-Delile
- Kuyini ukwelashwa kwezithandani ezigxile ngokomoya?
- Yenzelwe bani i-EFT?
- Izinyathelo eziyisishiyagalolunye zokwelashwa kwezithandani ezigxile ngokomoya
- 1. Iziphi izinkinga ezakuholela ku-EFT?
- 2. Thola izindawo ezinenkinga
- 3. Thola imizwa yomunye nomunye
- 4. Izingqinamba ezenziwa kabusha
- 5. Qonda izidingo zomuntu ngamunye
- 6. Yamukela futhi uphromothe ulwazi lomuntu oshade naye
- 7. Hlela kabusha ukuxhumana nokuphendula
- 8. Ukuxazulula izinkinga
- 9. Dala imikhuba emisha
- Ukwelashwa kwemibhangqwana egxile ngokomzwelo kuthatha isikhathi esingakanani kusebenza?
Ukwelashwa kwezithandani ezigxile ngokomzwelo, kwesinye isikhathi okubizwa ngokuthi ukwelashwa kwemibhangqwana ye-EFT, kuyindlela eyenzelwe ukuhlela kabusha izimpendulo ezingokomzwelo ukuze kube nokuqina okuqinile kwezothando. Imayelana nokwenza ubudlelwane ichweba eliphephile, esikhundleni senkundla yempi.
Ukwelashwa kwe-EFT noma ukwelashwa okugxile emoyeni kungazwakala njengegama elisha, kepha bekulokhu kukhona kusukela ngawo-1980.
Ucwaningo luphakamisa ukuthi imibhangqwana ethole ukwelashwa kwezithandani ezigxile ngokomzwelo yaba nezinga lempumelelo elingu-70-75% ekususeni ubudlelwano kusuka esimweni sokucindezeleka kuya ekululameni ngokomzwelo.
Uma ufuna ukuthuthukisa ukuxhumana kwakho, qonda umlingani wakho kangcono, futhi uqinise umshado wakho, ukwelashwa kwezithandani ezigxile ngokomoya kungaba yindlela ekufanele.
Kuyini ukwelashwa kwezithandani ezigxile ngokomoya?
Kusukela ngawo-1980, uLes Greenberg noSue Johnson baqala ukusebenzisa ukwelashwa kwemibhangqwana egxile ngokomzwelo ukusiza imishado egulayo, bekholelwa ukuthi ukuncipha ekuxhumaneni ngokomzwelo phakathi kwabalingani kwakuyingxenye ebalulekile yenqubo yokuphulukisa.
Ngesikhathi sokwelashwa kwemibhangqwana egxile ngokomzwelo, imibhangqwana izofunda ukwazi imizwa yayo, ifunde ukuveza imizwa yayo, ilawule imizwa yayo, ibonakalise, iguqule futhi yakhe amava amasha okuhlangana nabalingani bawo.
Kalula nje, ukwelashwa kwemibhangqwana egxile ngokomzwelo kugxile ekulungiseni kahle izindlela zokuxhumana ezingezinhle futhi kugcizelela ukubaluleka kokunamathiselwa kokuxhuma nokwakha ukwethembana emshadweni.
Ukwelashwa kwezithandani ezigxile ngokomzwelo nakho kugxila kakhulu ekuzishintsheni.
Yenzelwe bani i-EFT?
Ukwelashwa kwemibhangqwana egxile ngokomzwelo kwenzelwe abalingani ososizini. Lokhu kucindezeleka kungafaka oyedwa noma abalingani abaningi ebudlelwaneni abangathembekile, abane-PTSD, ukudangala, ukugula okungalapheki, ukuhlukunyezwa ebuntwaneni, noma ukukhombisa izimpawu zamanje zokuziphatha okuhlukumezayo.
Izinyathelo eziyisishiyagalolunye zokwelashwa kwezithandani ezigxile ngokomoya
Inhloso yokwelashwa okugxile ngokomzwelo ukudala indawo enhle yezothando nokusebenzisa izivivinyo zokuhlanganisa ukuhlanganisa imibhangqwana. Kunezinyathelo eziyisishiyagalolunye zokwelashwa ezigxile ngokomzwelo umuntu ngamunye azodlula kuzo.
Lezi zinyathelo zehlukaniswe zaba izingxenye ezintathu.
Ingxenye yokuqala ngukuzinza, eyenzelwe ukukhomba izinkinga eziyinhloko zombhangqwana ebudlelwaneni. Okwesibili inqubo yokuxhuma kabusha, ezosiza imibhangqwana ukuba ibe nozwelo komunye nomunye futhi ifunde ukuxhumana.
Isigaba sesithathu ukubuyiselwa, okudala imijikelezo emisha yokuziphatha, izindlela zokubhekana nezinkinga, futhi kudala amava amahle imibhangqwana okufanele igxile kuyo.
Ngakho-ke, okulandelayo kunikezwa izinyathelo eziyisishiyagalolunye ezisetshenziswa ekwelashweni okugxile ngokomoya kwabashadikazi.
1. Iziphi izinkinga ezakuholela ku-EFT?
Yini eyenzekile ekulethele ukwelulekwa ngokwengqondo? Imibhangqwana kufanele iqinisekise ukuthi yiziphi izingqinamba ezibaholele ekwelashweni, okufana nebanga elingokomzwelo, ukuhlukumezeka kwengane okungena emaphethini abantu abadala, ukungathembeki, ukungabi nokukhulumisana, nokuningi.
2. Thola izindawo ezinenkinga
Ngokufana nokwazi ukuthi yini ekulethe ku-EFT yemibhangqwana, ukukhomba izindawo eziyinkinga ebudlelwaneni bakho kuzosiza ukukhomba ukuthi kungani unokuxhumana okungalungile nomlingani wakho.
Ukwazi ukuthi iyiphi inkinga esemqoka okuholele ekutheni ufune ukwelashwa kuzokusiza wena, umlingani wakho, kanye nomeluleki wakho noma umelaphi we-EFT ukuqonda kangcono ukuthi yini ebangela ukucindezeleka nendlela engcono yokuphulukisa kuyo.
3. Thola imizwa yomunye nomunye
Le yingxenye yenqubo yokuxhuma kabusha ekwelashweni kwezithandani ezigxile ngokomoya. Ukuba nozwela kumlingani wakho kuzokusiza ukuthi ubone uhlangothi lwabo lwezinto futhi uqonde ukuthi kungani besabela ezintweni ngendlela abazenza ngayo.
Umelaphi wakho angakusiza futhi nobabili ukuthi nithole imizwa efihliwe edala uqhekeko ebudlelwaneni benu ngokusebenzisa izindlela zokwelapha ezigxile emizwelweni.
4. Izingqinamba ezenziwa kabusha
Ngokukhomba imizwa ebingakaze yamukelwe nezidingo zokunamathiselwa, imibhangqwana izokwazi ukuhlela kabusha impendulo yabo engokomzwelo.
5. Qonda izidingo zomuntu ngamunye
Lesi yisinyathelo sokuqala esigabeni sokwakhiwa kabusha kwe-EFT. Manje njengoba imibhangqwana isiqonda kangcono umlingani wayo, sekuyisikhathi sokuthola okufunayo nezidingo zayo ebudlelwaneni. Lapho abantu bezazi kangcono, kuzoba lula ukuveza izifiso zabo kumlingani wabo.
6. Yamukela futhi uphromothe ulwazi lomuntu oshade naye
Imibhangqwana izokhuthazwa ukwamukela okwehlele abalingani babo nezinguquko ekuziphatheni kwabo. Lesi yisinyathelo esibalulekile ngoba ubudlelwane bezenhlalo buxhumene ngqo nempilo yomuntu engokomzwelo.
Olunye ucwaningo lukhombisile ukuthi imibhangqwana edabule i-EFT yehliswe kakhulu “ekuphenduleni okusongelayo” kobuchopho lapho kukhona abalingani bayo. Ngokuyinhloko, lapho imizwa emihle ihlotshaniswa nabalingani bethu abathandanayo, sibuthatha lobo budlelwano njengendawo ephephile engokomzwelo, engokomzimba nengqondo.
7. Hlela kabusha ukuxhumana nokuphendula
Esigabeni sokugcina sesigaba sokwakhiwa kabusha, imibhangqwana izokhuthazwa ukwamukela izidingo nezidingo zabalingani babo, kanye nokuzwakalisa okwabo.
Ukusuka kuleli phuzu, imibhangqwana izofunda ukushintsha ukuxhumana kwayo futhi imise isimilo sayo esidala ekungeneleni ebudlelwaneni.
8. Ukuxazulula izinkinga
Esigabeni sokuqala sesigaba sokuhlanganisa nokuhlanganisa, imibhangqwana izofundiswa ukuxhumana, ukubhekana nezinkinga, ukuxazulula izinkinga, nokuzwakalisa ulaka ngendlela enempilo.
Lesi sinyathelo sisiza imibhangqwana ukuthi ikhombe izixazululo ezintsha zezinkinga ezibalethe ekwelashweni kwasekuqaleni.
Lokhu ngeke kusize kuphela imibhangqwana ukuthi ixhumane ngempumelelo, kodwa futhi kuzosiza ukuvimbela izinkinga ezindala ukuthi zingakhuli. Esikhundleni sokubambelela entukuthelweni, imibhangqwana izokwazi ukubhekana ngqo nezinselelo zayo njengobambiswano, hhayi izitha.
9. Dala imikhuba emisha
Ngokungenelela kokwelapha okugxile emoyeni kanye nezindlela zokweluleka imibhangqwana eminingi, imibhangqwana izophinde ikhuthazwe ukudala amava amasha ndawonye.
Amasu wokwelapha imibhangqwana mhlawumbe azofaka izabelo zomsebenzi wesikole noma ubusuku bosuku, ukusiza ukuhlobanisa imizwa emihle.
Lesi sigaba sizosiza futhi imibhangqwana ukuthi iguqule izimpendulo zayo zomzwelo komunye nomunye. Isibonelo salokhu kungaba yindoda noma unkosikazi ukusabela kwakhe kokuqala kokubi kungaba ukuhlasela nokuvikela. Ngemuva kwalesi sinyathelo, lowo muntu uzobe esehlela kabusha impendulo yakhe ekubeni nesineke futhi enengqondo.
Buka le vidiyo ukuthola eminye imininingwane nge-EFT:
Ukwelashwa kwemibhangqwana egxile ngokomzwelo kuthatha isikhathi esingakanani kusebenza?
Ngenkathi lezi zinyathelo eziyisishiyagalolunye zingazwakala zinzima ekuqaleni, imibhangqwana eminingi ayikho ku-EFT isikhathi eside. Ukhiye we-EFT ukuqonda omunye nomunye nokugxila ezinkulumweni ezintsha zomzwelo.
Lapho nje abalingani bekwazi ukukhombisa ukuzwelana futhi baqonde izingqinamba zabo eziyinhloko, bazobe besendleleni eya ekuphulukisweni.
Ucwaningo lukhombisa ukuthi kuze kufike kuma-90% emibhangqwana inokuthuthuka okuphawulekayo ebudlelwaneni bayo ngemuva kokuzama ukwelashwa kwemibhangqwana egxile ngokomzwelo.
Uma unomuzwa wokuthi wena nomlingani wakho ninenkinga yokuqondana futhi nidinga usizo lokuxhuma kabusha, ukwelashwa okugxile ngokomoya kungaba kwakho.