-Delile
- Indlela bobabili abazali abangathola ngayo ngemuva
- Izinzuzo zomqondo wencwadi yezindaba
- Imiyalezo eyisi-6 esemqoka abazali okudingeka bayizwe
- 1. Leli akulona iphutha lakho.
- 2. Umama nobaba bayohlala bengabazali bakho.
- 3. Uzohlala uthandwa ngumama nobaba.
- 4. Lokhu kumayelana noshintsho, hhayi ukusolwa.
- 5. Ukhona futhi uzohlala uphephile.
- 6. Izinto zizolunga.
Izingane nesehlukaniso, lapho kuhlanganisiwe, kungaba yinkinga enkulu kubazali abahlukanisayo.
Wonke umzali ohlukanisayo ubhekene nenselelo enkulu: indlela yokukhuluma nezingane zakho ngesahlukaniso sakho! Ngenye yezingxoxo ezinzima kakhulu noma yimuphi umzali azoba nazo. Lokho kungenxa yokuthi kuthinta imizwa eminingi ejulile.
Ukulungiselela ukukhuluma nezingane ngesehlukaniso kungaba nzima kakhulu ngenxa yezithiyo ezivela kuzo zombili izingane zakho kanye noshade naye.
Ngenkathi izingane zakho zingagcwala ukwethuka, ukwesaba, ukukhathazeka, ukuzizwa unecala noma amahloni, ozoshada maduze nje angabonisa intukuthelo, usizi, intukuthelo nokusolwa.
Uma ingxoxo ingaphathwa kahle, ingaqinisa imizwa, iholele entukuthelweni enkulu, ukuzivikela, ukumelana, ukukhathazeka, ukwahlulela, nokudideka kuwo wonke umuntu othintekayo.
Lezi yizizathu zokuthi, kule minyaka eyishumi edlule, bengikhuthaza amaklayenti ami wokuqeqesha ukuthi asebenzise indlela engiyisungule eminyakeni engaphezu kwamashumi amabili edlule yokusiza ingane yakho ngesahlukaniso
Kufaka phakathi ukwakha incwadi yezindaba zomndeni wakho njengomthombo wokuvula indlela phakathi "kwenkulumo yesehlukaniso" esesabekayo. Kusiza kakhulu lapho ukhuluma nezingane ezineminyaka ephakathi kwemihlanu kuya kwengu-14.
Ngisebenzise umqondo wezincwadi ngaphambi kwesehlukaniso sami futhi ngathola ukuthi uneziningi izinzuzo kubo bobabili abazali nezingane zabo. Ngihlanganise izithombe zomndeni wethu ezihlanganisa iminyaka yomshado wami.
Ngiwafake kwi-albhamu yezithombe ehambisana nombhalo osekelayo engiwubhalile. Ngigxile ezikhathini ezimnandi, kokuhlangenwe nakho kwethu okuningi komndeni, kanye nezinguquko ezenzeke eminyakeni edlule.
Indlela bobabili abazali abangathola ngayo ngemuva
Umyalezo osemuva kwencwadi yezindaba uchaza ukuthi impilo iyinqubo eqhubekayo futhi eguqukayo:
- Kwakukhona impilo ngaphambi kokuba izingane zakho zizalwe nangemva kwalokho
- Siwumndeni futhi siyohlala sinjalo kodwa manje sisefomini ehlukile
- Ezinye izinto zizoshintsha emndenini wethu - izinto eziningi zizohlala zinjalo
- Ushintsho lujwayelekile futhi lungokwemvelo: amakilasi esikole, abangane, ezemidlalo, izinkathi zonyaka
- Impilo ingathusa njengamanje, kodwa izinto zizolunga
- Bobabili abazali bayabambisana ekwenzeni izinto zibe ngcono ezinganeni abazithandayo
Ngokukhumbuza izingane zakho ukuthi abazali bazo babenomlando ndawonye ngaphambi kokuzalwa kwabo, uzinika umbono ngempilo njengenqubo eqhubekayo enezinhla nezikhathi eziningi, ukusonta nokujika.
Vele, kuzoba nezinguquko ngaphambili ngenxa yokwehlukana noma isehlukaniso. Lezo zinguquko akudingeki ukuthi kuxoxwe ngazo kabanzi ngenkathi uxoxa okokuqala.
Le nkulumo imayelana nokuqonda nokwamukela. Kususelwa ekubeni bobabili abazali baxoxisane futhi bavumelane ngakho konke izinkinga zokuba ngumzali ngemuva kokuhlukanisa ngaphambi kwesehlukaniso.
Khumbula ukuthi izingane zakho azinacala ekwenzeni izinqumo zesehlukaniso. Akudingeki ukuthi babhekane nengcindezi yokwembulwa kwezinkinga zabantu abadala eziyinkimbinkimbi.
Musa ukubabeka ethubeni lokukhetha phakathi kwabazali, ukunquma ukuthi ngubani olungile noma ongalungile, noma ukuthi bafuna ukuhlala kuphi.
Isisindo salezo zinqumo, kanye necala nokukhathazeka okuhambisana nazo, kusinda kakhulu ukuba izingane zikuthwale.
Izinzuzo zomqondo wencwadi yezindaba
Ukusebenzisa incwadi yezindaba ebhalwe ngaphambilini ukwethula izingane zakho izindaba zesehlukaniso akusizi nje kuphela ukuthi uqonde ukukhuluma ngobumnene nezingane zakho ngesahlukaniso, kodwa Futhi kunezinzuzo eziningi zawo wonke umuntu emndenini.
Izinzuzo zomqondo wencwadi yezindaba zifaka:
- Uqala ngokuhlanganisa abazali bobabili ekhasini elilodwa ngezivumelwano ezibanzi ezinciphisa inqubo yezingxoxo zabazali nabachwepheshe
- Udale iskripthi, ngakho-ke awudingi ukungingiza engxoxweni
- Izingane zakho zingayifunda kaninginingi ezinsukwini nasezinyangeni ezizayo lapho kuphakama imibuzo, noma zidinga ukuqinisekiswa
- Akudingeki ube nazo zonke izimpendulo endaweni lapho ukhuluma nezingane
- Usebenzisa ulimi olubambisanayo, olususelwa enhliziyweni, olufaka wonke umuntu, ngakho-ke isehlukaniso esiseduze asizwakali njengesabekayo, siyethusa, noma siyesabisa
- Uba yisibonelo futhi ubeka inkundla yesehlukaniso esigxile ezinganeni lapho wonke umuntu ewina
- Bobabili abazali bakhuthazwe kakhulu ukugcina ukuxhumana okuhle, okunenhlonipho kanye nokubambisana
- Eminye imindeni iqhubeka nencwadi yezindaba ngemuva kwesahlukaniso ngezithombe ezintsha namazwana njengokuqhubeka kwempilo yomndeni wayo
- Ezinye izingane zithatha incwadi yezindaba zisuka emakhaya ziye ekhaya njengengubo yokuvikela
Imiyalezo eyisi-6 esemqoka abazali okudingeka bayizwe
Yimiphi imilayezo ebaluleke kakhulu ofuna ukuyidlulisa embhalweni wakho wencwadi yezindaba?
Lawa amaphuzu ayi-6 engikholelwa ukuthi abalulekile, axhaswa ukusekelwa kochwepheshe abayisithupha bezempilo yengqondo engixoxe nabo kusengaphambili.
1. Leli akulona iphutha lakho.
Izingane zivame ukusola zona lapho abazali becasukile. Izingane kufanele zazi ukuthi azinacala futhi akufanele zisolwe kunoma yiliphi izinga.
2. Umama nobaba bayohlala bengabazali bakho.
Izingane zidinga ukuqinisekiswa ukuthi, ngisho nangemva kwesahlukaniso, siwumndeni. Lokhu kubaluleke kakhulu uma omunye umlingani othandana naye esesithombeni!
3. Uzohlala uthandwa ngumama nobaba.
Izingane zingaba nokwesaba ukuthi omunye wabazali bazo noma bobabili bangabahlukanisa ngokuzayo. Badinga ukuqinisekiswa okuphindaphindiwe kwabazali maqondana nalokhu kukhathazeka.
Khumbuza izingane zakho njalo ukuthi bobabili umama nobaba bazithanda kangakanani futhi bazohlala bezithanda, naphezu kwesehlukaniso. Esikhathini esizayo. Badinga ukuqinisekiswa okuphindaphindiwe kwabazali maqondana nalokhu kukhathazeka.
4. Lokhu kumayelana noshintsho, hhayi ukusolwa.
Gxila kuzo zonke izinguquko ezenzeka empilweni: izinkathi zonyaka, izinsuku zokuzalwa, amamaki esikoleni, amaqembu ezemidlalo.
Chaza ukuthi lolu ushintsho esimweni somndeni wethu - kepha namanje siwumndeni nokho. Khombisa ubumbano olubumbene ngaphandle kokwahlulela. Lesi akusona isikhathi sokusola omunye umzali ngokudala isehlukaniso.!
5. Ukhona futhi uzohlala uphephile.
Isehlukaniso singawuphazamisa umuzwa wokuphepha nokuvikeleka kwengane. Badinga ukuqinisekiswa ukuthi impilo izoqhubeka, futhi usekhona ukuze ubasize bakwazi ukuzivumelanisa nezinguquko.
6. Izinto zizolunga.
Yazisa izingane zakho ukuthi bobabili abazali basebenzela imininingwane yabantu abadala ngakho konke kuzolunga emasontweni, ezinyangeni, naseminyakeni ezayo.
Bese usukuma uthathe izinqumo ezivuthiwe, ezibhekelekayo, ezinesihawu egameni labo ngokuzibeka ezicathulweni zabo futhi uhloniphe izidingo zabo ezingokomzwelo nezingokwengqondo.
Ungalokothi ukhulume kabi ngokuthi maduze uzoba ngumlingani wezingane zakho kungakhathalekile ukuthi zingakanani ubudala. Lo mkhuba wenza zonke izingane zizizwe sengathi kufanele zithathe uhlangothi, futhi izingane ziyakuzonda ukuthatha uhlangothi.
Kubenza bazizwe benecala uma bethanda omunye umzali. Ekugcineni, izingane ziyakwazisa futhi zizizwe ziphephile ngomzali ohlala ethembele komunye umzali.
Ngivame ukutshela amaklayenti ami okuqeqesha, "Uma ubungeke ube nomshado ojabulisayo, okungenani yiba nesehlukaniso esijabulisayo."
Lokhu kufezwa kangcono ngokwenza zonke izenzo zakho ngokuya ngeqiniso ‘okuhle kakhulu kubo bonke.’
Uma ungaqiniseki ukuthi lokho kungasho ukuthini emndenini wakho, finyelela ukwesekwa kochwepheshe. Awusoze wazisola ngalesi sinqumo esihlakaniphile.