqinisekile ukuthi ungangeza izincazelo eziningi futhi.
Ngizofingqa "ubudlelwano obunempilo" ngokusho ukuthi buyibo into ekhulayo, ethuthukayo, futhi isebenze ngendlela eyenzelwe ngayo.
Ngake ngezwa othile ethi "ukwakha ubudlelwano" are "abantu ababili abangazwana emkhunjini baqonde endaweni efanayo, ”Ngakho-ke nansi incazelo yami ephelele yobudlelwano obunempilo.
Abantu ababili abangazwana, babheke endaweni efanayo, ngenkathi bekhula, bekhula futhi bekhula ndawonye ngendlela ethuthukisa ikhwalithi nesimo sempilo yomunye nomunye. (wow, leyo yincazelo ende yobudlelwano obunempilo)
Izinkinobho eziyisikhombisa zobudlelwano obunempilo
Kunokhiye abayisikhombisa engibatholile mathupha abasebenzisana ukwakha ubudlelwano obunempilo ezimpilweni zethu.
Ubudlelwano obunempilo buqukethe:
- Ukuhloniphana
- Ukwethemba
- Ukwethembeka
- Ukusekela
- Ubulungiswa
- Ubunikazi obuhlukile
- Ukukhulumisana okuhle
Ukuhloniphana
Uma uthando luyizindlela ezimbili, "uyapha futhi wamukele", injalo nenhlonipho.
Kunezikhathi lapho ngicabanga ukuthi umkami angakhathazeka ngezinto ezingasho lutho, ezingasho lutho ebudlelwaneni bethu obunempilo.
Izinto ezinjengokuthi “yikuphi kulawa mabhuluzi ama-5 abukeka kangcono ngalesi siketi?”, Ngesikhathi lapho sesivele siphuzile ukuqokwa kwethu. Okwamanje ngizocabanga ukuthi “Vele ukhethe okukodwa” kodwa ngenxa yenhlonipho bengingathi, “obomvu uncoma isitayela sakho sezinwele, hamba naleso (usafaka okuluhlaza okwesibhakabhaka).
Iqiniso ukuthi, sonke sinomuzwa wokuthi imizwa, imibono, ukukhathalela kanye nokusabela komunye umuntu kwesinye isikhathi kuyisilima, ngiyaqiniseka ukuthi umkami uzizwa ngendlela efanayo ngamanye ami kodwa, thina hloniphanani kwanele ukwamukela imiqondo yethu ehlukile nemikhuba yethu, ngaphandle kokudelela, ukuthukana nokungacabangi ngemizwa yomunye nomunye.
Ukwethemba
Into okungaba nzima ukuyizuza futhi ilahleke kalula. Esinye sezinyathelo ebudlelwaneni obunempilo ukwakha nokugcina ukwethembana okungenakunyakaziswa phakathi kwabalingani.
Ngenxa yokuthi iningi lethu liye lalimala, laphathwa kabi, laphathwa kabi, laba nobudlelwano obubi, noma labona ukuthi umhlaba ungaba nonya kanjani ngezinye izikhathi, ukuthembela kwethu akulula noma kushibhile.
Kwabaningi bethu, ukwethenjwa kwethu akutholakali ngamazwi kuphela kodwa, ngokuzihlola kaninginingi.
Kufanele kube nezinga elithile lokwethembana kubo bonke ubudlelwano ukuze bakhule bephilile futhi basebenze.
Uma umkami ehamba nabangane futhi ehlala sekwephuzile, ngingavumela ingqondo yami ukuthi igcwale imibuzo eminingi engaphazamisa ukuthula kwami futhi ingifake esimweni esibi ngokweqile lapho ebuya. Ngabe uhlangane nomunye umuntu ngenkathi esephumile? Ingabe umngani wakhe usemfihlakalweni yakhe?
Ngenkathi ngingaqala ukungamethembi ngaphandle kwesizathu futhi ngikhulise ukungavikeleki kwami, ngikhetha ukungakwenzi.
Kumele ngibe ngivuthiwe ngokwanele ukuthi ngethembe ukuthi uzogcina ukuzibophezela kwakhe kimi noma ngabe sindawonye noma sihlukene, futhi ngimnike igumbi lakhe ukuthi likhule ngaphandle kokufaka ubuhlobo bethu emibonweni yami nasekwesabeni kwami ngaphandle kokuthi anginike ubufakazi obungenakuphikwa bokuthi angimethembi.
Ngenxa yokwethembana, ubudlelwano bethu buvulekile, bukhululekile, buyaqina futhi bunothando ngisho nangemva kweminyaka eyi-10.
Ukusekela
Ukusekelwa kungavela ngezindlela eziningi futhi kubanzi kakhulu ukungena engxoxweni egcwele lapha kepha, kukhona ukusekelwa okungokomzwelo, ukwesekwa ngokomzimba, ukwesekwa kwengqondo, ukwesekwa ngokomoya, ukwesekwa ngokwezimali njll.
Ubudlelwano obunempilo bukhiqiza indawo efudumele futhi esekelanayo lapho singaziqabula khona futhi sithole amandla okuqhubeka usuku nosuku. Ngokwesibonelo;
Ngezinye izinsuku uLonnie wayebuya esikoleni ekhathele ngokuphelele ngemuva kosuku olukhathazayo lokufundisa. Ngivamise ukubuza ukuthi, “belunjani usuku lwakho ?,” obekungadala ukuqhuma okukhulu kokukhathazeka, ukukhungatheka nezinkinga ezenzeke emini.
Lokhu kuzoqhubeka isikhashana njengoba ngimane ngilalele ngenkathi uLonnie ekhipha imizwa yakhe egcinwe kusuka osukwini lwakhe ngaphandle kokugxeka noma ukwahlulela.
Ngemuva kokuba eseqedile ngivame ukumqinisekisa ukuthi unguthisha onekhono futhi wenza umsebenzi omuhle nezingane okubonakala sengathi kwehlisa ingqondo yakhe.
Siyasekelana ngezindlela eziningi ezisisiza ukuba sikhule futhi sobabili sizuze ngokuba sebudlelwaneni kanye nengxenye yempilo yomunye nomunye.
Lokhu kudala ukuthi sisondelane futhi kubhebhethekise umlilo wothando lwethu ngomunye nomunye.
Ukwethembeka
Ukukhula kwethu njengezingane sasivame ukuthi, "ukwethembeka kuyinqubomgomo ehamba phambili," kepha njengabantu abadala, sonke sifunde ukufihla iqiniso. Noma ngabe kwenzelwa ukonga ubuso, ukukhulisa amamaki wenzuzo, ukuvelela emisebenzini, ukugwema izingxabano, sonke silahlekelwe ukuthembeka ebesinakho sisengabantwana.
Kunengxenye ebhayisikobho ethi “A Few Men Good” lapho umlingiswa kaJack Nicholas ngesikhathi kuqulwa icala athi, “Iqiniso, awukwazi ukuphatha iqiniso.”
Kwesinye isikhathi sonke sizizwa sengathi omunye umuntu othembeke kuye, akakwazi ukubhekana nalokho okwenzekile. Ngakho-ke, sihlala sithule kuze kube yilapho bethola kamuva futhi imiphumela iba mibi kakhulu.
Enye yezinto zobudlelwano obunempilo ubuqotho noma ukwethembeka. Kufanele kube nezinga elithile lokwethembeka, ngaphandle kwalapho ubuhlobo bungasebenzi khona.
Ngikholwa ukuthi ukwethembeka ebudlelwaneni ukuthembeka kuwe nakomunye umuntu ozinikele ngesikhathi sakho, amandla nemizwelo yakho.
Ngenkathi singehluleka lokhu ngezikhathi ezithile, senza konke okusemandleni ukugcina lokhu phakathi komunye nomunye.
Umuzwa wobulungiswa
Mina nomkami sivame ukufika ekhaya ngesikhathi esifanayo ngqo njalo kusihlwa ngoba ukuya nokubuya emsebenzini kuyibanga elifanayo.
Sobabili sizobe sikhathele, silambile, ngandlela thile sicasukile ezimeni zosuku bese sifisa nje ukudla okushisayo nombhede ofudumele.
Manje, kungumsebenzi kabani ukulungisa isidlo sakusihlwa nokwenza imisebenzi yasendlini?
Amanye amadoda kungenzeka athi, “kungumsebenzi wakhe, ungowesifazane nowesifazane okufanele banakekele ikhaya!” Abanye besifazane kungenzeka bathi, “kungumsebenzi wakho, nguwe indoda futhi indoda okufanele inakekele unkosikazi wayo!”
Nakhu engikushoyo.
Masibe nobulungiswa futhi sisizane sobabili.
Kungani? Hhayi-ke, sobabili siyasebenza, sobabili siyazikhokha izikweletu, sobabili sinqume ukungayiqashwa intombazane, futhi sobabili sikhathele ekupheleni kosuku. Uma ngifuna ngobuhlobo ubudlelwane bethu bukhule bunempilo, akufanele yini thina sobabili senze lo msebenzi?
Ngiyaqiniseka ngokuphelele ukuthi impendulo inguyebo futhi ngikufakazisile kuyiqiniso eminyakeni edlule.
Yebo, ngazama enye indlela, kepha ngaso sonke isikhathi ibishiya ubudlelwano bucindezela, bukhungathekisa futhi buphazamisa ukuxhumana kwethu ngakho-ke nakhu ukukhetha. Singakhetha ukungakhethi ezindabeni ezihlobene nobudlelwano futhi sibe nokukhula okunempilo okukhulayo noma ungabi nabulungiswa bese ugcina uwedwa.
Ubunikazi obuhlukile
UConrad, bengicabanga ukuthi sifuna ukuba munye ebudlelwaneni bethu, ukwahlukanisa ubunikazi bethu kungasiza kanjani ekwakheni ubudlelwano obunempilo?
Ngiyajabula ukuthi ubuzile.
Lokho esivame ukukwenza ebudlelwaneni ukuzama kanzima ukufanisa ubunikazi bethu nomuntu esinaye size sizilahle thina. Lokhu okwenzayo kusenza sithembele kakhulu kubo ngayo yonke into kusuka ekusekelweni ngokomzwelo phansi, kuya kosizo lwengqondo.
Lokhu kubeka ubunzima ebudlelwaneni futhi kudonsa impilo yomunye umuntu ngokuncela imizwa yabo, isikhathi, nokunye. lobu budlelwano futhi abukwazi ukuqhubeka noma ngabe abusebenzi.
Sonke sihluke ngezindlela eziningi futhi umehluko wethu yikho okwenza ngamunye ahluke.
Kholwa noma ungakukholwa, lokhu kwehlukana yikho empeleni okudonsela abalingani bethu kithi; ucabanga ukuthi kwenzekani lapho siqala ukufana nabo? Elula, baba nesithukuthezi bese beqhubeka.
Kumele uthande futhi wazise ukuthi ungubani ngaphambi kokuba noma ngubani azokwazisa futhi akuthande.
Ungulokho obekufanele ube yikho, ngakho-ke gcina ubunikazi bakho, yilabo abakuthakaselayo abakufunelayo. Imibono ehlukene, umbono njll.
Ukukhulumisana okuhle
Kuyahlekisa ngempela ukuthi simane sisho kanjani amagama ezindlebeni zabanye futhi sikubize njengokuxhumana. Ukuxhumana kusho ukulalela, ukuqonda, nokuphendula.
Buka futhi:
Kuyamangaza ukuthi amagama ahlukile asho izinto ezihlukile kubantu abahlukile. Ungatshela umlingani wakho okuthile futhi usho into eyodwa ngenkathi bezwa futhi beqonda okuthile okuhluke ngokuphelele.
Esivame ukukwenza ekuxhumaneni ukulalela ngenkathi omunye umuntu ekhulumela isikhala sokugxumela sinikeze imibono yethu kanye nokuhlola isimo.
Lokhu akukhona ukuxhumana kweqiniso.
Ukuxhumana kwangempela kunoma yibuphi ubudlelwano kubandakanya umuntu oyedwa obhekana nodaba oluthile ngenkathi elinye iqembu lilalela kuze kube yilapho iqembu lokuqala liqede ngokuphelele, khona-ke iqembu lesibili liphinda lokho obekuzwelwa ukucaciselwa nokuqondwa ngaphambi kokuba liphendule leyo nkinga ethile.