-Delile
- Ukusebenzisana okungenakwenzeka
- Izitatimende ezilandelayo zikhombisa umqondo wezinto zami ezintsha zokuzithanda:
- Ukuzithanda ngokwakho kuyikhambi lokuncika ekuthembekeni
- Ukushoda kothando lwakho ukuzimela
- SLDD Inkinga / SLD uMuntu
- Ikhambi lokulawulwa kwe-codependency inala yokuzithanda
Ngangingazi ukuthi imfuno yami yokuqamba kabusha igama elithi “codependency” izongiyisa eNew York City lapho, ngoJuni 2, 2015, ngaba khona engxoxweni yesigungu namalungu amaningana ahlonishwayo omphakathi wezempilo yengqondo.
UHarville Hendrix, ubudlelwano bomhlaba wonke nochwepheshe we-psychotherapy (futhi ogunyaza izincwadi zami zolimi lwesiNgisi) uyiqhawe lami futhi ngiyabonga kakhulu ngethuba lokufunda kuye kulowo mcimbi.
Emalungwini ayisithupha ephaneli, ngasungula ukuxhumana ngokushesha noTracy B. Richards, udokotela wezengqondo waseCanada, umdwebi kanye nomphathi womshado. Ngenkathi ingxenye yami yengxoxo yayiqukethe imibono ye-codependency, narcissism, ne-Human Magnet Syndrome, uTracy wayegxile emandleni okuphulukisa okuzinakekela, ukuzamukela, futhi, okubaluleke kakhulu, ukuzithanda.
Ukusebenzisana okungenakwenzeka
Sasondelana khona manjalo ngenkathi sabelana ngemfudumalo, umuzwa wokuvumelanisa wenduduzo nokujwayela. Kubuye kwabonakala sengathi "izingane" zethu — i-My Human Magnet Syndrome kanye ne- “Self-Love Yakho Impendulo” —zathandana lapho uqala ukuyibona.
Lapho sengibuyele emsebenzini, angikwazanga ukuyeka ukucabanga futhi ngibhekise emicabangweni kaTracy ngokuzithanda.
Ngokuhamba kwesikhathi, imibono yakhe elula, kepha enhle, ithathe indawo yangempela ekhanda lami. Akumangazanga lapho imiqondo yakhe iqala ukuvela kuyo yomibili imizamo yami maqondana nezinselelo zomndeni wami wezemvelaphi nomsebenzi wami wokwelashwa / ukwelashwa kwekhodipency.
Ngokuphazima kweso, imibono yakhe yangena ezindabeni zami zokufundisa nakumavidiyo, kanye nakwezinye izingqungquthela zami.
Izitatimende ezilandelayo zikhombisa umqondo wezinto zami ezintsha zokuzithanda:
- Ukuzimela ngokweqile akunakwenzeka nge-Self-Love Abundance (SLA).
- Ama-Codependents anokushoda okukhulu othandweni lwakho lokuzithanda.
- Ukuhlukumezeka okunamathiselwe ebuntwaneni kuyimbangela yokushoda kwe-Self-Love (SLD).
- Ukushoda kothando lokuzithanda kubangelwa isizungu esingapheli, amahloni, kanye nokuhlukumezeka kwengane okungasonjululwanga.
- Ukwesaba ukubhekana namahloni okucindezelwa noma okucindezelweyo kanye nesizungu se-pathological kuqinisekisa umuntu othembekile ukuthi ahlale ebudlelwaneni obuyingozi.
- Ukuqedwa Kokushoda Kokuzithanda kanye nokuthuthuka koThando
- Ukusabalala kuyinjongo eyinhloko yokwelashwa kokuxhomekeka.
Ukuhlala ngithembekile ekuqinisekeni kwami ukuthi ngiyeke "ukuxhomekeka," okokuqala ngidinga ukuqhamuka nomuntu ofanele ozongena esikhundleni sakhe.
Ukuzithanda ngokwakho kuyikhambi lokuncika ekuthembekeni
Ngeke ngiyeke ukusesha kwami ngize ngithole igama elizochaza isimo / isipiliyoni sangempela, ngenkathi kungenzi ukuthi umuntu azizwe kabi ngaye.
Inhlanhla yami yashintsha maphakathi no-Agasti 2015, ngenkathi ngibhala i-athikili ekhuluma ngokuxhomekeka. Kuyo, ngabhala inkulumo ethi, "Ukuzithanda ngokwakho kuyindlela yokulwa nokuzimela." Ngokubona ubulula namandla ayo, ngakha i-meme, engabe sengiyithumela ezingosini zokuxhumana nabantu eziningana.
Ngangingeke ngibikezele ukuphendula okuhle kakhulu kumame wami nencazelo yawo, njengoba kuvusa izingxoxo ezijulile nezikhombisa ukuthi kanjani futhi kungani ukungazithandi kwakuxhunyaniswe nokuzimela.
Lokhu kwaba lapho ngangazi ukuthi ngangisentweni enkulu!
Njengezinye izinto ezihlobene nokutholwa kwe-codependency, ibizohamba emqondweni wami ngaphambi kokuletha isifundo sayo esibaluleke kakhulu-i-epiphany yokulandelela.
Isikhathi sami sokuzithanda se-eureka safika kimi cishe izinyanga ezimbili kamuva.
Ukushoda kothando lwakho ukuzimela
Ngenkathi ngithuthukisa izinto zomhlangano wami omusha we-Codependency Cure, ngakha isilayidi esihloko sithi "Ukuzikhohlisa Kuthando Ukuthembela!"
Lapho selishicilelwe, ngakhangwa yisikhukhula senjabulo nokulindela. Yilapho-ke lapho ngazizwa ngithi, Ukuzimela Kuthando Lokushoda Kokulawulwa Yindlela Yokuziphatha! Anginalo ihaba uma ngithi ngicishe ngawa esihlalweni sami ngijabule.
Ngibona masinyane ukubaluleka kwale nkulumo elula, ngaqala ukuyifaka kuma-athikili, amabhulogi, amavidiyo we-YouTube, ukuqeqeshwa, kanye namakhasimende ami e-psychotherapy. Kwangimangaza ngokuphelele ukuthi mangaki amakhompiyutha, alulama noma cha, akhonjwe kahle ngawo.
Ngangitshelwa ngokungaguquguquki ukuthi isiza kanjani abantu ukuthi baqonde kangcono inkinga yabo, ngaphandle kokubenza bazizwe bengaphelele noma "bebi."
Cishe ngaleso sikhathi, ngathatha isinqumo sokwengamela esikhundleni se- “codependency” nge-Self-Love Deficit Disorder.
Yize inamaqoqo amaningi futhi ingenza ngiboshwe ulimi izikhathi eziningi, bengizimisele ukufeza izinhlelo zami zokuthatha umhlalaphansi. Ukusheshisela onyakeni owodwa kamuva: amashumi ezinkulungwane zabantu, uma kungenjalo, amukele i-Self-Love Deficit Disorder njengegama elisha lesimo sabo.
Ukuvumelana kube wukuthi iSelf-Love Deficit Disorder ayilona nje igama elifanele lesi simo, kepha ibuye yagqugquzela abantu ukuthi bafune ukuyixazulula.
SLDD Inkinga / SLD uMuntu
Esikhathini esingamasonto ambalwa, nginqume ukuqala umkhankaso womhlaba wonke wokuthatha umhlalaphansi "wokuxhomekeka," ngasikhathi sinye ngakha ukuqwashisa okubanzi nokwamukelwa kokufakwa esikhundleni. Ngenze uhlelo lwami ngamavidiyo e-YouTube, ama-athikili, amabhulogi, izingxoxo zomsakazo nezama-TV, ukuqeqeshwa kobungcweti kanye nezingqungquthela zemfundo.
Ukube bekunenhlangano esemthethweni yokulawulwa kwamakhodi, ngabe ngibavimbezele ngezicelo zokuthi ngivumele ukuthi ngiyithathe esikhundleni sayo ngegama elifanelekile, iSelf-Love Deficit Disorder (SLDD), umuntu kube yi-Self-Love Deficient (SLD). Ngiyaziqhenya ngokusho ukuthi i-SLDD ne-SLD kubonakala sengathi ziyaqhubeka.
Ikhambi lokulawulwa kwe-codependency inala yokuzithanda
Noma ngingakuvumeli ukusetshenziswa kwamagama amabi atholakala ekuhlolweni kwempilo yengqondo, ngikholelwa ngokuqinile ukuthi “Ukusilela” ku-Self-Love Deficit Disorder kubalulekile, njengoba kucacisa inkinga edinga ukwelashwa.
Ngokungafani nokunye ukuphazamiseka, uma i-SLDD iselashwe ngempumelelo, iyelapheka — ingadingi ukwelashwa okulandelayo noma ukukhathazeka ngokuphindelela noma ukubuyela emuva.
Ngokuxazululwa kwanoma yikuphi ukuphazamiseka, ngikholwa ukuthi ukuxilongwa okunikezwe umuntu kufanele kususwe noma kufakwe okunye okukhombisa impilo yengqondo enhle noma ethuthukisiwe.
Lo mcabango uphefumulelwe umsebenzi wami wokuxilongwa Okukhulu Kokucindezeleka, okungakhombisi zimpawu noma zimpawu uma seluthathwe kahle. Umqondo ofanayo usebenza ku-SLDD: kungani ubambelela kulokho kutholakala? Lo mugqa womcabango wangikhuthaza ukuthi ngakhe igama elimele ukuxazululwa unomphela kwe-SLDD — iCodependency Cure.
Isinyathelo esilandelayo kwaba ukudala igama lokwelashwa kwe-SLDD.NgoFebhuwari 2017, ngaqala ukubhekisa ekwelashweni okunje nge-Self-Love Recovery (SLR), njengoba bekungukunwetshwa kwemvelo kwegama lami elisha lokuzithanda.