-Delile
- Isimiso sokuthandana # 1: Phatha okulindele
- Isimiso sokuthandana # 2: Zibekele imigomo yakho
- Isimiso sokuthandana # 3: Qondanisa izenzo zakho nezinhloso zakho
- Isimiso sokuthandana # 4: Ungazikhawuleli
- Isimiso sokuthandana # 5: Yiba nethemba
- Isimiso sokuphola # 6: Ukubonga yisoso eliyimfihlo
- Isimiso sokuthandana # 7: Hamba ebusweni bokwesaba
Uma ubheka okushiwo ‘yisimiso,’ kusho ukuthi “iqiniso eliyisisekelo noma isiphakamiso esisebenza njengesisekelo sohlelo lwenkolelo noma lokuziphatha - noma lokulandelana kwezizathu.” Kungumthetho, noma indinganiso okufanele isebenze ngayo.
Yikuphi into exakile abantu abaningi okufanele bayicabangele uma kukhulunywa ngokuthandana, ikakhulukazi lapho iningi lethu selibekelwe ukuzonda imithetho?
Kepha uma besinezimiso zethu zokujola ebesizisebenzisa njengesiqondisi esinenjongo yemisebenzi yethu yokuqomisana, besingeke sidingise ukujola ngokungahleliwe ngenkathi sithemba ukuthi singafika kule ndawo ngokusitholela umlingani omuhle nophelele kithi phakathi kolwandle abantu futhi.
Esikhundleni salokho, singenza izinqumo ezingcono mayelana nokuthi sisisebenzisa kanjani isikhathi sethu esiyigugu nokugxila, futhi singahle sizihlanganise nabantu abalungile.
Manje lokho kunengqondo, akunjalo?
Sifake imigomo eyi-7 yokuphola khona lapha ongathanda ukuyisebenzisa njengesiqondiso sempilo yakho yokuqomisana, noma lokho kungakugqugquzela ukuthi uzakhele (nokulinda) inguqulo yakho.
Isimiso sokuthandana # 1: Phatha okulindele
Ngesizathu esithile esingajwayelekile, sihlala sinombono odidekile nokulindelwe okungenangqondo uma kukhulunywa ngokuthandana, ukukhetha umlingani nokuthi sibubona kanjani ubudlelwane obujabulisayo nobunempilo.
Minan Iqiniso, uthando nomshado ngeke kuphume ngendlela efanayo neDisney ethanda ukuyiveza.
Futhi umfana noma intombazane ongaqhaqhazeli nayo ingahle ikuqhume ngokwanga kokuqala, noma isikhathi esithe xaxa.
Esikhundleni sokuvumela inkanuko yethu isiqondise singama ukucabanga ngalokho esikulindele ebudlelwaneni nakumlingani wethu bese siqala ukugxila ekutholeni lokho esikhundleni sokuphazanyiswa yi-glitz nobukhazikhazi bezimonyo ezithile, izingubo ezinhle noma umsebenzi ijimu!
Ukuchitha isikhathi ucabanga ukuthi hlobo luni lobudlelwano esilufunayo nokuthi kungani sikufuna lokho. Kanye nocwaningo lokuqonda ukuthi ngabe ubudlelwane bethu obukhethiwe bungokoqobo yini kuzokusiza ukuthi ubone umehluko phakathi kwalokho ocabanga ukuthi ufuna, nokuthi yini oyifunayo ngempela. Lokhu kuzokusiza ukuthi ubheke lezi zimfanelo ezibalulekile kuzakwethu kunokuba ufune inkanuko, noma ukukhanga lapho uqala ukubonana.
Isikhathi esichithwe kahle kanye nenqubo ephelele yokuqomisana - okuzokugcina usendleleni eya osukwini lwakho lwamaphupho.
Isimiso sokuthandana # 2: Zibekele imigomo yakho
Awuphumi ohambweni lwemoto endaweni ethile ungazi ukuthi uyaphi, futhi uma wenza kanjalo, uzobe uziyekela uvulekele noma yini ewela endleleni yakho (futhi ungahle uphuthelwe amakhulu ezindawo ezikhuthazayo endleleni).
Kuyafana nokuphola.
Qala ukubhala phansi okufunayo, ukuthi ufuna bani, hlobo luni lwezimfanelo abanazo, nizophathana kanjani, nifuna uhlobo luni lwempilo futhi nizoqala ukudonsela lowo muntu kini.
Cacisa ngangokunokwenzeka lapho ubeka izinhloso futhi uqhubeke nokuzihlaziya njengoba ushintsha futhi ukhula.
Kepha ungayakheli ezinganekwaneni, yakhele kokungokoqobo futhi ubhekane namaqiniso.
Ngokuphazima kweso, uzocacelwa ukuthi ufunani nokuthi ufuna bani, futhi uzothumela umyalezo ocacile kakhulu kuNkulunkulu noma kuMdali ngalokho okufunayo ukuze bakusize usule indlela yakho futhi uziqondanise imigomo yakho. Okusiholela kahle esimisweni sokuthandana # 3!
Isimiso sokuthandana # 3: Qondanisa izenzo zakho nezinhloso zakho
Abantu abaningi banesitayela sokunamathisela esingavikelekile futhi okuhlangenwe nakho kwethu empilweni kuthonya indlela esixhumana ngayo nabanye - kokuhle noma okubi.
Imvamisa akubona abalingani bethu okufanele basolwe ngezinkinga esinazo ebudlelwaneni okwethu.
Ukube besazi ukuthi yini esiyifunayo (bona umgomo wokuphola # 1) bese sizimisela ukuma ngezifiso zethu futhi sithole esikufunayo lapho-ke sesimaphakathi lapho. Inkinga elandelayo esingayithola ukuthi singangena kanjani kweyethu indlela uma kuziwa ekutholeni umlingani ophelele.
Ngakho-ke, kulapho uqala khona ukugxila kokuthi kungani ungalandeli umgwaqo oya kulokho okufunayo. Kungani uheha abantu abangalungile (noma sizosho ukuthi kungani ukhangwa abantu abangalungile) nokuthi ungakulungisa kanjani lokhu.
Ukusebenzela lokhu ekugcineni kuzokuholela ekubeni sendaweni ekahle ngokwengqondo, ngokomzwelo nangokomzimba ukuheha nokugcina umlingani ofanele wena.
Azikho izinganekwane lapha nginovalo nje, ngiyacela, ukuziqhenya okuthile.
Isimiso sokuthandana # 4: Ungazikhawuleli
Abantu abakudaluli konke okuphathelene nabo ngokushesha. Awuzivezi ngokwakho kubantu ngokushesha futhi.
Uma uke wathandana nothile, futhi uyamthanda kodwa namanje awunaso isiqiniseko sokwethembeka, mtshele, bese ubabuza ukuthi ngabe nisengakwazi yini ukubonana ukuze nazi kabanzi ngomunye nomunye. Ngaphandle kwalokho, ungaphuthelwa ukujula kwabo okufihlekile okungavele kuhambisane nokwakho.
Ngeke wazi ukuthi uma wenza lokhu kungahle kungadingeki ubukeke kanzima ukuthola lowo muntu ophelele futhi awufuni ukuthumela imiyalezo noma imithandazo ukuthola umuntu ophelele kuphela ukwenqaba izipho ezilethwa kuwe ngokushesha wena?
Khumbula, futhi, ukuthola umlingani ngumdlalo wezinombolo, kuzofanele uphume ungene endaweni yokuphola ukuze uthole umuntu - mhlawumbe ngeke baze bangqongqoze emnyango wakho bezokucela.
Ngakho-ke uma ungaphumi okuningi, qala ukuthola ukuthi ungangena kanjani phambi kwabantu abaningi futhi wandise inethiwekhi yakho yokuxhumana.
Isimiso sokuthandana # 5: Yiba nethemba
Ungapheli amandla, qhubeka ubukeza futhi ubuyekeze izinhloso zakho nokulindelwe, cabanga ngokuhlangenwe nakho kwakho maqondana nezinhloso zakho nokulindele, bese ushintsha izinguquko.
Hlola ukuthi kungani ucabanga ukuthi wenzani, isibonelo, ungowesifazane olinde indoda ethile ukuthi ikucele. Ngabe uzomvumela ngempela umuntu ongahle akulungele ukuthi adlule kumgomo wezenhlalo ongabalulekile njengalona? Angesaba, ukubuza kodwa lokho akusho ukuthi ubuthakathaka.
Ungahle udinge ukulungisa izinhloso zakho, nokulindelwe noma ungadinga ukuzithuthukisa ukuze uhambisane nomlingani wakho ophelele futhi kufanelekile ukwenza njalo.
Ukuqomisana kungahle kube mnandi nemidlalo ebusheni bakho kepha ngesikhathi esithile, kujika kube kubi. Lokhu utshalomali lwempilo yonke uma uhlela ukushada. Ngakho-ke ungahle usebenzise lesi sikhathi ukuthola uhlobo lwakho oluhle kakhulu.
Imivuzo emikhulu izofika kuwe uma wenza njalo!
Isimiso sokuphola # 6: Ukubonga yisoso eliyimfihlo
Abanye abantu bakhokha izindebe ngokubonga, kepha kimi, kufana neswishi ethi 'on'.
Uma ubusiswe ngokuhlangenwe nakho (noma ngabe akuyona leyo nto obuyifuna), ngenkathi uzama ukufeza okuthile empilweni, kukusiza ukudweba indlela yakho eya empumelelweni.
Kuzobe kugqamisa indlela yakho futhi kukufundise izifundo okudingeka uzifunde ukufinyelela izinhloso zakho.
Bonga ngawo wonke amathuba, ukuqonda, nokuzwa okuhle noma okubi. Noma uphuthelwe yinto esemqoka ezinhlosweni zakho noma kulokho okulindele, noma ngabe kudingeke ukuthi ufunde isifundo esinzima bonga.
Kepha khumbula akudingeki ukuthi unamathele kulokho okutholile uma ungakuthandi, funda nje futhi ukhule kukho ngokubonga.
Uma unenkinga yokuhlangenwe nakho ungahlali kuyo ngenxa yokubonga - phuma ubonge unkulunkulu ngokukubonisa okungafanele ukwenze bese uqala ukucela ukuholwa ekulungiseni noma yini eyayikuwe edonse leso simo.
Isimiso sokuthandana # 7: Hamba ebusweni bokwesaba
Ukuqomisana kungasabisa, ukuzibeka lapho futhi ukukhombisa ukuba sengozini kwakho kumuntu ongamazi kungaba yinselele, kepha kunesisho esithi ukwesaba nguthisha wakho omkhulu kunabo bonke.
Ukwesaba kukukhombisa ukuthi yimuphi umnyango okufanele ngabe uhamba ngawo futhi kukuvulele umhlaba omusha, uma nje ubungangena nje.
Ngakho-ke ungavumeli ukwesaba kukuvimbe ekubambeni lowo ozoshada naye ozayo.
Phuma lapho uhambe ngeminyango ekwesabisayo!