-Delile
- Funda ukuxhumana ngendlela ehlukile
- Funda ukuxolisa
- Khumbula izinto ezinhle ngomlingani wakho
- Thola okuthile okuthandayo bese ukwenze
Abantu abaningi abashadile bafika babone umeluleki ebuza: “Ngingawenza kanjani umshado wami ube ngcono?” Futhi abaningi, ngeshwa, bafika sekwedlule isikhathi, okuningi ngemuva kokuthi ubuhlobo sebuvele bonakaliswe ukufutheka okungapheli, izingxabano, nentukuthelo. Kungakho kufanele usebenze ekuvimbeleni izinto zingahambi kangako bese usebenzisa izinguquko ezimbalwa ezilula kodwa ezibalulekile ezizokwenza umshado wakho ube ngcono ngokushesha.
Funda ukuxhumana ngendlela ehlukile
Iningi labantu abashadile abangajabule babelana ngobuthakathaka obulodwa obubi - abazi ukuthi baxhumana kanjani kahle. Lokhu akusho ukuthi ungumxhumanisi o-lousy ngokujwayelekile. Ungaba yinto emnandi kakhulu nabangani bakho, izingane, umndeni, osebenza nabo. Kepha imvamisa kunokuthile okudala impikiswano efanayo phakathi kwamadoda nabafazi kaninginingi.
Yingakho kubalulekile ukuthi ufunde ukukhuluma ngokuhlukile nomlingani wakho. Okushoyo ukuthi udinga ukuthambisa ibinzana lakho lesingeniso (siyazi ukuthi kukhona elilodwa, njengokuthi “Awukaze ...”). Udinga ukugwema ukuzivikela noma ulaka. Vele ukhulume njengabantu abadala ababili. Ngaso sonke isikhathi gwema ukusola; zama ukunikeza ukuqonda ngombono wakho esikhundleni salokho, futhi okubaluleke kakhulu - zama ukuqonda nombono womlingani wakho.
Qala ngokunaka amaphethini ekukhulumisaneni kwakho. Ngubani ophakeme kakhulu? Yini ebangela ukumemeza? Yini eguqula ingxoxo ejwayelekile ibe yimpi yangenkathi ephakathi? Manje, yini ongayenza ngokuhlukile? Ungazikhipha kanjani wena kanye nowakwakho emgibeni bese niqala ukukhuluma njengabantu ababili abathandanayo?
Funda ukuxolisa
Amathuba athile akhela eselulekweni esedlule ukufunda ukuthi ungaxolisa kanjani. Ngeshwa, abaningi bethu abakwazi ukukhuluma ngokuxolisa okuqotho. Kwesinye isikhathi siyabambabamba, kepha kuyaqabukela sikucabangele ngokweqiniso ukuthi yini esixolisa ngayo. Yize ukuxolisa okuphoqelelwe kusengcono kunokungabikho, kufanele kube ngaphezu kwamazwi nje.
Isizathu esenza sikuthole kunzima ukuxolisa kungenxa ye-egos yethu. abanye bangaze bathi siyakuthokozela ukulimala nokulimaza abanye ngoba kukhona esikutholayo kukho. Kepha, noma singeyona imidondoshiya kangako, sonke singavuma ukuthi ukuthi “ngiyaxolisa” uma uzwa ukuthi amalungelo akho alimazekile kungaba yinto enzima kakhulu emhlabeni.
Kodwa, ezingxoxweni eziningi zomshado, bobabili abalingani kufanele baxolise, ngoba bobabili bathambekele ekulimaleni futhi bobabili bathambekele ekulimaleni omunye. Ningabalingani bokuphila, iqembu, hhayi izitha. Uma uxolisa ngozwela nangokuqonda ukuthi izenzo zakho zililimaze kanjani elinye iqembu, okuzokwenzeka ukuthi oshade naye cishe uzogxumela kuleso sikhathi ukuze alahle izingalo zakhe futhi abuyele kothando nokunakekelayo futhi.
Khumbula izinto ezinhle ngomlingani wakho
Izikhathi eziningi, lapho sihlala ebudlelwaneni isikhathi eside sikhohlwa ukuthi konke bekubukeka kanjani ekuqaleni. Noma sihlanekezela umbono wethu wokuqala ngophathina wethu bese sinqotshwa ukudumala: "Uhlale enjalo, angikaze ngikubone". Noma kungenzeka kube yiqiniso, okuphambene nakho kungahle kube okulungile - sabe sesibona okuhle nokuhle kumlingani wethu, sakukhohlwa endleleni. Sivumela intukuthelo ithathe indawo yayo.
Noma, kungenzeka ukuthi sisemshadweni osanda kulahlekelwa yinhlansi yawo. Asizizwa sinolaka noma singajabuli, kodwa futhi asisaluzwa uthando nentabatheko. Uma nifuna ukwenza umshado wenu usebenze futhi nilethe injabulo kini nobabili, qala ukukhumbula kabusha. Khumbula ukuthi kungani uthandane nomyeni noma unkosikazi wakho kwasekuqaleni. Yebo, ezinye izinto kungenzeka ukuthi zishintshile, noma ubukade unethemba ngaleso sikhathi, kepha ngakolunye uhlangothi, ngokuqinisekile kuzoba nezinto eziningi ezinhle osanda kuzikhohlwa.
Thola okuthile okuthandayo bese ukwenze
Enye yezinto eziphikisanayo ngobudlelwano ukuthi ngokwethu lapho sikwazi ukugcina okuningi, siyoba ngabalingani abangcono. Lokho akusho ukugcina izimfihlo noma ukungathembeki nokungabi neqiniso, nakancane! Kepha lokhu kusho ukuthi udinga ukuthola izindlela zokugcina ukuzimela kwakho nobuqiniso bakho.
Abaningi bethu bazama ukuba ngabalingani abangcono kakhulu abangaba yibo ngokushintsha ngokuphelele izindlela zabo nokunikela wonke amandla abo emshadweni. Yize lokhu kuncomeka ngezinga elithile, kunephuzu lapho uzolahlekelwa khona wena nomlingani wakho futhi nilahlekelwe. Ngakho-ke, thola izinto othanda ukuzenza, wenze lokho okuthandayo, sebenzela amaphupho akho bese wabelana ngokuhlangenwe nakho kwakho nomlingani wakho wempilo. Khumbula, oshade naye wakuthanda, ngakho-ke qhubeka ube ngokwakho!