-Delile
- 1. Sebenzisa induku yokukhuluma
- 2. Buzana imibuzo
- 3. Zijwayezeni ukubukelana ngamazwi omunye nomunye
- 4. Vala ifoni yakho
- 5. Bhalelana incwadi
Izinkinga zokuxhumana emshadweni zingavela ngisho nasemishadweni eqinile. Ngemuva kwakho konke, sonke singabantu, futhi akekho kithi ofunda ingqondo.
Ukungezwani, imizwa ebuhlungu, namaphuzu alahlekile kuyingxenye nobukhulu banoma ibuphi ubuhlobo babantu, futhi umshado uhlukile.
Ukubhekana nezindaba zokuxhumana emshadweni ngokushesha lapho zivela kuyikhono elibalulekile emshadweni wakho nekusasa lakho ndawonye.
Kulula kakhulu ukuthi izinkinga zokuxhumana emshadweni zikhule futhi ziphenduke intukuthelo, futhi ubuhlungu besikhathi eside bubuhlungu.
Uyazi uma ushaye inkinga yokuxhumana ngobudlelwano, kuba khona umuzwa wokungezwani nokuthile okungagculisi.
Ungahle ulwe kakhulu kunokujwayelekile, noma ungakhulumi kakhulu nhlobo. Nilokhu nilahlekelwa incazelo yomunye nomunye. Izicelo ziyalahleka, ukungezwani kudlangile, futhi kungakabiphi, nobabili nizizwa nikhungathekile.
Ungahle uzibuze ukuthi sesifikile yini isikhathi sokuhlukanisa noma sokuhlukanisa.
Kwesinye isikhathi indlela engcono yokuxazulula inkinga yokuxhumana ngomshado ukuthatha indlela entsha sha. Mhlawumbe uke wazama iseluleko esivamile esithi “khulumisanani nje” noma “zamani ukubona umbono womunye umuntu.”
Akukho lutho olungahambi kahle ngalokho - phela, ukukhuluma nokulalela kuyizindlela zokuxhumana eziphumelelayo kanye nomgogodla wokuxhumana okuhle emshadweni- kodwa kwesinye isikhathi, isimo sidinga okuhlukile.
Buka le vidiyo ukuze wazi izindlela ezi-3 ezilula zokwenza ngcono ukuxhumana ngokushesha emshadweni wakho.
Uma ulwa nokushoda kokuxhumana ebudlelwaneni noma ukungabikho kokuxhumana emshadweni, zama eyodwa noma ngaphezulu yalezi zinqubo ezinhlanu zokuxhumana ezingalindelekile zemibhangqwana ukuxazulula izinkinga zokuxhumana emshadweni.
1. Sebenzisa induku yokukhuluma
Lokhu kuzwakala kuphumile emgqeni futhi kungahle kuveze izithombe zokudansa uzungeze umlilo wekamu onezimpaphe ezinweleni zakho ngenkathi ugqoke isiketi se-boho kodwa usibekezelele isikhashana.
Induku yokukhuluma isho ukuthi umuntu ophethe induku kuphela ongakhuluma. Vele, akudingeki ukuthi ibe yinduku yangempela, futhi akudingeki ushaye i-hippie emporium eseduzane nawe (ngaphandle kokuthi leyo yinto yakho, uma kunjalo, yenzele).
Mane ukhethe into bese uyavuma ukuthi noma ngubani ophetheyo, nguyena okhulumayo, bese omunye umuntu elalela.
Kubalulekile ukuthi ungathwalwa bese uphendulela induku yokukhuluma ibe yinduku ebabayo. Yisho ucezu lwakho, bese ulunikezela ngomusa bese uvumela umlingani wakho abe nethuba.
Enye indlela yale ndlela kungaba ukusetha isibali sikhathi sesikhathi esivunyelwene ngaso (kungaba imizuzu emi-5 noma eyi-10), bese ngamunye wenu athole ithuba lokusho ucezu lwakhe ngenkathi omunye elalele ngenkuthalo.
2. Buzana imibuzo
Ukuxhumana kuyisihluthulelo ebudlelwaneni, futhi aukuskena ngemibuzo kuyindlela enhle yokwenza ngcono ukuxhumana emshadweni. Kulula kakhulu ukucabanga ukuthi umlingani wethu ucabangani bese sisekela imizwa yethu nezinqumo zethu kulokho.
Kepha kuthiwani uma bebecabanga enye into ngokuphelele? Kuthiwani uma ucabanga ukuthi bebengakhiphi udoti ngoba bevilapha kanti empeleni iqiniso ukuthi bakhathele? Ukuphela kwendlela yokwazi ukubabuza.
Hlalani phansi nophathina wakho nishintshane ngokubuzana imibuzo nokulalelisisa izimpendulo. Ungabuza ngezinkinga ezithile onazo, noma vele ubuze imibuzo ejwayelekile ukuze ube nomkhuba wokulalela.
3. Zijwayezeni ukubukelana ngamazwi omunye nomunye
Thembeka, ngabe uke wacisha nje lapho umlingani wakho ekhuluma? Noma uzithole ulinde ngesineke ithuba lakho lokukhuluma?
Sonke senze uhlu lwezinto okufanele zenziwe ngenkathi umlingani wethu kwesinye isikhathi ekhuluma.
Akuyona into embi ukuyenza - kukhombisa nje ukuthi izingqondo zethu zimatasa futhi kuningi okumele sikwenze - kepha akuhambisani nendlela yokukhulumisana kangcono ebudlelwaneni.
Esikhundleni sokuvumela ingqondo yakho izule, zama ‘Ukulingisa’ njengo umsebenzi wokuxhumana womshado ukuxhumana nomlingani wakho.
Kulokuzivocavoca, ngamunye wenu uyashintshana ngokulalela omunye, kuthi lapho isipikha samanje senziwe, umlaleli abukise amagama abo.
Ngakho-ke ngokwesibonelo, uma umlingani wakho edinga ukukhuluma ngokunakekelwa kwezingane, ungalalela ngokucophelela bese uphendula ngokuthi "Kulokhu engikuzwayo, ngithola ukuthi uzizwa sengathi uthatha umthwalo omkhulu wokunakekela izingane, futhi lokho kuyakucindezela ukuphuma? ”
Yenza lokhu ngaphandle kokwahlulela. Mane ulalele bese uzibuko. Nobabili niyozizwa nisebenza ngokwengeziwe futhi nibe nokuqonda okujulile komunye nomunye, futhi.
4. Vala ifoni yakho
Izingcingo zethu zitholakala kuyo yonke indawo kulezi zinsuku ukuthi ukuskrola kuzo noma ukuphendula yonke into oyizwayo iba yinto yesibili.
Kodwa-ke, ukuba umlutha kwethu kwezingcingo kungadla lubi ebudlelwaneni bethu futhi kudale ukungabi khona kokuxhumana emshadweni.
Uma uhlala usocingweni lwakho, noma uphazamisa ingxoxo eqhubekayo ukuze “uhlole nje lokho” lapho uzwa isaziso, kunzima ukuba khona ngokugcwele nomlingani wakho.
Ukuphazamiseka kuba yindlela yokuphila, futhi lokho kudala izinkinga zokuxhumana emshadweni.
Zama ukucisha izingcingo zakho ngesikhathi esivunyelwene ngaso, njengehora ubusuku ngabunye, noma njalo ngeSonto ntambama.
5. Bhalelana incwadi
Uzibuza ukuthi ungaxhumana kanjani nobudlelwano noma ungaxhumana kanjani noshade naye?
Kwesinye isikhathi kunzima ukusho lokho ofuna ukukusho, noma ukugxila kulokho umlingani wakho okudingeka akusho kuwe.
Ukubhala incwadi kuyindlela enhle yokugxila emicabangweni nasemizweni yakho, futhi ungacabanga ukuthi ungaziveza kanjani, ngakho-ke ucacile futhi uthembekile ngaphandle kokuba nonya noma intukuthelo.
Ukufunda incwadi kudinga ukugxila nokugxila futhi kukukhuthaze ukuthi ulalele amazwi ophathina wakho. Vele khumbula ukugcina izincwadi zakho zihloniphekile futhi zimnene - aziyona imoto yokukhipha ukukhungatheka.
Izinkinga zokuxhumana emshadweni azisho ukuphela kobudlelwano, ikakhulukazi umshado. Zama amasu ahlukile hhayi kungekudala, uzofunda ukuxhumana ngokucacile futhi ubhekane nezinkinga zakho ndawonye.