-Delile
- Kuyinhlanganisela yezinto eziningi
- Ubudala kuqhathaniswa nokulungela - isici se-biology
- Isici senhlalo
- Uhlu lokuhlola lwezempilo
- Uhlu lokuhlola lwezezimali
- Uhlu lokuhlola ngokomzwelo
- Khuluma ngezingane
- Khuluma ngobudlelwano bakho
- Khuluma nabangane
- Isinqumo sokugcina
Abantu banquma kanjani ukuba nezingane? Ingabe kuyindaba yokuhlaziya ngokunengqondo ukukhetha, noma kungokwemvelo kuphela?
Kuyinhlanganisela yezinto eziningi
Abanye abantu bebelokhu bazi ukuthi bafuna ukuba ngabazali. Abanye ngokungalindelekile bathola lokho okwaziwa ngokuthi yi- “baby fever,” okuyinto yangempela kubo bonke ubulili. Futhi abanye bafuna izingane ngenxa yokulindela komphakathi.
Kodwa-ke noma ngabe sinamandla kangakanani isifiso sokuba nenqwaba yenjabulo ethandekayo, kunokucatshangelwa okuthile abantu okufanele bakulinganise ngaphambi kokuthatha igxathu. Lokhu kufaka phakathi izinto ongeke uzilawule, njengeminyaka yakho; kodwa futhi nezinsizakusebenza okufanele uzihlole —izimali, impilo nokuzimisela ngokomzwelo.
Ubudala kuqhathaniswa nokulungela - isici se-biology
Enye yezinto ezibaluleke kakhulu ukuxoxa nomlingani wakho ukuthi zingaki izingane ozifunayo ngenkathi ucabangela iminyaka yakho.
Uma ufuna ukuba nezingane eziningi, ngokuvamile uzoba nethuba elingcono uma uqala ukuba mncane. ENetherlands, i-Erasmus University Medical Center ithole imingcele yeminyaka efanelekile yosayizi womndeni. Ezinganeni ezi-2 ezingenayo i-IVF, abantu kufanele baqale imindeni yabo ngeminyaka yobudala engama-27 ngokumangazayo.
Kukhona nezindlela eziningi zosizo lokuzala kulezi zinsuku. IVF iyatholakala. Ukuqanda amaqanda akho manje ukuze uwasebenzise lapho usumdala manje kungenzeka. Kusetshenziswa inketho ngokwesivumelwano. Ukutholwa kungenye into engenzeka.
Isici senhlalo
Kodwa-ke, akufanele ube nengane ngoba nje uneminyaka ethile yobudala.
Ochwepheshe bayavuma ukuthi ukulungela impilo, ezezimali nezomzwelo kufanele kudlale indima enkulu esinqumweni sakho kuneminyaka yobudala kuphela.
Unalokho engqondweni, nazi ezinye izinto okufanele uzigcine engqondweni uma wena nomlingani wakho nicabanga ngokuba nomndeni:
Uhlu lokuhlola lwezempilo
Imibhangqwana enempilo inethuba elingcono lokuba nengane enempilo, ngakho-ke ngaphambi kokuba ukhulelwe, lawula impilo yakho ngangokunokwenzeka ngalezi zincomo.
- Thola ukuhlolwa kwezithandani kusengaphambili. UMashi weDimes uncoma ukuthi ukhulume ngomlando wezempilo yomndeni wakho kanye nanoma yiziphi izimo zofuzo ongahle uziphathe.
- Omama: qala ukuthatha ivithamini ngaphambi kokubeletha.
- Kokubili: Finyelela isisindo esinempilo ne-BMI yakho.
- Kokubili: nciphisa i-caffeine, utshwala nezidakamizwa ezingekho emthethweni. Ngaphandle kwalokho, qiniseka ukuthi noma imiphi imishanguzo oyisebenzisayo ngeke ithinte ukukhulelwa uma kuyindlela oyithathayo. Uma wena noma umlingani wakho unesimo esingelapheki sempilo esidinga ukuthi uphuze imithi engadala ukukhubazeka kokuzalwa, qhamuka nohlelo lokukhulelwa oluzoqinisekisa uhambo oluphephile lokukhulelwa.
- Gcina umbono oqondile lapho ungakwazi khona. Izidakamizwa notshwala kucace bha kwabaningi, kepha bewazi yini ukuthi i-caffeine eningi ithinta kabi isidoda? Kuyenzeka.
Uhlu lokuhlola lwezezimali
- Bheka zonke izimpahla zakho, imali engenayo, izikweletu, nezindleko zakho ukuze wazi ukuthi uqala kuphi. Thola umbiko wakho wamahhala waminyaka yonke wesikweletu ukuze uthole isibambo kwezezimali zakho.
- Uma wazi ukuthi uzosebenzisa i-IVF, i-surrogate, noma olunye usizo lokuzala, thola ukuthi imuphi umshuwalense ozowukhokhela futhi ongeke uwukhokhele esifundazweni sakho.
- Cabanga ngesimo sakho sokuphila nemoto. Ingabe uhlala eduze nomndeni njengamanje — uma kungenjalo, manje isikhathi esifanele sokusondela? Ingabe isikhala sakho samanje sinendawo eyanele yengane noma uzodinga ukuqala usesho olusha lwamafulethi njengamanje? Ingabe imoto yakho yamanje inendawo eyanele yesihlalo sezinsana, noma ngabe udinga ukuqala ukufuna imoto entsha? Manje yisikhathi sokuthola lokhu.
- Khokha isikweletu. Uma ukhokha izikweletu ezimbalwa, kufanele ube nemali eningi.
- Gcina isiguqo esincane. Abahleli abaningi bezezimali bancoma ukonga izinyanga eziyisithupha kuya kweziyisishiyagalombili zenzuzo ukukhokhela izindleko zakho ezidingekayo uma kunesimo esiphuthumayo, ukugula, noma ukudilizwa emsebenzini.
- Bhekana namaqiniso ngezindleko. Umndeni owodwa kwemithathu manje uchitha amaphesenti angama-20 noma ngaphezulu emholweni wawo waminyaka yonke wokunakekela izingane. Lokho akulona ihlaya!
- Yiba nohlelo lokunakekela izingane. Uyazi ukuthi malini izindleko zenkulisa endaweni yangakini? Qala ukubheka abahlinzeki futhi uthole umbono wezinketho ezahlukahlukene.
- Ngabe omunye wenu ufuna ukuhlala ekhaya nengane, futhi angakwazi yini ukukhokhela? Kulokhu, kufanele wenze ukuhlaziywa kwezindleko. Ngabe ukunakekelwa kwezingane kuzobiza imali ethe xaxa noma ecishe ifane naleyo oyiholayo? Ngemuva kwalokho ungahle uthande ukuhlala ekhaya. Kepha uma uncike kumshuwalense wezempilo womsebenzi wakho nezinye izinzuzo, lapho-ke kungadingeka ukuthi ubuyele emsebenzini.
Kufanele futhi ulinganise ukuthi unabo yini ubuntu bokuba ngumzali ohlala ekhaya — abanye abantu bakhetha ukuphuma ekhaya, futhi akukho lutho olungalungile ngalokho.
Uhlu lokuhlola ngokomzwelo
Lapho usuthole ukuthi usukulungele ngokwezimali nangezempilo, manje usungahlola ukuthi ngabe wena nomlingani wakho nikulungele yini ukuba ngumzali ngokomzwelo.
Nizofuna ukukhetha isikhathi lapho nobabili nizokwazi ukuphumula, ngakho-ke mhlawumbe nithathe umlingani wakho niyodla naye isidlo sakusihlwa. Sebenzisa lolu hlu njengesiqalo sengxoxo ethembekile, esengozini mayelana namathemba akho nokwesaba mayelana nokuba ngumzali.
Khuluma ngezingane
- Uyakujabulela ukuchitha isikhathi nezingane?
- Cabanga emuva ebuntwaneni bakho bese ukhuluma ngalokho okuthandile nongakuthandi. Uzofana kanjani nabazali bakho? Okuhlukile?
- Ngabe wena nomlingani wakho nithathe isinqumo sokuthi nizokhulisa ingane yenu enkolweni ethile nakwezinye izindinganiso?
Khuluma ngobudlelwano bakho
Ingabe usukulungele ukuthi ukuba ngumzali kuzobuguqula kanjani ubudlelwano bakho? Ubudlelwano obuqinile ngokuvamile buhlala buqinile futhi obuthakathaka buvamise ukuba buthakathaka.
Imibhangqwana eminingi ikhomba izinyanga zokuqala ezimbalwa zobuzali njengezicindezela kakhulu njengoba kufanele ujwayele izindima zakho ezintsha, umntwana wakho omusha, futhi mhlawumbe ululame ekubelethweni konke ngasikhathi sinye. Ngabe nobabili nizimisele ngokusebenza kanzima kubuzali nasebudlelwaneni benu? Ungakwazi yini ukuba nezingxoxo ezinengqondo ngezinkinga zakho?
Manje yisikhathi sokuxazulula noma yiziphi izinkinga esezinesikhathi eside zikhona.
Khuluma nabangane
Okulandelayo, qoqa imininingwane eminingi kubangani abangabazali. Khetha ubuchopho babo, futhi. Cela ingxoxo eqotho ngezimpilo zabo ukuze ubone ukuthi bathanda ini, yini abangayithandi, nokuthi yini abafisa ukuyazi.
Isinqumo sokugcina
Ukunquma ukuba nengane kuthonywa yizinto eziningi, kepha akunakuncishiselwa kumqondo ophusile. Kuyindaba yokuthi wena nomlingani wakho nizizwa kanjani ngokushintsha kwendlela yokuphila nokuthi ubuhlobo benu buqine ngokwanele yini ukubhekana nenselelo.