-Delile
- 1. Yiba owokuqala ingxoxo
- 2. Yiba sengozini
- 3. Yabelanani ngezimfihlo
- 4. Kwazise futhi ubonise ukubonga
- 5. Yiba yinduduzo kubo
- 6. Lindela okulindelekile kwiseshini
- 7. Yabelana ngokuhlangenwe nakho okubalulekile kobuntwana
- 8. Khulumani ngokuthi niqale nini ukuthandana
- 9. Tshela umlingani wakho ukuthi kungani ubathanda
- 10. Buza imibuzo eminingi
- 11. Xhuma ngokwengqondo nangokomzimba
- 12. Yiba nguwe
Ubudlelwano abugcini nje ngokusondelana ngokomzimba; zingaphezulu kakhulu kwalokho futhi zibandakanya uthando, ukwethembana, inhlonipho nokuzibophezela.
Ngaphandle kokuba nobuhlobo bobulili ebudlelwaneni bakho obuseduze, nobabili kufanele nikwazi ukuxhumana ngokusondelana ngokomzwelo.
Indlela enhle yokufeza ukusondelana ngokomzwelo ngokuba nezingxoxo ezisondelene.
Izingxoxo ezisondelene zimayelana nokuba ndawonye nokujabulela ukuba ndawonye. Izingxoxo ezinjalo ziyindlela enhle yokuqinisa izibopho phakathi kwabalingani nokuthuthukisa imizwa yabo komunye nomunye.
Esinye isizathu esenza izingxoxo ezisondelene zibalulekile ebudlelwaneni ukuxazulula noma yiziphi izingqinamba zokusondelana ongahle ubhekane nazo.
Ukugcina uxhumano lwakho lomzwelo noma okunamathiselwe ngokomzwelo owabelana nomlingani wakho, kufanele usebenze ngokuba nezingxoxo ezisondelene.
Ngakho-ke, uma ufuna imibuzo esondelene ongayibuza isoka lakho noma imibuzo yothando ongayibuza umlingani wakho, ezibalwe ngezansi izindlela ezimbalwa ongazisebenzisa ukuba nezingxoxo ezisondelene nomlingani wakho.
1. Yiba owokuqala ingxoxo
Ungabi namahloni noma ube namahloni, kunalokho, yiba ngowokuqala ukuqala inkulumo.
Iba ngowokuqala ukuqala ingxoxo yobudlelwano futhi ubuze imibuzo, utshele imininingwane ngawe, futhi uzothola ukuthi akunasikhathi, umlingani wakho uzolandela futhi engeze ingxenye yabo engxoxweni.
Nayi eminye imibuzo emihle ongayibuza umfana noma intombazane ukusondeza ingxoxo esondelene nayo:
- Yini into yokuqala oyibonile ngami?
- Ukudlala ngokomzimba kudlala yiphi indima ekutheni uphishekela ubudlelwano noma cha?
- Ungichaza kanjani kwabanye abantu?
- Yiziphi izimfanelo ezingenza ngikhetheke kuwe?
Ukubuza le mibuzo ejulile kungakusiza uqonde ukuthi uhambelana kangakanani nomlingani wakho.
2. Yiba sengozini
Susa konke ukwesaba nokukhathazeka lapho ukhuluma nomlingani wakho. Vuleka futhi uthembeke kunoma yini oyishoyo futhi ube nesibindi sokuhlanganyela.
Ukwesaba ukulahlekelwa ngumlingani wakho ngenxa yokuba sengozini kwakho kubonisa ukungabi nokwethemba.
Ukwabelana nobuthakathaka bakho, nayi imibuzo ephathelene nobulili ongayibuza intombazane noma umfana:
- Bangaki abantu osondelene nabo ngokocansi?
- Iyiphi indawo exaka kakhulu owake waya ocansini kuyo?
- Kukuphi emzimbeni wakho okuyindawo oyithandayo ongathintwa kuyo?
- Isimo sobulili ofuna ukusizama?
- Uke wathumela izithombe zabantu abanqunu?
- Wake waba nesifiso esingafanele?
3. Yabelanani ngezimfihlo
Ubudlelwano budinga ukuthi ngamunye wabalingani athembeke ngokuphelele futhi ahloniphane komunye nomunye.
Ochwepheshe abaningi bancome imibhangqwana ukuthi yabelane ngezimfihlo ebebengeke babelane ngazo ngenye indlela.
Ucwaningo olwenziwe yiCDC luqhakambise ukuthi ukwethembeka kuyisici esibalulekile ebudlelwaneni obunempilo.
Ukuvula imfihlo ejulile kuyindlela enhle yokusondela kumlingani wakho.
Eminye imibuzo eyimfihlo ejulile ongayibuza umlingani wakho:
- Wake wakopela umlingani?
- Ingabe ubudlelwane bethu bungokwenyama ngokwanele kuwe?
- Ngabe unayo imibono oyithandayo egcwalisiwe?
4. Kwazise futhi ubonise ukubonga
Zizwe ukhululekile ukutshela umlingani wakho ukuthi ubonga kangakanani ngokuba nazo empilweni yakho. Batshele ukuthi usazisa kangakanani isikhathi osichitha nabo nokuthi lobu budlelwano bubaluleke kangakanani kuwe.
Ukuzwakalisa ukubonga kuzoqinisa ubuhlobo bakho kuphela.
Bheka futhi: izindlela ezingama-25 zokwazisa oshade naye.
5. Yiba yinduduzo kubo
Yiba umsekeli uma umlingani wakho abelana ngento ebibaphazamisa noma ebathinte ngandlela thile.
Bazise ukuthi uzohlala useceleni kwabo futhi ubaphakamise noma ngabe yini futhi ubasize badlule ezenzakalweni ezibakhathazayo.
6. Lindela okulindelekile kwiseshini
Izingxoxo ezisondelene akuzona nje zonke ezithandekayo kodwa kunalokho zingaba okuthile okunenjongo ngokwengeziwe. Bamba izingxoxo ngezimali, umndeni, izingane, ngisho namafa.
Lezi zonke izifundo ezikhombisa ukuthi nobabili nizimisele ukutshala imali kulobu budlelwano ngokuqhubekayo futhi nifisa ukububona buhlala unomphela.
7. Yabelana ngokuhlangenwe nakho okubalulekile kobuntwana
Ukukhuluma ngobuntwana bakho noma isikhathi sakho ngaphambi kokuhlangana nomlingani wakho kuyindlela enhle yokukhombisa umlingani wakho ukuthi wawunjani ngaphambi kokuba bangene empilweni yakho.
Kukusiza ukuthi ubonakalise futhi ubavumele ukuthi babone ukuthi ukhule kangakanani, wafunda futhi waziguqula kanjani eminyakeni edlule.
8. Khulumani ngokuthi niqale nini ukuthandana
Ngalezi zikhathi zobumnene, kuhle ukwabelana futhi utshele umlingani wakho mayelana nesikhathi owabawela ngaso.
Kungenzeka kube yizikhathi ezincane kakhulu lapho ubonile ukuthi yiwona ‘munye,’ kepha bekusho lukhulu kuwe.
9. Tshela umlingani wakho ukuthi kungani ubathanda
Yabelana ngezizathu zokuthi kungani nithandana.
Sithanda abanye bethu ababalulekile kuyo yonke into, kepha kuhlala kunezinto ezimbalwa ezisikhumbuza kaninginingi ukuthi kungani sikhethe lo muntu, njengokumamatheka kwakhe, umbala wamehlo akhe, indlela abakhuluma ngayo, njll.
10. Buza imibuzo eminingi
Buza konke ofisa ukukwazi ngomlingani wakho. Babuze ngempilo yabo ngaphambi kokuba bahlangane nawe, ngamasu abo ngekusasa nanoma yini ozizwa ukuthi izokusiza ukuba uziqonde kangcono.
11. Xhuma ngokwengqondo nangokomzimba
Ngenkathi uhleli lapho futhi ukhuluma, kungasiza ngokwengeziwe uma nobabili nibukana emehlweni kwesinye isikhathi noma nibambane ngezandla noma ngokuthinta okuthile okuncane.
Lokhu kungasiza ukuhlanganisa nobabili ngokuqhubekayo futhi kuthuthukise isimo sobudlelwano bakho.
12. Yiba nguwe
Sekukonke, yiba nguwe! Yiba umuntu osenhliziyweni yakhe, futhi ungazami ukuzishintsha ukuze nje umlingani wakho akuthande.
Umlingani wakho kufanele akuthande futhi amukele lokho oyikho hhayi i-façade oyifakile. Ngokufanayo, kufanele uthande futhi wamukele umlingani wakho ukuthi ungubani ngaphandle kokuzama ukuwashintsha noma ukulungisa amaphutha abo.