-Delile
- Ukuba nenhloso yokugcina ukuxhumana okunempilo
- Ukuxhumana noshade naye lapho uphuke imizwa
- Qaphela ukuthi awukho kulona ukuwina
- Lalela okushiwo umlingani wakho
- Buza imibuzo efanele yokuxhumanisa nowakwakho
- Lungiselela ingxoxo ejulile nomunye wakho obalulekile
Izinkinga zomshado zingavela ngezindlela eziningi, kufaka phakathi ukungabi namandla okukhulumisana kahle noshade naye. Kepha, umshado nokuxhumana kuhlangene nobudlelwano benjabulo.
Izinkinga zemali, impilo ebuthaka, abasekhweni abanobuthi, ukukhulisa izingane, izinkinga zomsebenzi, nokungathembeki kwezinye zezinto ezingathinta inhliziyo yomshado futhi kubangele ukuwohloka kokuxhumana.
Izinkinga zokuxhumana ziyakhathaza futhi zenza isimo esibi singehlulwe nangaphezulu.
Uma kuzwakala sengathi konke owake wakwenza ukulwa, noma imizwa yakho nezinkathazo kungazwakali, uzozizwa ucindezelekile futhi mhlawumbe ukhathazeke nangekusasa lomshado wakho.
Izinkinga emshadweni wakho zingadala ukuthi nibe kude kakhulu komunye nomunye, futhi inkinga enkulu ukuthi anikwazi ukuxhumana.
Awusakhulumi nje, futhi uyakuzwa ukusondelana owawunakho ngaphambili.
Ngabe uzithola ufuna "izindlela zokukhulumisana kangcono nonkosikazi wami," "unkosikazi noma umyeni wenqaba ukuxhumana," noma "izindlela zokukhuluma nomyeni wakho mayelana nokungajabuli"?
Uma esinye sezimo ezingenhla sizwakala njengendaba yakho, ungakhathazeki noma uphelelwe yithemba. Kunzima ukuxhumana lapho izinto zinzima, kepha akunakwenzeka ukuthola ukuthi wenzeni lapho ungakwazi ukuxhumana nomlingani wakho.
Kunezinyathelo ezifakazelwe nezinhlobo ezahlukahlukene zokuxhumana ezibucayi emshadweni onempilo njengo:
- Izingxoxo ezingakahleleki zilula ithoni nesisindo futhi zengeza ubumnandi esikhathini esichithwa ndawonye.
- Imihlangano yokuphatha zisuselwa ekusetshenzisweni futhi zibucayi emvelweni. Kuholela enqubweni yokwenza izinqumo.
- Izingxoxo eziyinselele ziphathelene nezinkinga ebudlelwaneni futhi zidlala indima ebalulekile emshadweni.
- Izingxoxo ezishintsha impilo gxila ezihlokweni ezibaluleke kakhulu ngaphandle komsebenzi, izingane, ikhaya, njll. Ngokuyinhloko zimayelana nokuzibophezela okusondelene.
Ngakho-ke, sebenzela ukusungula ukuxhumana nomlingani wakho bese uxhumana nomyeni wakho ngaphandle kokulwa. Musa ukukhipha izinto ezincane bese uqala ukuzibandakanya nomkakho ezingxoxweni ezizuzisayo.
Khumbula nje ukuthi ukuxhumana kuyisibopho sokubamba umshado wakho uqinile.
Nayi ividiyo eqondayo ekwakheni ubudlelwano obuzinzile:
Ukuba nenhloso yokugcina ukuxhumana okunempilo
Emizamweni yakho yokuhamba emanzini angenalutho wokuthi ungaxhumana kanjani noshade naye, ungahlali ocingweni, unethemba lokuthi ukuxhumana emshadweni kuzoshisa futhi kusondelane ngomlingo.
Funda ukuze ufunde ukuthi ungakhuluma kanjani noshade naye lapho izinto zinzima.
Njengoba ukhuluma nomkakho noma umyeni wakho, khumbula ukuthi ukukhuphula ivolumu akulitholi iphuzu lakho.
Ukumemeza kwenzeka lapho othile ezizwa ekhungathekile noma engazwakali kangangokuba kufanele avele nephuzu lakhe noma ngabe kunjani.
Okuthile kuyaqhuma, futhi sizizwa sengathi uma nje siphakamisa ivolumu ngokwanele, impela sizokuzwakala ekugcineni.
Ngeshwa, lokho kuvame ukuba yinto yokugcina ukwenzeka.
Cishe uyazi vele ukuthi kunjani ukumenyezelwa. Idala imizwa eminingi engemihle futhi imvamisa idala impendulo yokulwa noma yendiza.
Lapho kumenyezwa, iningi labantu liyamemeza nalo noma lifuna ukuphuma lapho— ukugxila kuyasuka esihlokweni esiseduze kuya kungxabano.
Ukuxhumana noshade naye lapho uphuke imizwa
Ukumemeza kwandisa ukungezwani.
Izinto okufanele ukhulume ngazo nonkosikazi wakho noma umyeni wakho, kungakhathalekile ukuthi zinjani, zingadluliselwa ngaphandle kokuthethana noma ukukhuluma omunye komunye ukusungula ubunye.
Ngakho-ke, ungakhuluma kanjani noshade naye?
Ukuze uthuthukise izinga lokusebenza ngempumelelo nokukhiqiza njengoba uxhumana noshade naye, funda ukuxhumana ngaphandle kokumemeza, futhi uzobe ususendleleni yokuxhumana okungcono.
Uma uzizwa ukhungathekile futhi ucabanga ukuthi ungaqala ukumemeza noma yimuphi umzuzu ngesikhathi sempi, thatha isikhathi esincane uhambe ibanga elifushane, ingilazi yamanzi epholile, noma uze ucashe bese ushaya isigqoko emqamelweni imizuzu embalwa .
Qaphela ukuthi awukho kulona ukuwina
Ungaxhumana kanjani noshade naye lapho nobabili nibhekene nokuxazulula izikolo?
Ukucabanga okucasulayo kungukuchitha ukuxhumana okuhle. Lapho izinto zinzima, kulula ukuwela emqondweni wokufuna “ukubuyela” kubo noma ukuveza iphuzu lakho ukuze uzonqoba empini.
Inkinga ukuthi lapho uzama ukunqoba impi, wena noshade naye niyalahlekelwa.
Ukuba "nomnqobi" kusho ukuthi ngokuzenzakalela, omunye wenu uyajabula, kanti omunye usala ezizwa elimele. Lokho akuyona into enamandla kunoma yimuphi umshado.
Esikhundleni sokuhileleka engxabanweni, shintshela ingqondo yakho kuleyo yeqembu. Wena nozakwenu nikule nto ndawonye.
Noma yini ikuphathe kabi, ukhiye wokuxhumana nowakwakho ngendlela enempilo ukuthola isisombululo esikwenza uzizwe sengathi niphumelele nobabili.
Lalela okushiwo umlingani wakho
Ukungalaleli komunye nomunye kuyinkinga yangempela lapho ubudlelwano bakho busivele bunzima. Ukukhungatheka nokungezwani kuyabila, futhi nobabili nifuna ukuveza iphuzu lenu. Ucwaningo lukhombisile ukuthi ukulalelisisa kuhlobene nokuziphatha okuphumelela kakhulu kokubhekana nokwaneliseka kobudlelwano.
Ungakhulumisana kanjani noshade naye lapho nobabili niphikisana ukuze nishaye amaphuzu enu afanele?
Esikhundleni sokuzama nje ukuveza iphuzu lakho, thatha isinyathelo emuva, futhi ulalele lokho umlingani wakho akushoyo.
Njengoba uxhumana noshade naye, lalela amagama abawasebenzisayo, unake ithoni yabo nezwi labo, futhi ubheke abakushoyo nolimi lwabo lomzimba.
Uzofunda okuningi kakhulu ngokuthi bakuphi manje nokuthi yini ebakhathaza kakhulu.
Ukufunda ukulalela kungaba nzima ekuqaleni. Eminye imibhangqwana ikuthola kuwusizo ukusetha i-timer imizuzu eyishumi bese benikana ithuba lokukhuluma ngaphandle kokuphazamiseka.
Buza imibuzo efanele yokuxhumanisa nowakwakho
Akumangalisi ukuthi sibuze imibuzo engafanele kwesinye isikhathi. Ngemuva kwakho konke, alikho ikilasi esikoleni lokuthi wenzeni uma usumdala futhi ushadile, futhi kubukeka sengathi konke akuhambi kahle.
- Kulula ukushelela ekutheni “kungani usho njalo?” nokuthi “ulindele ukuthi ngenzeni? Ngizama konke okusemandleni ami! ”
- Zama ukushintshela leyo mibuzo ukuze uthole "okudingayo?" nokuthi “yini engingayenza ukuze ngikweseke?”
Ukuthi ungaxhumana kanjani noshade naye, yazisa umlingani wakho ukuthi ukule nto nabo nokuthi imizwa nezidingo zabo zibalulekile.
Bakhuthaze ukuba benze okufanayo nakuwe, futhi kungakabiphi, nizokwakha izixazululo ndawonye esikhundleni sokubanjwa yizinkinga.
Ukuxhumana lapho izinto zinzima akunakwenzeka. Futhi, imibhangqwana ivame ukuba nenkinga yokuthi ingayiqala kanjani ingxoxo enzima.
- Vuleka, wamukele, ungasongeli, futhi ulwele ukuchaza ngesineke wonke umongo wengxoxo.
- Qiniseka ukuthi umyalezo wakho awungcolisiwe noma awuqondwanga kahle.
Lungiselela ingxoxo ejulile nomunye wakho obalulekile
Akukho ukuswela kwezeluleko zokuxhumana ngempumelelo nomlingani wakho noma izindlela zokwenza ngcono ukuxhumana komshado. Ngaphandle kwalokho, ukuthi ungaxhumana kanjani nomlingani wakho ngendlela enempilo kuyinto engeke yanikezwa izipuni izithandani.
Ukwazi ukuthi ukuxhumana nomuntu oshade naye ngendlela evuthayo, engenamsebenzi kuzodala ibanga, kunciphise ukusondelana, nokubukela phansi ukubaluleka kobudlelwano kubalulekile.
Ukuthi ungaxhumana kanjani emshadweni, ukuqwashisa, nenhloso efanele izosheshisa intuthuko yakho ekuthuthukiseni amakhono wokuxhumana nowakwakho.
Ukulungiswa nje okumbalwa kuzoqinisa ukuzethemba kwakho ekukhulumisaneni ngaphandle kwengxabano, futhi ubudlelwano benu buzoqina ngenxa yalokho.
Ngiyethemba, ngeke uzithole ufuna izeluleko mayelana nokuthi "ungakhuluma kanjani nomkami?" noma "ukuxhumana kanjani nomyeni wami?"
Landela le miyalo yokuthi ungaxhumana kanjani noshade naye, futhi kuzoguqula ubudlelwane bakho bube ubudlelwano obujabulisayo nobenelisayo.