-Delile
Kukhona izindaba ezingenakubalwa zokungathembeki - ukungathembeki ngokomzwelo, ukungathembeki ngokocansi nangokwezimali; ukwephula ukwethenjwa okubangela ukulimala kobuhlobo obuhlungu nobubuhlungu. Kubuhlungu kakhulu ukuzwa ukuthi abantu bakhungathekile kanjani lapho bezwa ngokukhashelwa abalingani babo. Kepha kunamakhono namathuluzi okubasiza ukuthi balulame kulokhu kulimala kobudlelwano futhi kubabeke endleleni eya empilweni ejabulisayo nasebudlelwaneni. Eminye imibhangqwana ihlala icwile ezinkingeni zayo, icwila ngaphansi kwesisindo sokukhashelwa nobuhlungu kwesinye isikhathi iminyaka ngaphambi kokuthi ifune usizo noma inqume ukubuchitha ubudlelwano. Ukukhohlisa abalingani kushabalalisa umndeni. Bacekela phansi ukuphepha kwasekhaya futhi bathinta kabi ikusasa lezingane.
Ngiyazi ukuthi kuyenzeka, ngiyazi ukuthi awuzange uhlose ukulimaza umlingani wakho futhi uzosheshe unqume ingalo kunokulimaza ingane yakho. Ukukopela kungenye yezenzo zobugovu ongazenza lapho ungumzali. Ukubeka izidingo kanye nezifiso zakho ngaphezu kwezidingo zezingane zakho kanye nomndeni wakho kuyingozi kakhulu kunokuba ungabona. Umphumela wokungathembeki emndenini ngisho nasezingane ezincane kakhulu mibi futhi uyalimaza; noma ngabe umndeni uyahlukana noma uhlala ndawonye. Izingane zidinga ukuvikeleka nokuphepha emakhaya azo. Kudingeka bakwazi ukuthembela kubanakekeli babo abayinhloko ukuthi bazobasiza futhi babathande futhi babondle. Lapho uphila impilo embaxambili noma uphakathi kwengxabano ebudlelwaneni bakho nomlingani wakho, izingane ziyathinteka. Ungahle ungacabangi ukuthi bayazi ukuthi kwenzekani, kepha bazi kakhulu kunalokho ongakubona.
Uma umndeni wakho uhlukene ngenxa yokungathembeki, ubeka umlingani wakho nezingane zakho engcupheni. Bangase bahlupheke hhayi kuphela ngokomzwelo, kepha nangokomzimba nangokomnotho. Uma oshade naye elahlekelwa ukwesekwa kwakho, kuzokwenzekani ezinganeni zakho? Njengomzali, ingxenye yesibopho sakho ezinganeni zakho ukumodela ukuziphatha okuhle, ukuzibonisa ngesibonelo ukuthi ungaba kanjani ngumuntu olungile, isakhamuzi esihloniphekile, futhi ubonise ubudlelwano obunothando nobunempilo kubo. Uma izingane zikhula zingasebenzi kahle, izingqinamba zazo zokuphila impilo yabantu abadala engasebenzi kahle ngokwazo ziphakeme kakhulu. Izingane zingathembela kanjani futhi zizizwe zivikelekile uma zikhuliswe esimweni sokukhaphela nokungazethembi kubazali bazo?
Noma kunini lapho ulingeka ukuba ungathembeki, unenketho. Ungakhetha ukwenza eyodwa yezinto ezimbili.
1. Thola ukuthi kungani ucabanga ukukopela
Ungazibheka kahle wena nobudlelwano bakho nomlingani wakho bese uthola ukwelulekwa ngokomsebenzi ukuthola ukuthi kungani ucabanga ukukopela. Kwenzekeni ebudlelwaneni bakho okwenze ukuthi kube lula ukungathembeki?
2. Ukukopela nokubeka ubudlelwano engcupheni
Ungakwazi ukukopela; ungaqamba amanga, futhi ungathembeki kumlingani wakho bese uzibeka engcupheni yokonakalisa umndeni wakho nokubeka engcupheni ukuphepha nempilo yezingane zakho. Bese kuthiwani?
Manje funda futhi inombolo 1. Uqale kulo mndeni ngokuzibophezela futhi mhlawumbe wenze isithembiso kumlingani wakho sokuthi uzowathanda futhi uwazise. Waletha izingane zakho emhlabeni ukuze ube nomndeni. Ngabe ukulungele ukukulahla konke lokho? Awudingi ukukopela. Ungathola uthando nokuxhumana okudingayo nomlingani wakho. Ubenayo kanye futhi ungaphinde ube nayo. Akunakugwenywa ukuthi ulahlekelwe ngumndeni wakho. Ungalungisa okungahambi kahle futhi ugcine ubudlelwane bakho buqinile nomndeni wakho ndawonye. Amathuba yilokho okufisa ngokweqiniso; lokho kuxhumana okulahlekile.
Umelaphi wombhangqwana ofanelekayo angakusiza ukuthi ukuthole. Ungalindi uze wenze okuthile ozozisola ngakho. Thatha izinyathelo manje ukulungisa ukuxhumana nomlingani wakho. Kungenzeka. Ngikubona nsuku zonke. Sinamathuluzi okulungisa okuphukile phakathi kwakho. Ungakulahli lokho owakhile ngomuzwa noma umzuzwana wobuthakathaka. Ikusasa lomndeni wakho libaluleke kakhulu.