-Delile
- 1. Mnikeze isikhala
- 2. Melana nesifiso sokulwa
- 3. Lalela sengathi awukaze ulalele phambilini
- 4. Xolisa (noma ngabe usuvele unayo)
- 5. Phakamisa ukwelulekwa ngomshado
- 6. Ungalokothi, uyeke
Wena nomkakho nihlukene. Nobabili benazi ukuthi sekuyisikhathi sokuphumula, kepha bekulula ukusho kunokukwenza. Uyamkhumbula. Uphuthelwa ukulala eduze kwakhe, ukumenza ahleke, futhi ubhekane nosuku ngalunye naye eceleni kwakho. Ningcono nje ndawonye futhi ongazibuza khona ukuthi ngingambuyisa kanjani umkami ngemuva kokuhlukana.
Okukhumbula kakhulu yizinsuku lapho benizwana khona futhi bekungekho mizwa enzima phakathi kwenu. Kepha ngeshwa, umshado wakho ubungakahambi kanjalo isikhashana. Nobabili nikhathele ukulwa nokunganaki. Kungakho nihlukane kwasekuqaleni.
Ngesikhathi sokuqala kokuhlukana kwakho, uhlala uzitshela ukuthi 'Ngiyamkhumbula umkami' futhi uqhubeka ucabanga ngezindlela zokuthi ungamzuza kanjani umkakho futhi ngikuthande futhi.
Ucabanga ukuthi uzothini ukubuyisa umkakho nokuthi ungenza kanjani ukuthi unkosikazi wakho athandane nawe futhi ngemuva kokuhlukana.
Uma uhlukaniswe isikhashana, ngethemba, izinto sezehlise umoya kancane. Nobabili nikwazi ukusula kancane ukwesaba futhi nihlole ukuthi izinto zikuphi. Isikhathi siyaphola amanxeba, kepha hhayi wonke. Yini enye okudingeka uyenze ukubuyisa umkakho ngemuva kokuhlukana?
Nawa amanye amathiphu angasiza ukuthi ungambuyisa kanjani unkosikazi wakho ngemuva kokushiya kwakho nokuthi ungenza kanjani ukuthi unkosikazi wakho akuthande futhi ngemuva kokuhlukana:
1. Mnikeze isikhala
Ungamzuza kanjani unkosikazi wakho emuva kokwehlukana kuqala ngawe ukuqonda ukuthi kungani nahlukana kwasekuqaleni. Ungahle ungafuni ukuvumela lokhu kuhlukaniswa kuqhubeke, kepha uma yilokho akudingayo, mnike kona. Ukujaha izinto kungalimaza amathuba akho okuthi afune ukubuyelana.
Angakukhumbula futhi afune ukuba nawe futhi, kepha angadinga isikhathi esithe xaxa sokulungisa izinto. Kuhloniphe lokho futhi ungamcindezeli noma umnikeze ama-ultimatums noma ama-timeline.
2. Melana nesifiso sokulwa
Ungangeni ezindleleni zakho zakudala zokulwa, noma evikela noma elwa nawe. Lokhu ngeke kumenze afune ukuba nawe nsuku zonke — yilokho nina nobabili enakusuka kukho.
Futhi, intukuthelo yakhe kungenzeka ukuthi akuyona intukuthelo yangempela, ukudabuka noma ukwesaba. Uyesaba. Ukwesaba ukulahlekelwa nguwe, ukuthi impilo yakhe izoba njani ngaphandle kwakho, yokubhekana nakho yedwa. Uma ekumemeza, lalela nje ngentshiseko.
Ungalindeli ithuba lakho lokukhuluma, mnake ngokugcwele, futhi uqinisekise imizwa yakhe.
3. Lalela sengathi awukaze ulalele phambilini
Abesifazane bafuna ukuzwa nje. Kepha hhayi ukuzwa nje amagama — empeleni thola futhi uqonde imizwa engemuva kwamagama. Xhuma, uthole omunye nomunye - yilokho akufunayo.
Ingxenye yesizathu sokuthi nihlukaniswe akungabazeki ngoba akazizwanga ezwa nguwe. Leyo yinto enkulu okumele ishintshe uma ufuna abuye.
Lapho ekhuluma nawe, ungazami ukulungisa izinkinga zakhe — lalela nje. Uhlakaniphe ngokwanele ukuthola izinto, lokho akudingayo kuwe indlebe elalelayo kanye nesikhuthazo.
“Ngiyaxolisa sithandwa,” futhi “Ngiyakuqonda,” futhi, “Ungakwenza,” kufanele kube yimishwana oyibamba ngekhanda manje futhi oyisebenzisa njalo. Ungalaleli ukuphendula, lalela, futhi umuzwe ngempela. Kuzokwenza umehluko.
Umqondo ukuthi ungazi kuphela ukuthi ungambuyisa kanjani umkakho ngemuva kokuhlukana kepha futhi uthole nendlela yokuqinisekisa ukuthi nihlala ndawonye.
4. Xolisa (noma ngabe usuvele unayo)
Ushonile, uxolile — kuzokwanela nini? Into ukuthi, lokho afuna ukukuzwa ngempela yimizwa yakho ngemuva kokuxolisa. Ukuthi uxolo noma ukuzisola akumchazi ukuthi uzizwa kanjani ngempela. Futhi masivume - awuyena umuntu ongasho ngempela ukuthi uzizwa kanjani kaningi. Yebo, lesi ngesinye sezikhathi ezingavamile.
Noma ngabe uyafuna noma cha, kufanele uchithe amathumbu akho. Yithi uyaxolisa ngoba awukaze ufune ukumzwisa ubuhlungu, uyamkhumbula, ungavele ubone impilo yakho unaye.
Yenaba ngalokho, kepha uthola umbono. Ukusho ukuthi uxolile kuhle, kepha ukuchaza imizwa yakho ngemuva kwalokhu yilokho okuzosiza ukuzuza inhliziyo yomkakho futhi.
5. Phakamisa ukwelulekwa ngomshado
Iningi labesifazane likhona ebhodini ngokululekwa ngokwengqondo, futhi uma uliphakamisa nakanjani uzoba sohlangothini lwakhe oluhle. Kepha kuyinto eyodwa ukuvuma ukuhamba, futhi enye into ngokuphelele ukufaka umzamo wakho ogcwele enqubeni.
Ukwelashwa akulula, ikakhulukazi kwabesilisa abaningi. Kukhulunywa kakhulu ngemizwa. Impela le isudi eqinile yowesifazane hhayi eyesilisa eqinile. Kulungile.
Inani lomzamo owafaka kuwo liyisihluthulelo lapha.
Ngakho-ke vela sonke isikhathi, lalela owelapha, lalela umkakho, bese wabelana ngemizwa yakho. Ngokwenza lokhu, uzofunda kabanzi ngomkakho futhi mhlawumbe nangaphezulu ngawe.
6. Ungalokothi, uyeke
Noma izinto zibukeka zimfiliba, ungalokothi ulahle ithemba lokuthi nobabili nizokwazi ukubuyelana. Konke kumayelana nesimo sakho sengqondo nengqondo yakho. Uma usuvele udele enhliziyweni nasengqondweni yakho, uzokwazi.
Abesifazane banomuzwa ojulile wokuthi abanye abantu bazizwa kanjani — ikakhulukazi indoda ayithandayo.
Ithemba liyisinqumo osenzayo nsuku zonke. Ngakho-ke vuka nsuku zonke ukhulume izinto ezikhuthazayo kuwe, bese ucabanga imicabango ekhuthazayo. Ungavumeli noma ngubani noma yini ikuvimbe.
Ungumkakho, uyamthanda, futhi uma ufaka isikhathi nomzamo kahle, uzomzuzisa - ukuphela kwendaba.