-Delile
- Luyini uthando?
- Kuyini ukusondelana?
- Sebenzisa isikhathi sekhwalithi ndawonye
- 2.Practice ukusondelana ngokomzimba
- 3.Yakha ukuxhumana ngokomzwelo
Uma uzibuza ukuthi ungaba kanjani nobudlelwano obuhle kakhulu, kungenzeka ukuthi uke wazibuza ngomehluko phakathi kothando nokusondelana. Yikuphi okubaluleke kakhulu ekugcineni ubuhlobo obujabulisayo?
Bobabili abashadile kungenzeka banemibono ehlukene yokuthi yini eyenza ukuthandana kweqiniso. Kwabanye, ezothando zisho ukubuka ukushona kwelanga nebhodlela lewayini, kwabanye uthando lungaqobeka kusofa ndawonye nebhakede lenkukhu.
Ngakolunye uhlangothi, ukusondelana akuyona eyokwamukela izipho noma ukumangala ngoshade naye, kumayelana nokwakha ukuxhumana okujulile kothando, ukwethembana nokuba sengozini.
Emhlabeni omkhulu obanzi wothando, kungaba nzima ukugcina izinto ziqondile. Yingakho sidale lo mhlahlandlela olula ukukufundisa umehluko omkhulu phakathi kwezothando nokusondelana, kanye nokukubonisa ukuthi ungakufaka kanjani kokubili ebudlelwaneni bakho.
Luyini uthando?
Umehluko phakathi kothando ekusondelaneni ukuthi ezothando zivame ukubonwa njengesichasiso esidlulayo noma esingajulile.
Ukuthandana ukubonisa uthando olungakabi bucayi, imvamisa kuhlobene nokunikeza izipho noma ukuncoma.
Lokho akusho ukuthi ukuthandana akubalulekile ebudlelwaneni besikhathi eside. Ngokuphambene nalokho!
Ukucwaninga ngobusuku obujwayelekile bezinsuku kukhombisa ukuthi ukuchitha isikhathi sekhwalithi ndawonye edolobheni kukhulisa uthando lwezothando oluxhumene kakhulu nenjabulo nentshisekelo. Yilolu thando nezothando ezisiza ukuvimbela isithukuthezi sobudlelwano ekungenekeni.
Nazi izindlela eziyi-10 ongangeza ngazo ezothando emshadweni wakho.
- Ungesabi i-PDA. Ukunikeza ukwanga okuncane esidlangalaleni, ukudlala ngothando, nokubambana ngezandla konke kungakhulisa i-cuddle hormone oxytocin futhi kukwenze uzizwe uthandana kakhulu kunanini ngaphambili.
- Funa izindlela ongasiza ngazo. Sula imishini yokuwasha izitsha, udwebe oshade naye okugeza i-bubble,
- Nikeza izipho. Noma ngabe kuyinto ebiza ngokweqile njengamadayimane, amnandi njengezimbali, noma ecashile njengokucosha isoda oyithandayo, ukupha izipho ukudla okuyisisekelo.
- Khumbuza owakwakho. Landisa ukuthi nihlangane kanjani okokuqala noma nixoxe ngezikhathi zothando lwenu nonke.
- Phuma ngezinsuku zothando. Azikho izingane noma ezikhuluma ngomsebenzi ngalolu suku lothando. Lokhu kumayelana nokweshela umlingani wakho futhi - sengathi niqala ukuthandana!
- Ziqhayise ngomlingani wakho. Hhayi ngokungakhathali, kunjalo, kepha umlingani wakho uzothanda ukukuzwa uphusha ngokuthi bakhulu kangakanani.
- Ncoma omunye nomunye. Ngubani ongakuthandi ukutshelwa ukuthi bayathandeka noma babheka ikakhulukazi abathandekayo ngumuntu abamthanda kakhulu emhlabeni wonke?
- Zama okuthile okusha ndawonye. Thatha isigaba sokudansa, uye e-skydiving, noma ufunde ulimi olusha. Lokhu kuzothuthukisa ezothando nobungani.
- Yiba okuzenzakalelayo. Bhuka igumbi lehhotela elithandekayo nelithandekayo edolobheni lakho, eligcwaliswe ngenkonzo yasekamelweni kanye nejacuzzi esekamelweni.
- Yiba mnandi nsuku zonke. Bhala ukuthi “Ngiyakuthanda” esibukweni esinenkungu yokugezela noma uphekele oshade naye ukudla abakuthandayo.
Kuyini ukusondelana?
Kunomehluko omkhulu phakathi kwezothando nokusondelana. Ezothando zingahle zisuselwe ekusondeleni, kepha azakhi ukuxhumana okusondele ngempela nomuntu.
Ezothando zimayelana nokuthinta, izincomo, izipho, nokunikeza izimvemvane zomlingani wakho. Ukusondelana kumayelana nokuxhumana kwangempela, okujulile okwenzayo nomlingani wakho.
Nazi izici ezintathu ezibalulekile zokusondelana noshade naye.
Sebenzisa isikhathi sekhwalithi ndawonye
Indlela enkulu yokwakha ukusondelana ebudlelwaneni benu ukusebenzisa isikhathi sekhwalithi ejwayelekile ndawonye.
Imibhangqwana eminingi yenza umkhuba wokwenza ubusuku obujwayelekile besikhathi esisodwa noma ngaphezulu ngenyanga. Lokhu kubanikeza ithuba lokuphumula, ukucindezeleka, ukukhohlwa ngomsebenzi, nokuba nesikhathi esithile sekhwalithi kude nezingane.
Ucwaningo oluhlanganisiwe ngokuba nobusuku obujwayelekile bosuku lukhombisa ukuthi imibhangqwana echitha isikhathi esisezingeni elilodwa ndawonye ikhulisa ukuxhumana komshado. Futhi kwenza imibhangqwana izizwe sengathi abashade nabo babuthatha ngokungathi sína ubuhlobo babo. Ukuba nesikhathi 'sezithandani' ezijwayelekile kukhonjisiwe nokuthi kunciphisa amathuba edivosi futhi kukhuthaze umshado ozinzile nojabule ngokwengeziwe.
Akufanele uyeke ukukhuluma nokwazi umlingani wakho, noma ngabe nihlale isikhathi eside kangakanani ndawonye. Ucwaningo lukhombisa ukuthi ukuhlala ufisa ukwazi ngomlingani wakho kuwumkhuba onempilo ozogcina ubudlelwane benu buqinile.
Ngakho-ke, ngesikhathi esilandelayo lapho uphume khona ebusuku, buza umlingani wakho imibuzo ngaye. Bazokuthanda ukunakwa futhi ukuxhumana kwakho okusondele kuzozuza.
2.Practice ukusondelana ngokomzimba
I-chemistry yezocansi ibalulekile ekwakheni ukusondelana ebudlelwaneni. Lokhu ikakhulukazi kungenxa yehormone ye-oxytocin ekhishwe ngesikhathi sokusondelana ngokomzimba (njengokuya ocansini, ukubambana ngezandla, noma ukuqabulana) okunesibopho sokwanda kwemizwa yokwethembana futhi okukhuthaza ukubopha.
3.Yakha ukuxhumana ngokomzwelo
Ukuxhumana ngokomzwelo noshade naye akukwazi ukuhlulwa. Yilokho okugcina uxhuma ngaphezu kokusondelana ngokomzimba owabelana ngakho. Eqinisweni, ucwaningo lukhombisa ukuthi imibhangqwana yangemva kwempilo yayivamise ukugcizelela ukusondelana ngokomzwelo njengokubaluleke ngaphezu kocansi.
Ubulili bungabamba iqhaza elibalulekile ekusondeleni okunempilo noshade naye. Ucwaningo lukhombisa ukuthi ukwaneliseka ngokocansi kubikezela ukusondelana ngokomzwelo emibhangqwaneni ngenxa ye-oxytocin eshiwo ngenhla.
Ukusondelana ngokomzwelo akuyona into ongayiphoqa, kepha kunalokho, kuyinto eyenzeka ngokwemvelo ngesikhathi enisichitha ndawonye. Kuqinisa ngokusebenzisa isikhathi sekhwalithi ndawonye nokukhetha ukuba sengozini nomlingani wakho.
Umehluko phakathi kothando nokusondelana ulula. Enye into oyenzayo, enye into ozizwa ngayo. Ezothando zizokwenza umlingani wakho azizwe ekhethekile, kepha ukusondelana kweqiniso kuzobashiya bezizwa bephephile futhi bethandwa. Ukuze wakhe ubudlelwano obunempilo, obuhlala isikhathi eside, kufanele ufake kokubili empilweni yakho yothando.