-Delile
- Kungenzeka yini ukuthanda abantu ababili ngasikhathi sinye?
- Kuthiwani uma sobathathu sivumelana?
- Ezothando nezocansi
Esinye sezimo ezibucayi kakhulu lapho owesifazane ethanda amadoda amabili futhi engakwazi ukunquma ukuthi ufuna ukuhlala ezinikele kubani. Uthando luchaza nocansi, futhi lokhu kungaba yinkinga uma usebudlelwaneni besikhathi eside noma uneminyaka ushadile futhi unezingane.
Lapho uhlanganyela nothile esimeni sothando, ucansi luzovela ngokuzenzakalela esithombeni, futhi kufanele sisho ukuthi uma usuvele unaye umuntu ohlangothini lwakho ukufeza leso sidingo esiyisisekelo, ukufuna ubumnandi nobumnandi kwenye indawo kubizwa ngokuthi “ukukopela. ”
Kungenzeka yini ukuthanda abantu ababili ngasikhathi sinye?
Incazelo yakho yothando iguqula umbono wakho, ukuthi uzibona kanjani ukuthi unamadoda amabili ngasikhathi sinye. Kufanele uzibuze ukuthi uthando lisho ukuthini kuwe.
Ukuba umuzwa onzima kangako, uthando lungahlanganiswa nokuthinta okufudumele komlingani wakho wokuphila konke, izandla zakhe zizungeze wena futhi zikuthinte ngamehlo akhe othando. Noma ungabona uthando njengomzamo wokuzidela njalo, ufuna njalo ukwanelisa umlingani wakho futhi ubenze bajabule.
Ungathola ukuphepha nenduduzo kuzo zombili lezi zimo ezingenhla, ngenkathi ngasikhathi sinye uhlangabezana nenjabulo nokuthokoza kothando ezandleni zomuntu okhethekile, ophakeme kakhulu ngokuphila futhi unovalo ezintweni ezijabulisayo zesono.
Uma ubandakanyeka ebudlelwaneni bomshado iminyaka, futhi ucabanga ukuthi umlingani wakho akasazenelisi izidingo zakho zocansi, ukuzibandakanya nomunye umuntu nokumkhohlisa kuyindaba ephikisanayo.
U-Andrew G. Marshall, umeluleki wezomshado waseBrithani, ubhala ukuthi ukuze uthando lube khona kumuntu, udinga izinto ezintathu ezibalulekile: ukusondelana, uthando nokuzimisela.
Ukubeka lokhu engqondweni, ukuze umuntu athande omunye, ukuzibophezela kudinga ukubandakanyeka, ngakho-ke ukuthanda amadoda amabili ngasikhathi sinye kungasho inkinga.
Kuthiwani uma sobathathu sivumelana?
Omunye wabangane bami, ake simbize ngokuthi uPaula, wazibandakanya nenye insizwa okuthiwa uTom esanda kweva eminyakeni engu-40. Umyeni wakhe wayekwazi lokho ngoba wamtshela konke ngakho, bavumelana ngokuthi bobathathu bazohlala ndawonye endlini eyodwa. Lokhu kwaphela cishe iminyaka emibili, futhi uTom wagcina esehambile wahlukana nesithandwa sakhe.
Uma lokhu kuxazululwe kusengaphambilini futhi kwadalulwa ngokuphelele phakathi kwamalungu amabili alo mbhangqwana, lolu hlobo uma amalungiselelo engasebenza, kepha noma kunjalo, ezimweni eziningi awasebenzi njengezivumelwano zesikhathi eside.
Umphakathi wethu usekelwe ekuhlelweni komuntu oyedwa, futhi abantu bangase bangakhululeki futhi bangayiqondi kahle imizwa yakho komunye njengomuntu nje othanda izinto ezingokwemvelo.
Vele, ungazizwa unemizwa ejulile ngawo womabili la madoda empilweni yakho, kepha abantu bahlala behleba futhi bachithe ukungezwani kwabo ngendlela engafanele esimweni esibandakanya ukuthanda abantu ababili ngasikhathi sinye.
Ezothando nezocansi
Ukuthanda abantu ababili ngasikhathi sinye kungadala ukudideka okukhulu kwemizwa nokudideka.
Njengoba sishilo phambilini, uma bobathathu bevumelana ngobudlelwano nemizwelo ethintekayo, izinto zingabonakala zisebenza. Imibhangqwana eminingi iyabandakanyeka ebudlelwaneni obungaphandle komshado, futhi ivumela abalingani bayo ukuba bahlanganyele kumbuthano wesithembu.
Imvamisa bavame ukukugcina lokhu kuyimfihlo yabo, ngoba lolu hlobo lokuziphatha ngokuvamile aluhambisani nezindinganiso zomphakathi.
Uma uthanda othile, uthando akuwona ukuphela komuzwa wokuthi uhlangabezana nobubanzi bomzwelo wakho. Kanye nothando futhi kuza nokuqhathanisa, okufana nomona, usizi noma ukwesaba ukulahlwa.
Ubulili buhlobene kakhulu nabantu, futhi ngezinye izikhathi bungaba namandla kangangokuba bungaguqula isizinda sakho sangaphambili somzwelo obukade unaso nendoda yakho yokuqala.
Kepha uma uphuma futhi uzizwa ukhangwa enye indoda ngoba nje ufuna ukubona imicabango yakho futhi ubalekela impilo eyisicefe yansuku zonke, usuke uzicabangela wena, futhi udinga ukuthembeka kuwe.
Kubizwa ngokuthi ukukopela, njengoba sishilo phambilini, kepha uma ubonile ukuthi umlingani wakho wamanje akuyena obekade enzelwe wena, khuluma nabo, kepha ungabi ngumqaphi.