-Delile
Inkinga ejwayelekile ehlupha imibhangqwana eminingi ukwehluleka ukuxhumana ngempumelelo. Amasu wokuxhumana kunzima ukuwaqondisa futhi angaba yinkinga emibhangqwaneni ebhekana nezinselelo lapho izama ukuzwana.
Kepha ukungafundi amasu amasha wokuxhumana nomlingani wakho futhi ungavumi ukwehluka kungaba yingozi ebudlelwaneni bakho. Kunezikhubekiso eziningana zokukwazi ukuvula nokuxhumana okuhle nomlingani wakho. Ngezansi, bheka ezinye zezithiyo ezivame kakhulu nokuthi ungazinqoba kanjani.
Ukwesaba ukwaliwa
Cabanga ngokuthi uxoxa kanjani nabanye. Ingabe uvulekile, uthembekile, futhi uzimisele ukusho lokho okushoyo ngaphandle kokubheka ukuthi kungabhekwa kanjani? Noma ujwayele ukuzibamba futhi wesabe ukukhuluma okucabangayo ngoba ukhathazekile ngokuthi abanye bazocabangani? Ukwesaba ukwenqatshwa kungalimaza ukuzimisela komlingani wakho ukwabelana ngemicimbi yabo yempilo noma izinselelo nothandekayo wabo. Yize kungahle kube okungenangqondo ukucabanga nokuzizwa ngale ndlela, kuyisithiyo sangempela nesiyiqiniso kwabanye. Yiba nomdlandla futhi ufunde izindlela umlingani wakho athanda ukuxhumana ngazo. Qinisekisa ukuthi ubudlelwano bakho buyindawo ephephile yokuvuleleka nokwethembeka; yindawo engenacala ekwahlulelweni noma ekucabangeni. Ngemuva kwalokho sebenzisa lezo zibopho!
Ubudlelwano obudlule
Abanye besaba imiphumela yokuvulwa ngenxa yamaphethini ebudlelwaneni obudlule. Ungahle ube nomuntu omusha, umuntu onendlela eyingqayizivele yokukhuluma nokwabelana ngemizwa noma imizwa yabo. Kepha izinkinga zakudala zithanda ukukhulisa amakhanda azo amabi futhi zakhe umuzwa wokungabaza nokugcina imfihlo ebudlelwaneni. Uma uzizwa unamahloni ngokwabelana ngokukhululekile nomlingani wakho ngenxa yokulimala okudlule noma amahloni, khuluma nomuntu omthandayo! Uma umlingani wakho ekuthanda ngokweqiniso futhi ekhathalela ngawe, le ngxoxo kungenzeka ukuthi ibe lula. Kufanele uzizwe uvikelekile ebudlelwaneni futhi uzizwe sengathi unezwi. Ungavumeli ukwesaba okwedlule kukuvimbele ekubeni nenjabulo yobudlelwano okwamanje.
Umehluko kuzitayela zokuxhumana
Indlela esikhulumisana ngayo ingenye yezimpawu ezihluke kakhulu zobuntu. Izitayela zokuxhumana eziyinkimbinkimbi zifaka umehluko ekubukekeni kobuso, izindawo, ulimi lomzimba, imisindo yezwi, ukukhetha amagama, nesikhathi. Lokhu kwehlukahluka emaphethini wokuxhumana kungavimbela ukuvuleleka phakathi kwabalingani ngokungavumeli umuntu ngamunye ukuthi ahlanganyele ngokuphelele nomunye. Uma ukuqhathanisa kwehluka ngokwanele, kungaba nzima ngabashadikazi ukuthola okuvumelana nabo kanye nokukwazi ukukhuluma ngokucacile ngemizwa nemizwa yabo. Izitayela zingahluka kusuka kunolaka noma ukuxabana kuya kwesaba noma kokuqina. Uma wena nomlingani wakho ninokwehluka okuphawulekayo endleleni ohlanganyela ngayo impilo yakho nabanye ngamazwi, kuhle ukuba nengxoxo ngezidingo nalokho okufunayo ekukhulumisaneni ukuze uzwe sengathi ubudlelwano buyindawo ephephile yokuba uvule futhi uthembeke.
Ukungqubuzana
Imibhangqwana eminingi ihlushwa ukungavuleki ngoba oyedwa noma bobabili abalingani bayesaba izingxabano. Njeng izitayela zokuxhumana, izindlela abantu abakhetha ukukhipha izinkinga zingahluka kakhulu. Abanye bakhetha ukuhlangabezana nokungavumelani ngqo bese bexazulula izinkinga ngokubhekana nokuxoxisana. Abanye bangasuka empikiswaneni babuye emuva kwesikhathi ngemuva kokucabanga ngezinkinga okunengqondo. Abanye, noma kunjalo, banamahloni kakhulu futhi bangathanda ukungakunaki ukungqubuzana ngokuphelele bese bezama ukuthola isixazululo ngaphandle kwengxoxo noma ingxabano. Uyazi ukuthi yini indlela yakho eyinhloko yokulwa? Kuthiwani ngomlingani wakho? Uma uthola ukuthi bahluke kakhulu, kungaba ukuhlakanipha ukusungula "imithetho yokushayisana" ukuze wakhe indawo ephephile kubo bobabili abalingani ukuthi bazizwe sengathi izwi labo lizwakala futhi lamukelwe.
Ukungazethembi
Ukuzethemba okuphansi empilweni yakho yangasese kungahle kuholele ekungathembekini nasekunciphiseni ulwazi olwabiwe phakathi kwabalingani ebudlelwaneni. Ukuzethemba okuphansi noma ukuzethemba, ngokuvamile ukukhuluma, ukungakwazi ukuzizwa uvikelekile futhi uvikelekile esikhunjeni sakho. Kungakwenza uzizwe ungakhululekile endaweni yakho noma ungakhululeki ukuthi ungubani. Lolu hlobo lokuzicabanga olubi lungaba nomthelela omkhulu ekhonweni lakho nasekuzimiseleni kokukhuluma ngokukhululekile nomunye wakho obalulekile ngemicimbi yokuphila noma ukukhathazeka. Akukho ukulungiswa okulula kokuzethemba okuphansi; kudinga ukuzibophezela ukuze ushintshe indlela ocabanga ngayo ngawe. Elinye lamathuluzi asebenza kakhulu “kubhokisi lamathuluzi” lakho, noma kunjalo, ngumuntu okuthanda kakhulu. Uma ufisa ukushintsha isithombe sakho futhi, futhi, nendlela oxhumana ngayo nomlingani wakho, impahla yakho ebaluleke kakhulu ukuncika ekusekelweni onakho nomlingani wakho eceleni kwakho.
Yize kungekho kulezi zikhubekiso zizodwa ezichaza ubunzima abanye abantu abanabo ngokuvulela abantu ababathandayo nababethemba kakhulu, bayindawo enhle yokuqala. Linganisa lapho ukwazi khona ukuxhumana nomlingani wakho noma umlingani wakho bese ubukeza ukuthi yiziphi izingqinamba ezingaba khona ezivimbela omunye wenu ekuvulekeni komunye.