-Delile
- Incazelo yomona
- Izimpawu zomona ebudlelwaneni
- 1. Ukuhlola kuwe kaninginingi
- 2. Ukulandela eduze
- 3. Uyathukuthela lapho wenza okuthile ngaphandle kwabo
- 4. Ukungenelela kumbuthano wakho womphakathi
- 5. Ukubuza ubungani bakho nabanye abantu
- 7. Ngikutshela ukuthi ugqoka kanjani
- 8. Ungakuboni okuhle kuwe
- 9. Ukukuqhatha
- 10. Ukuqhayisa lapho usho omunye umuntu
- 11. Ukukusola ngokukopela
- 12. Kukudikibalisa ekuphumeni
- 13. Ukulawula indlela oziphatha ngayo
- 14. Ukwenza uzichaze
- 15. Ukuthukuthela lapho uncoma abanye
- 16. Ukufuna ukwazi ngokudlula kwakho
- Izinyathelo lapho ubhekene nomlingani wakho onomona
- 1. Qala ingxoxo ngomoya ophansi
- 2. Veza indlela ozizwa ngayo
- 3. Cela ukuthi bashintshe
- 4. Banikeze ithuba lokukhuluma
- 5. Vuma impendulo yabo noma ushiye
- Isiphetho
Ngokuvamile, abantu babheka izimpawu zesikhwele ebudlelwaneni njengezingenangozi ngoba abantu abaningi abathandi ukubhekana nosongo ebudlelwaneni babo.
Ngenkathi izimpawu zomona ebudlelwaneni kungeyona into enkulu ekuqaleni, kubalulekile ukuthi ubheke umona owedlulele ebudlelwaneni. Ungakhombisa ukungenami kwakho lapho umlingani wakho ethanda ukuba nabanye abantu noma ngabe useduze noma uma bebazisa kakhulu.
Kodwa-ke, umona ongenampilo ngezinto ezingasho lutho awamukeleki njengoba ungabhubhisa ubudlelwano benu. Ngokocwaningo, umona ungenye yezimpawu ezihamba phambili zodlame lwasekhaya. Yize lokho kungasho ukuthi ubuhlobo bomona buhlale buyingozi, kusho ukuthi umhawu owedlulele ungabuqeda ubudlelwano bakho.
Ngakho-ke, kusho ukuthini umhawu ebudlelwaneni?
Incazelo yomona
Umona umuzwa wokuthukuthela noma ukucasuka lapho othile ecabanga ukuthi omunye umuntu uzama ukuthola ukunakwa kwesithandwa sakhe noma umlingani wakhe. Abantu basebenzisa umona nomona ngokushintshana ukuze basho isifiso somuntu esinamandla sokuthola lokho omunye umuntu anakho. Noma kunjalo, la magama amabili ahlukile.
Umona wumuzwa wentukuthelo owakheka lapho ufuna izinto zomunye umuntu noma izimfanelo zakhe. Ngokuphambene nalokho, umhawu ukulawula okufisa ukuba nakho phezu kokuthile noma kothile osekuvele kungokwakho. Kuyindlela yokuvikela okunamathiselwe kwakho noma ukukhombisa ukubusa okuphelele komunye umuntu noma okuthile.
Izazi zokusebenza kwengqondo ziye zafunda umehluko phakathi kwezimpawu zomona nomona ukwehlukanisa phakathi kwezimbangela zazo nokuthi zikuthinta kanjani ukuziphatha. Umona wenza abantu bafise izinto nezimfanelo zabanye abantu. Kodwa-ke, umona ubenza bangazethembi ngokuthile noma ngomunye umuntu osevele ekhona empilweni yabo.
Izimpawu zomona ebudlelwaneni
Lapho umuntu esebudlelwaneni, kungaba nzima ukusho ukuthi umona usuyindawo ekhathazayo yini.
Uma usola izimpawu zesikhwele ebudlelwaneni obukubo, futhi ungathanda ukwazi ukuthi ungazibona kanjani, bheka lezi zimpawu eziyi-15 zomona wobudlelwano:
1. Ukuhlola kuwe kaninginingi
Ungabona uma umuntu enomona ngokubheka ukuthi ukubheka kangaki. Ukuthola imibhalo noma izingcingo ezimbalwa kusho ukuthi umlingani wakho uyayikhathalela inhlalakahle yakho. Kepha lapho umlingani wakho efona ephindelela, ikakhulukazi uma uphume nabangane, kuyisibonakaliso esihle somona ebudlelwaneni.
Ukuxhumana kubaluleke kakhulu kunoma yibuphi ubuhlobo, kepha ucwaningo lukhombisile ukuthi ukusebenzisa ubuchwepheshe ukuxhumana njalo nomlingani wakho kunganciphisa ukwaneliseka kobudlelwano kakhulu.
2. Ukulandela eduze
Ukulandela umlingani wakho emicimbini kuyindlela enhle yokwakha isibopho esiqinile.
Kodwa-ke, lapho umlingani wakho ezwa isidingo sokukulandela yonke indawo noma ethukuthele lapho ubatshela ukuthi abasale, kuyisibonakaliso somhawu wobudlelwano. Imibhangqwana iyasizakala ngokunikezana isikhala, ngoba kuyabasiza ukuthi bagweme ukuzilahlekisela ebudlelwaneni.
3. Uyathukuthela lapho wenza okuthile ngaphandle kwabo
Ukuchitha isikhathi esibalulekile nomlingani wakho kuyindlela yokuqinisa ubudlelwano bakho nokwakha ubungani. Uma uhlukana nabo, kungahle kube sengathi kukhona okushodayo, okujwayelekile. Kepha uma umlingani wakho ethukuthela lapho wenza okuthile ngaphandle kwabo, kukhombisa umhawu owedlulele.
Imibhangqwana inezinto zokuzilibazisa ezihlukene lapho ijabulela khona isikhathi sami. Kusiza ubudlelwano obujabulisayo nobunempilo. Ukuqhuma lapho umlingani wakho ethatha isinqumo sokuzijabulisa nabangane babo noma kwenye indawo kukhombisa izimpawu zokuziphatha okunomona.
4. Ukungenelela kumbuthano wakho womphakathi
Enye yezimpawu zesikhwele ebudlelwaneni yilapho umlingani wakho ehlasela njalo imibuthano yakho yokuzijabulisa engaziwa.
Isibonelo, umlingani wakho angavele avele avele ephathini yomngani wakho, konke egameni lokukuhlola. Bangase futhi beme ngasemsebenzini wakho lapho usemhlanganweni.
5. Ukubuza ubungani bakho nabanye abantu
Ukubuza imibuzo ngabantu abasempilweni yozakwenu kujwayelekile njengoba kuyindlela yokubazi kangcono.
Kodwa-ke, lapho umlingani wakho efuna ukwazi konke ngobudlelwano bakho nabanye abantu, kuyisibonakaliso esikhathazayo somona. Ungamangali lapho bekubuza bezungeza ukuqinisekisa konke obatshele khona.
7. Ngikutshela ukuthi ugqoka kanjani
Lapho umlingani wakho ekugcizelela ngokuqinile ukuthi kufanele ugqoke ingubo ethile noma isitayela sezinwele, kuyisibonakaliso somhawu ebudlelwaneni.
Abantu banesithombe sokuthi bafuna umlingani wabo abukeke kanjani, kepha abakwazi ukufuna ngenkani. Ukwazi lapho ungadweba khona umugqa kubonisa ubuhlobo obunempilo.
8. Ungakuboni okuhle kuwe
Ezinye zezimpawu zomona ebudlelwaneni yilapho umlingani wakho ekubukela phansi futhi akwenze uzizwe umncane.
Esikhundleni sokukukhuthaza nokukusekela, bakunxenxa ukuthi ushiye iphrojekthi ngemuva futhi bakuphakamise umqondo ophansi ongawazama.
9. Ukukuqhatha
Esinye isibonakaliso sobukhwele bobudlelwano lapho umlingani wakho ekucathamela uma uphuma noma uku-akhawunti yakho yezokuxhumana.
Bangase basebenzise umuntu ukuze akubheke, angene kwi-akhawunti yakho, noma afune ukwazi ukuthi kungani unezingxoxo ezithile. Uma uqaphela ukulandela, kungumona ongenampilo.
Bheka le vidiyo engakusiza ukuthi ubone izimpawu zokulandela:
10. Ukuqhayisa lapho usho omunye umuntu
Uma uzibuze, "Umhawu uzizwa unjani?" bukela ukuthi umlingani wakho usabela kanjani uma usho ngokunganaki igama lomunye umuntu.
Bangahle bakuthukuthele noma bakubuze ngokuqhubekayo ukuze wazi ubudlelwano bakho nalo muntu noma ngabe lowo muntu kungumngani wakho noma osebenza naye emsebenzini.
11. Ukukusola ngokukopela
Ukumangalelwa ngokungeyikho kokukopela kungumvuthwandaba wazo zonke ezinye izimpawu zomhawu ebudlelwaneni.
Impela, kuyicala elijwayelekile elivela kumuntu onomona owedlulele. Ukudlala nomlingani wakho kuyinto ejwayelekile, kepha uma yonke ingxoxo izungeze wena ukukopela lapho inganembile, kufanele uqaphele kakhulu.
12. Kukudikibalisa ekuphumeni
Umona owedlulele uziveza lapho umlingani wakho ekuyekisa ukuphuma.
Umlingani onomona ufuna ukukubona eceleni kwabo ngaso sonke isikhathi, futhi bakhetha ukulwa okuncane noma kunini lapho unohambo. Impikiswano ingumphumela oqondile womhawu wabo osuselwa kumqondo ongavikelekile.
13. Ukulawula indlela oziphatha ngayo
Lapho umlingani wakho efuna ukuthi wenze ngendlela ethile, kungenye yezimpawu zomona ebudlelwaneni. Isibonelo, uma umlingani wakho ekutshela ukuthi umncome ezinkundleni zokuxhumana noma akutshele ukuthi uhlale ngemuva kwabo ngenkathi bexazulula izinkinga zakho, kuyimpawu ecacile yokuziphatha.
Uchwepheshe wezokwelapha uKamalyn Kaur uqaphele ukuthi ukulawula indlela yokuziphatha ebuhlotsheni kulimaza ukuzethemba komuntu olawulwayo kanye nokuphila kahle ngokomzwelo. Kungokuzuzisa wonke umuntu ukugwema lobo budlelwano.
14. Ukwenza uzichaze
Enye indlela yokubona umona kulapho umlingani wakho efuna imininingwane ngakho konke okwenzayo nabantu ohlangana nabo.
Isazi sezengqondo uSharon Martin uchaza imininingwane yokuthi ukuzithethelela, ukuphikisana, ukuzivikela nokuzichaza kwakho (i-JADE) kumaka amaphethini wokuxhumana obudlelwano obungenampilo obuthinta kabi lowo muntu nobudlelwano.
15. Ukuthukuthela lapho uncoma abanye
Uma ufuna ukubheka ukuthi umlingani wakho unomona noma cha, qaphela ukusabela kwabo lapho unikeza abanye ukuncoma okulula.
Ukwazisa abanye noma ngabe usebudlelwaneni akusho ukuthi uyakhohlisa. Lapho abalingani bakho bejikijela izincomo ezingenabungozi, abazethembi, bakhombisa izimpawu zokuziphatha okunomona.
16. Ukufuna ukwazi ngokudlula kwakho
Noma ubudlelwano bakho bangaphambilini bunendaba futhi, umlingani onezimpawu zomhawu ufuna ukwazi yonke imininingwane. Futhi uma uthi cha, bazothukuthela. Ukungazethembi kwabo kuqhuba isifiso sabo esikhula njalo sokufunda okwengeziwe ngokudlule kwakho njalo.
Izinyathelo lapho ubhekene nomlingani wakho onomona
Uma usenesifiso sokwenza ubudlelwano bakho busebenze, ungaqala izinguquko ezibhekana nalezi zimpawu zomhawu ebudlelwaneni.
Bheka izinyathelo ezilandelayo ukuxhumana nomlingani wakho mayelana nomona wabo obonakalayo:
1. Qala ingxoxo ngomoya ophansi
Qinisekisa ukuthi awenzi kubonakale sengathi banenkinga.
Esikhundleni salokho, yethule njengenkinga ongathanda ukuyixazulula ndawonye ukuqhubekisela phambili ubudlelwano. Kungasiza njengoba kungonga umlingani wakho ekuzweleni ekhoneni, okungabenza bavuleleke engxoxweni.
2. Veza indlela ozizwa ngayo
Khuluma imizwa yakho ngobuqotho nangeqiniso. Zama ukunganciphisi amagama ngokuthi ukuziphatha kwabo kukwenza uzizwe kanjani.
Chaza ngokusobala ukuthi yini ukuqonda kwakho kobudlelwano obunempilo nokuthi yini okulindele phambili. Qiniseka futhi ungaxolisi, ngoba unelungelo lokuba sebudlelwaneni obenelisa izidingo zakho.
3. Cela ukuthi bashintshe
Bazise ukuthi udinga ukuthi bashintshe izenzo zabo noma indlela abakhuluma ngayo nawe.
Ukucela izinguquko ezinhle ezizosiza ubuhlobo bakho akukhona ukuzicabangela wena nganoma iyiphi indlela. Ngokuzimisela ukucela ushintsho kuzodlulisa ubucayi bendaba kuwe kumlingani wakho.
4. Banikeze ithuba lokukhuluma
Kuhle ukulalela nencazelo yabo.
Zama ukungathatheki kakhulu ngezikhalazo zakho ukuze ukhohlwe ukubanikeza ithuba lokukhuluma. Ukuzizwa kuzokusiza uqonde izinto kangcono futhi uhlele izenzo zakho ngokufanele.
5. Vuma impendulo yabo noma ushiye
Kulesi sigaba, impendulo kazakwenu izonquma ukuthi ubuhlobo buqonde kuphi.
Uma benosizi futhi bemukela amaphutha abo, ungabatshela ukuthi uyakwazisa ukwethembeka kwabo futhi uhlele ukwenza izinto zisebenze. Kodwa-ke, uma bengaboni lutho olungalungile ngezenzo zabo, kungahle kube yisikhathi sokuhlola kabusha ukuma kwakho bese uyahamba.
Isiphetho
Ubudlelwano buza nezici zabo, kufaka phakathi izimpawu zomona ebudlelwaneni.
Umona ngezikhathi ezithile ujwayelekile, kepha umhawu owedlulele ungaba yinhlekelele kuwo wonke umuntu ohilelekile. Uma usola ukuthi umlingani wakho unokuthambekela okuthile komona futhi angathanda ukwazi ukuthi angakubona kanjani, naka izimpawu ezibalulwe kulesi sihloko.