-Delile
- Iresiphi yobudlelwano obunempilo nobenelisayo
- Izindlela zobudlelwano obanelisayo
- Okungafanele kwenziwe kobuhlobo obanelisayo
Wena nomlingani wakho ninobudlelwano obuhle nobunempilo, kepha ingabe buyagcwaliseka ngokomoya?
Ukuba nobudlelwano obunelisa ngokomzwelo kuyisihluthulelo sokuhlala ndawonye kuze kube yilapho ukufa kusihlukanisa. Ufuna ukuzibophezela kwesikhathi eside, okuholela ekugugeni ndawonye.
Kepha, izithiyo ezisendleleni yakho zingakuvimba ekufinyeleleni inhloso yakho. Ukunqoba kwabo, njengombhangqwana, kungakuqondisa endleleni efanele futhi.
Ukuze ufike lapho, kufanele zijwayeze okufanele ukwenze nokungafanele ukwenze ukuze ube nobuhlobo obanelisayo.
Ukwazi okufanele ukwenze nokungafanele ukwenze ukuze nihlale ndawonye ngokuzwana futhi nibe ndawonye isikhathi eside udlala indima ebalulekile ekuzizweni nigcwalisekile ebudlelwaneni.
Iresiphi yobudlelwano obunempilo nobenelisayo
Bonke ubudlelwano benziwa ngezithako ezahlukahlukene, ngakho-ke, ukuqhathanisa ubudlelwano bakho nobudlelwano bomunye umbhangqwana akunazithelo.
Nihlangane ngoba nichofoze. Unobudlelwano obunempilo nobenelisayo ngoba wabelana ngomgomo ofanayo wokuthi ufuna ubuhlobo bube njani.
Lokhu kuniletha nobabili ekhasini elilodwa. Yiziphi izithako zokuba nobudlelwano obunempilo nobenelisayo?
Ukuze ube nokuhlangenwe nakho okwanelisayo, udinga iresiphi yokuyiphila ngokwazi izithako okufanele uzenze nokungafanele uzifake kuzo.
Izindlela zobudlelwano obanelisayo
Okulandelayo yizinto zobudlelwano obanelisayo:
1. Gcina ukuxhumana okunemizwa okunengqondo
Ucwaningo lwe-Neurobiological lukhombisile ukuthi ukuphepha ngokomzwelo kubaluleke kakhulu ekugcineni ukuxhumana ngokomzwelo okunempilo nomlingani wakho. Yenza omunye nomunye azizwe ephephile ngokomzwelo, enelisekile ngokomoya, futhi ethandwa.
Ukuzizwa uthandwa kusho ukuthi umlingani wakho uyakwamukela futhi akwazise. Bakuqonda ngokuphelele futhi bakuthole. Awufuni ukuba khona komunye nomunye ukuze niphile ndawonye.
Ufuna ukutholakala ngokomzwelo komunye nomunye. Ukugcwaliseka ngokomzwelo kuzovala ibanga phakathi kwakho nomlingani wakho.
2. Yamukela ukungaboni ngaso linye okunenhlonipho
Izindlela ezimbili imibhangqwana ezisingatha futhi ixazulule ukungaboni ngaso linye ngazo zixoxa izinto buthule noma ziphakamise amazwi azo ukuze zithole iphuzu.
Akunandaba ukuthi uzisingatha kanjani izingxabano, qiniseka ukuthi ukuzenza ngendlela enenhlonipho futhi, okubaluleke kakhulu, ungaze uzesabe izingxabano.
Udinga ukuzizwa uvikelekile ukuze uziveze kumlingani wakho, bengesabi ukuthi bazophindisela kanjani. Ngokubambisana, phokophelani ukuthola izixazululo zezingxabano ngaphandle kokwehliswa isithunzi, ukuhlazeka, noma ukuphikelela ukuthi kulungile.
3. Gcina ubuhlobo bangaphandle, izinto ozilibazisa ngazo, nezinto ozithandayo
Umlingani wakho akakwazi ukuhlangabezana nazo zonke izidingo zakho, futhi nawe awukwazi ukuhlangabezana nezabo. Ngakho-ke, ukuba nalokhu okulindelwe okungenangqondo kubeka ubunzima obungadingekile komunye nomunye.
Ngokumangazayo, ukugcina inhlansi iphila, udinga ukugcina ubudlelwano bangaphandle, izinto zokuzilibazisa, nezintshisekelo ziphila.
Ungavumeli ubudlelwano bakho nomlingani wakho bukuqede kakhulu uze ugcine ulahlekelwe ubuwena.
Hlala uxhumekile nabangani bakho nomndeni wakho, bese uqhubeka nokwenza okuthandayo ngaphandle kobuhlobo bakho.
4. Lwela ukukhulumisana ngokwethembeka nokukhululekile
Ukuxhumana okuthembekile futhi okuvulelekile kungenye yezithako ezibaluleke kakhulu kunoma yibuphi ubuhlobo obanelisayo - noma ngabe kwenziwa nomlingani wakho, ingane, umzali, ingane yakini, noma umngani.
Lapho abantu ababili bekwazi ukuveza kahle ukwesaba, izidingo, nezifiso zabo komunye nomunye, kuqinisa isibopho futhi kukhulise ukwethembana phakathi kwabantu ababili.
5. Gxila kokuhle
Akekho ophelele. Nobabili nophathina wakho aniphelele. Wonke umuntu unezimfanelo ezingezinhle ngabo, kepha isizathu sokuba nobabili ukuthi izimfanelo ezinhle zidlula lezo ezingezinhle.
Uma kukhona ukungaboni ngaso linye noma ingxabano, kungokwemvelo yomuntu ukuthi ucabange ngezinto ezimbi kuqala bese ubeka okuhle kusishisi esingesihle.
Ngokuhlala ugxile ezicini ezingezinhle zobudlelwano, ubudlelwano ngeke buye ndawo.
Noma yinini lapho nizwa sengathi ubudlelwano benu busongelwa, niqonde futhi nizimisele ukutshelana lokho abakuthandayo ngomunye nomunye, kungani besafuna ukuba ndawonye, nokuthi bangaxazulula kanjani isimo ngokushesha okukhulu.
Okungafanele kwenziwe kobuhlobo obanelisayo
Okulandelayo okungafanele kwenziwe kobuhlobo obanelisayo:
1. Ukudlala ngobuthakathaka bomlingani wakho
Ungadlali ngobuthakathaka babo, kepha phinda njalo amandla abo.
Ngokuqhubeka ubatshele ukuthi benzani okungalungile, wehlisa umdlandla wabo wokwenza noma yini efanele.
Ucindezela ukuzethemba kwabo ngokukhomba njalo okungalungile kubo. Esikhundleni salokho hlala phansi nabo nixoxe ngokuthi bangenza kanjani izinto ngokuhlukile ebudlelwaneni.
2. Ukuziphindiselela kumlingani wakho
Ukuziphindiselela ngalokho okungenzeka ukuthi umlingani wakho akwenzile kabi kuyinto encane, futhi ayikho indlela engcono yokubeka lokho.
Ufuna ukugwema umjikelezo wempindiselo - uziphindiselela, baziphindiselela, wena, bona, njalonjalo.
Njalo baphathe ngendlela ofuna bakuphathe ngayo, kungakhathalekile ukuthi bakwenza kanjani kuwe. Ungalokothi ungene ebudlelwaneni ngoba lokho kusho ukubhujiswa.
3. Ukushaya izinto ngokulingana
Zijwayeze ukucabanga.
Hlala phansi wedwa uzindle ngesimo sonke ngaphambi kokuba uthukuthele noma ucibilike. Ungalokothi ucabange noma ucabangisise ngesimo ngaphambi kokukhuluma nomlingani wakho.
Ungavumeli ukwesaba nokungaqiniseki kwakho kukufice. Uma uzizwa sengathi isimo sinzima kakhulu, zibuze ukuthi kufanele yini ukubeka engcupheni ubudlelwano bakho bonke.
4. Ukulingisa ngenxa yokuphelelwa yithemba
Ngaphambi kokwenza noma isiphi isinqumo, cabanga ngaso izikhathi eziningi ngaphambi kokuthi wenze leso sinqumo.
Ukwenza ngenxa yokuphelelwa yithemba kuholela osizini olwengeziwe. Kwesinye isikhathi, abantu baba nesifiso esikhulu sokuthi abalingani babo bashintshe baze baye ekusongeleni isehlukaniso noma ukwahlukana.
Engqondweni yakho, ucabanga ukuthi ukubasongela ngesehlukaniso noma ngokwahlukana kuzobaphoqa ukuthi bashintshe, kepha uma kwenzeka bevuma, kuzokukhathaza kakhulu, ngoba lokho bekungasikho obekuhlosile.
Ngamafuphi, ungavumeli imizwa yakho ikulawule.
Uma kungekho lutho olusebenzayo futhi ufuna ukusebenzela ebudlelwaneni bakho ukubuthuthukisa, ungahlala njalo ufuna ukwelulekwa ngomshado noma kwabashadile.
Ingakusiza ukuthi ubhekane nezingxabano futhi ufike esinqumweni. Uma nobabili nizimisele, umeluleki anganisiza ukuthi ningeze izithako ezifanele ebudlelwaneni benu.
Futhi Buka: