-Delile
- 1. Zinike isikhathi sokuba wedwa
- 2. Yenza uhlu
- 3. Xhuma kabusha nohlelo lwakho lokusekela
- 4. Iya kancane kwezothando
- 5. Khulumisana nomlingani wakho
- 6. Umlingani wakho akayona i-ex yakho
- 7. Thembela emvelweni yakho
- 8. Shintsha umbono wakho
Ubudlelwano busithinta ezingeni elijulile, ngakho-ke akumangazi ukuthi lapho ubudlelwano buhamba kabi, kungenza kube nzima ukuba sengozini nomuntu omusha bese uqala ukwakha ukwethembana ngemuva kobudlelwano obubi ngokushesha. Lapho umlingani ephula ukwethemba kwakho noma ekukhaphela ngokungathembeki kungenza kube nzima ukubeka ukholo lwakho kumlingani othandana naye. Ungaba nezinkinga zokuthembana ngenkathi usalulama ebudlelwaneni obubi.
Ukubuyisa ebudlelwaneni obunobuthi kuyinto engcono kakhulu ongazenzela yona. Kepha ukushiya umlingani onobuthi kungakwenza uzizwe uqaphile ngokuqala ubudlelwano obusha. Noma ufuna ukuthanda nokwethemba omunye umuntu, ukukwenza kwenzeke kuzwakala kuyimpi yokukhuphuka.
Ukufunda ukuthembana futhi ngemuva kobudlelwano obubi kungazama bobabili abalingani, kepha ngomzamo omncane, ungaba nobudlelwano obusha obuphumelelayo. Ungavumeli okwenzeke esikhathini esedlule kuthinte ubudlelwano bakho besikhathi esizayo.
Kepha, wakha kanjani ukwethembana ebudlelwaneni futhi? Nazi izinyathelo eziyi-8 zokwakha ukwethembeka ngemuva kobuhlobo obubi.
1. Zinike isikhathi sokuba wedwa
Ukushiya ubudlelwano obubi kunzima, kepha ukwakha ukwethembana ngemuva kobudlelwano obubi kulukhuni. Lezi zinhlobo zabalingani zingalimaza i-ego yakho, impilo yakho yengqondo, kanye nokukwazi kwakho ukwethemba. Kuwukuhlakanipha ukuzinika isikhathi esithile ngemuva kokuphuma ebudlelwaneni obubi ngaphambi kokuphishekela enye inkanuko yothando.
Ukuzinika isikhathi sakho kukunikeza ithuba lokuthi uzazi. Ungasebenzisa lesi sikhathi ukudabukisa ubudlelwano bakho obudlule, ukuqala umdlalo wokuzilibazisa, ukuxhumana kabusha nabangane, ukuhamba, ukugxila emsebenzini wakho, noma usebenzise leso sikhathi ukuphumula.
2. Yenza uhlu
Manje njengoba ubukade usebudlelwaneni obubi, wazi kangcono ukuthi yini ozoyivumela futhi ongeke uyibekezelele ebudlelwaneni obusha obuya phambili.
Abaningi bakuthola kuwusizo ukwenza uhlu lwezimfanelo ezinhle abangathanda ukuzibona kumlingani wothando wesikhathi esizayo kanye nohlu lokuziphatha, imikhuba, kanye nezici ongeke uzibekezelele kothile.
3. Xhuma kabusha nohlelo lwakho lokusekela
Ukugcina ubudlelwano bakho nabangani nomndeni kungaba nzima uma usebudlelwaneni obubi. Owayengumdala wakho kungenzeka uthathe isikhathi sakho esiningi, esikuhlukanise nohlelo lwakho lokusekela. Lokhu kuvamile ebudlelwaneni obunobuthi ngoba kukuphoqa ukuthi uncike ngokuphelele kowawushade naye.
Manje njengoba usukhululekile ethonyeni labo elibi, sekuyisikhathi sokuxhumana kabusha nabathandekayo bakho. Lobu budlelwano buzokusiza ukuthi welaphe ekuhlukaneni kwakho, futhi buzokufundisa ukuthi kunabantu abathembekile laphaya ukuze uqhubekele phambili kalula ungakha ukwethembana ebudlelwaneni obusha.
Bazosebenza njengohlelo lokusekela oluqinile ukukubona kunoma yiziphi izilingo ezingase zivele empilweni yakho.
4. Iya kancane kwezothando
Ukuthi manje awukashadi akusho ukuthi kufanele ungene ebudlelwaneni obusha. Uma ungakakulungeli ukuba sebudlelwaneni, ungaphishekeli umuntu njengesaphulelo. Akukuhle kuwe, futhi akulungile ekuchotsheniweni kwakho.
Uma usukulungele ukuba nomuntu omusha, zinike isikhathi sakho. Ukwakha ukwethembana ngemuva kobudlelwano obubi kungadinga imizamo ephindaphindwayo nabalingani abahlukene ngaphambi kokuthola umuntu ongazimisela naye. Qaphela umlingani wakho omusha bese usebenzisa ikhanda lakho nenhliziyo yakho uze ukwazi ukubethemba.
5. Khulumisana nomlingani wakho
Noma ngabe uqala ubudlelwano obusha noma ubenomuntu iminyaka, ukuxhumana kuzoba ithuluzi lakho elibaluleke kakhulu lokugcina isibopho esinempilo. Uma uqala ubudlelwano obusha, kufanele ukhulume ngokukhululekile nomlingani wakho ngobudlelwano bakho bokugcina.
Batshele ukuthi umlingani wakho ukuphathe kanjani, ukuthi uzizwe kanjani, futhi uchaze ngokwethembeka kumlingani wakho mayelana nokuthi ungacasulwa kanjani ukuziphatha okuthile noma imishwana isikhashana.
Ukuvuleleka ngezinkinga zakho zokwethembana kuzosiza umlingani wakho asebenze nawe ukusiza ukwakha ukwethembana kanye nesisekelo esiqinile sobudlelwano bakho esikhundleni sokusebenza ngokumelene nawe.
6. Umlingani wakho akayona i-ex yakho
Uma ufuna ukufunda ukwakha ukwethembana ngemuva kobudlelwano obubi, kuzodingeka uzikhumbuze ukuthi umlingani wakho akayona i-ex yakho. Abenzanga lutho ukukwenza ubuze ubuqotho babo noma uthando lwabo ngawe.
Lokhu kuliqiniso lokuthi kungadingeka ukuthi ungene engqondweni yakho amahlandla amaningi futhi ufunde izindlela zokuthi ungamethemba kanjani umuntu ebudlelwaneni ngaphambi kwekhanda lakho futhi nenhliziyo yakho ibona izinto ngendlela efanayo.
7. Thembela emvelweni yakho
Uma ufuna ukufunda ukuthi ungakwakha kanjani ukwethembana ngemuva kobudlelwano obubi kufanele ufunde ukuthi ungazethemba kanjani wena kuqala. Ubudlelwano obubi abuvamisile ukuqala ngaleyo ndlela. Ekuqaleni, kungenzeka ukuthi wajabula kakhulu nomlingani wakho. Kungenzeka ucabange nokuthi zikulungele. Kepha ngokuhamba kwesikhathi ubudlelwano baba nobuthi kini nobabili.
Ngesikhathi sobuthi ebudlelwaneni bakho, ungahle ube nomuzwa wokuzwa ukuthi kukhona okungahambi kahle. Awuzange uyithande indlela obukade uphathwa ngayo noma wavuma ukuthi indlela obuziphathisa ngayo ibingeyona impilo.Kungenzeka ukuthi ungayinakanga le mizwa yamathumbu ngoba ubufuna ukusindisa ubudlelwano.
Okwamanje, funda ukwethemba imizwa yakho yesisu futhi uqhubekele phambili kwimizwelo yakho. Uma okuthile kungazizwa kahle, biza umlingani wakho ngakho. Kulokhu, lalelisisa amafulegi abomvu.
Ngakolunye uhlangothi, uma isisu sakho sikutshela ukuthi umlingani wakho omusha ukufanele ukwethemba, hamba nakho. Ungabajezisi ngamaphutha ophathina wakho owedlule uma singekho isisekelo sawo.
8. Shintsha umbono wakho
Uma uqhubeka uzitshela ukuthi bonke abesifazane banamanga noma ukuthi wonke amadoda ayaqola, ungaqala ukukukholwa. Uma ufuna ukufunda ukwethemba umuntu omusha, kuzofanela ushintshe indlela obheka ngayo ubudlelwano. Ungavumeli i-apula elilodwa lonakalise lonke iqembu, noma ngabe lelo apula belibolile kakhulu.
Vumela umlingani wakho omusha akukhombise ukuthi bangumuntu onokwethenjelwa nokuthi unentshisekelo enkulu engqondweni.
Indlela oziphathe ngayo ebudlelwaneni obunobuthi ingakushiya uzizwe ungathembi umlingani omusha, kepha ungafunda ukwethemba umlingani wakho ngemuva kobuhlobo obuhlulekile?
Impendulo yalo mbuzo ilula impela. Ngokuzenzela isikhathi sakho, ukuxhumana ngokukhululekile nomlingani wakho omusha, nokubekezela okuningi ungafunda ukwakha ukwethembana ngemuva kobudlelwano obubi.