Kungaba nzima ukudlula yonke i-BDSM namagama okuqalekisa uma kukhulunywa Amashumi amahlanu amathunzi eGrey. Uma usuqedile ukukhala “oh my!” noma ubhoka ngokuthi le ncwadi nefilimu zimbi kangakanani esintwini, empeleni zikhona izifundo ezimbalwa ezinhle ongazifunda ezingasiza umshado wakho.
Ngaphambi kokufika kulezi zifundo, kufanelekile ukuthi ugcizelele ukuthi lokhu akukona ukudala umgodi we-kinky ekhabethe lakho noma enye into enjalo. Imayelana nokuvula amehlo akho kwezinye izifundo kusuka Amashumi amahlanu amathunzi eGrey lokho kuzokwenza umshado wakho uzinze ngaphakathi nangaphandle kwekamelo lokulala.
1. Gxila Komunye Nomunye
Ngenkathi imikhuba kaChristian kungenzeka ukuthi ngezinye izikhathi yawela ohlangothini lwe-stalker ye-spectrum, kukhona okumele kushiwo ngokugxila kumlingani wakho. Awudingi ukuqonda ukubukwa okukhulu, kepha uma nindawonye, konke ukugxila kwenu kumele kube komunye nomunye nokuxhuma ngaleso sikhathi. Ungabuki ifoni yakho, ukhohlwe iziphazamiso ezikuzungezile, futhi wenze umzamo wokubheka emehlweni womunye futhi uxhumane ngempela. Kwakha ukusondelana okungazuzisa umshado wakho
2.Ungahluleli
Ukwakha ubudlelwano obungenazinqumo kubalulekile kuzo zonke izici zomshado. Ngokusobala uChristian no-Ana babenezintandokazi nemibono eyehluke kakhulu lapho behlangana, kepha akekho kubo owahlulela omunye. Akekho kini okufanele azizwe enqikaza ukukhuluma ngemizwa yakhe ngokwesaba ukwahlulelwa. Yamukela futhi uthandane ngalokho oyikho.
3.Gcina Umqondo Ovulekile Ekamelweni Lokulala
Lokhu kulungile phezulu lapho ningahlulelani. Uma kukhulunywa ngokusondelana, ufuna ukugcina izinto zivulekile ngangokunokwenzeka ukuze nobabili nizizwe nikhululekile ukwabelana ngezidingo nezidingo zenu. Imicabango yakho ingahle ingabambeki ngokuphelele, kepha lokho akufanele kukuvimbe ekuvulekeni ekufundeni ngalokho abakufunayo futhi ucabangele ukuyekethisa. Ukukhulumisana ngokukhululekile uma kukhulunywa ngokusondelana kuyisihluthulelo somshado owanelisayo. Ngaphandle kwalokho, ukuzama izinto ezintsha kungaba mnandi kakhulu kini nobabili!
4.Kwazi Ukubaluleka Kothando Nothando
Impela, i-trilogy yayikhokhiswa ngokocansi, kepha kwakungeyona eyocansi kuphela phakathi kukaChristian no-Ana, kwakukhona nothando lweqiniso futhi. Abesilisa nabesifazane banecala lokuvumela ukuthinta kothando nothando kushelele ngemuva komshado. Wonke umuntu ufuna ukuzizwa ethandwa futhi ethandwa. Ukuzinika isikhathi sokubambana nokuphathaphathana, ukuncomana, nokuthandana kwenza lokho nje. Ungamane uqabule futhi ugonane lapho sekuyisikhathi sokuya ocansini futhi esikhundleni salokho wenze imizamo yokukhombisa uthando nothando kaningi ngosuku, kungaba ngokwanga esiphongweni noma ngokwangana okududuzayo ngemuva kosuku olunzima.
5.Yenza Ukusondelana Kuze Kuqala
Ukusondelana akudingeki kube yikho konke, kepha akufanele kuthathe i-backburner njengoba kwenzeka kaningi emshadweni. Yenza ukusondelana kube yinto ephambili ebudlelwaneni bakho noma ngabe impilo iba matasa kangakanani. Ngabe udinga isikhuthazo ngaphandle kwempilo engcono engokomzwelo nengokwengqondo? Ukusondelana kuyitshe legumbi lemishado enempilo, ngakho-ke thola indlela yokukusebenzisela owakho, noma ngabe ukhathele kangakanani ekupheleni kosuku.