-Delile
- 1. Yazi ukuthi ungalahlekelwa nguye
- 2. Dala okujwayelekile okusha
- 3. Funda ukubonisa uzwela
- 4. Funda ukwenza ingxoxo emnandi
- 5. Yiba yisithandwa esikhulu
- 6. Yazi ukubaluleka kwezinto ezincane
- 7. Khuphuka ezikhathini ezicindezelayo
- 8. Zikhule ndawonye
Ngaphandle kobuzali, umshado mhlawumbe ungenye yezinselelo ezinzima kunazo zonke owake wahlangabezana nazo, futhi lokho kusho lukhulu.
Mhlawumbe ukhuphuke intaba iKilimanjaro, wagijima umjaho webanga elide noma wahamba ngomkhumbi ngomhlaba, kepha uma kukhulunywa ngokugcina umkakho ejabule, ungazizwa sengathi ushaye udonga oluqinile lwezitini. Yazi ukuthi awuwedwa - abaningi babelane ngokukhungatheka kwakho nokuphelelwa yithemba kwakho.
Futhi, izindaba ezinhle ukuthi kukhona indlela noma izindlela eziningi zokuthuthukisa umshado, nokuhamba ngaleyo ndlela odongeni lwezitini, olungaphenduka lube yisimanga.
Lo mbhalo uhlose ukuhlinzeka ngemibono yobudlelwano obukhulu nokugqamisa ezinye zezingqinamba nezindawo zomshado lapho amadoda evame ukunganaki indlela owesifazane acabanga ngayo nokuthi yini emenza ajabule.
Kwesinye isikhathi ushintsho oluncane lungenza umehluko omkhulu, futhi likushiye uzibuza ukuthi kungani ulinde isikhathi eside kangaka noma ukuthi kungani ungakaze uqaphele lokhu phambilini, okwenza uzibuze ukuthi ungabenza kanjani ubuhlobo bakho buqine.
Okokuqala, kwenziwe kahle ngokufunda i-athikili ekhuluma ngokuqinisa imishado, ngoba kukhombisa ukuthi ufuna usizo, futhi labo abalufunayo bazoluthola.
Futhi okwesibili, uma kwenzeka uqala ukubona ukuthi lokhu akulungile - kuthiwani ngengxenye yowesifazane? - Yebo, uqinisile, abesifazane badinga ukuletha uhlangothi lwabo njengabesilisa, kepha okwamanje, siqonde ngqo ezintweni amadoda angazenza ukwenza ngcono imishado yabo.
Ngakho-ke, nazi izeluleko ezimbalwa ezibucayi zomshado onempilo. Lezi zeluleko zobudlelwano besilisa zingamathiphu omshado anempilo angasetshenziswa njengehange lokugcina ubuhlobo babo obucwilayo.
1. Yazi ukuthi ungalahlekelwa nguye
Lesi seluleko sobudlelwano besilisa sibucayi; yingakho kuqala.
Abanye besilisa baphila ngaphansi kwenkohliso yokuthi uma sebesayine amaphepha omshado, bekuyisivumelwano esenziwe, futhi bangahlala phansi, baphumule, futhi baphathe omkabo nganoma iyiphi indlela endala. Iphutha elikhulu!
Njenganoma yini enye ezuzisayo empilweni, umshado udinga umzamo ongaguquguquki, ukunakwa, ukubekezela nokuzimisela ukuthola imiphumela emihle kakhulu.
Kubalulekile ukuthi ukhumbule ukuthi udinga ukuhamba ibanga elingaphezulu kokwakha imishado esondelene nokwakha ubudlelwano obuqinile.
Ubungeke uphuphe ukubhalisela i-doctorate bese ungafaki umsebenzi ukuze kwenzeke. Noma ubungeke uthathe inkathazo yokutshala ingadi yemifino bese ungazihluphi ngokuyinakekela - ukuchelela, ukususa ukhula nokufaka umquba.
2. Dala okujwayelekile okusha
Enye inkohliso elula futhi ebulalayo ukuwela ngaphansi kwayo ukuthi 'indlela yami iyindlela ejwayelekile / efanele.' Futhi-ke, kungenzeka ukuthi umkakho ucabanga ukuthi indlela yakhe ilungile futhi ijwayelekile.
Okuvame ukwenzeka ukuthi omunye wenu ahlehlise omunye, bese lokho akuthandayo, isiko, noma indlela akhule ngayo kube yinto ejwayelekile emshadweni wabo. Lokhu kuyingozi impela futhi kungaholela ebudlelwaneni obuncikile.
Kodwa-ke, uma nikwazi lokhu, ningafuna ngenkuthalo ukudala okujwayelekile kini nobabili, lapho nixoxa khona futhi nixoxe ngezinto ngokucophelela, ukwenza ngcono umshado wenu.
Ngale ndlela, ungathola indawo yokuwina-win maphakathi, kunokuba uthathe okungalungile / okulungile, indlela yami noma indlela yomgwaqo omkhulu.
3. Funda ukubonisa uzwela
Ukuzwela kusho ukukwazi ukubona nokwabelana ngemizwa yomunye umuntu. Kuyingxenye ebalulekile kunoma yibuphi ubudlelwano obunempilo futhi kungasiza ukugcina umshado uqinile.
Ingxenye enkulu yokubonisa uzwela ukulalela nokuqinisekisa noma yini umkakho abhekene nayo.
Uma eke waba nosuku olukhathazayo noludingayo, into engcono ongayisho ukuthi, “Ngitshele konke ngakho.” Bese uhlala phansi, umbambe ngesandla, umbheke emehlweni ngenkathi ekhuluma, bese ulalelisisa.
Lapho ezwakalisa ubuhlungu obuthile noma ekutshela ukuthi lokhu noma lokho bekucasula kakhulu, ungasho okuthile okufana nokuthi, “Lokho bekumele kube nzima” noma “Ngiyaxolisa ukuthi ube nosuku olunzima kangaka.”
Uma ufisa ukuthuthukisa ubudlelwano bakho, khumbula ukuthi lesi akusona isikhathi sokumtshela ukuthi kungani bekungafanele azizwe ngaleyo ndlela noma asikisele ukuthi ubengasisingatha kanjani isimo ngendlela ehlukile.
4. Funda ukwenza ingxoxo emnandi
Ngakho-ke ngemuva kokuthi kufanele umlalele kahle, manje ngokungangabazeki uzofuna ukukulalela. Mhlawumbe awuzizwa uthanda ukukhuluma ngesikhathi ufika ekhaya ngemuva kosuku olunzima emsebenzini, kodwa lokhu kubalulekile kumkakho.
Uma ungafuni ukumtshela ngosuku lwakho, uzizwa ekhishwe inyumbazane futhi avalelwe ngaphandle. Ubuqili “bohlobo oluqinile, buthule” kungenye inkohliso edale umonakalo emishadweni eminingi.
Ngakho-ke, uma uzibuza ukuthi 'ungabuqinisa kanjani ubudlelwano' noma 'ukuthi ungabuthuthukisa kanjani umshado', vele uthathe isikhathi esithile uphumule futhi ukhululeke.
Mhlawumbe udinga isikhathi sokuphumula ejimini noma ubeke izinyawo zakho phezulu isikhashana. Thola ukuthi yini okusebenza kahle kakhulu bese uvulelekile ukwenza izingxoxo ezimnandi nomkakho.
5. Yiba yisithandwa esikhulu
Ngokuqinisekile awuzange ushade ukuze nihlale ndawonye!
Ngakho-ke sebenzela ukuba nokuphila kobulili okungcono kakhulu ngoba kuzothuthukisa umshado wakho futhi kuqinise ubudlelwane bomshado kuwo wonke amazinga.
Uma sengikushilo lokho, kancane isimo senkukhu neqanda - eza kuqala?
Kwabesifazane abaningi, izikhathi ezimnandi embhedeni ziza ngemuva kokuxhumana okuningi okuhle usuku lonke - uthando nokusondelana, okumenza azizwe efunwa futhi edingeka ngaso sonke isikhathi, hhayi lapho kuphela amalambu ecishiwe. Thola ukuthi ngabe kunjalo yini ngomlingani wakho, funda ukuthi yini eyenza umkakho ajabule, futhi uqonde izidingo zakhe zokuqinisa umshado wakho.
6. Yazi ukubaluleka kwezinto ezincane
Enye yezindlela ezinhle kakhulu zokwenza ngcono umshado wenu ukuqonda ukubaluleka kwezinto ezincane enizenzelana.
Kulula ukuvumela izinto ezincane zishelele - njengokuthi ngiyacela ngiyabonga, noma ukumvulela umnyango, noma ukumthumela umyalezo omncane wokuthi 'unjani' emini.
Mhlawumbe ucabanga ukuthi ngeke kwenze mehluko omkhulu, futhi umatasa kakhulu ngezinto 'ezibaluleke kakhulu' kunokukhanyisela ukuthi 'ungabuthuthukisa kanjani ubudlelwano bakho nokuthi ungenza kanjani umshado ube ngcono' noma 'ungaba kanjani nomshado onempilo'.
Kepha, ngokuhamba kwesikhathi, ungamangala ukubona ukuthi zonke lezi zinto ezincane zengeza kanjani ekuqiniseni ubudlelwano bomshado, njengembali ngayinye encane noma isitshalo esivandeni sakho, futhi lapho ulahlekelwa kakhulu, ingadi yakho iyoheha kakhulu.
7. Khuphuka ezikhathini ezicindezelayo
Umkakho kungenzeka angaluceli njalo usizo, kepha uma uqaphile, uyabona ukuthi udonsa nini.
Mhlawumbe ukububula lapha nalaphaya noma ukuthula okungajwayelekile okuzokutshela ukuthi ukhathele noma unengcindezi. Ngemuva kwalokho ungakhuphuka usize ngomsebenzi wasendlini, noma umenzele ibhafu yokugeza enhle, umenzele inkomishi yetiye noma yekhofi.
Lolu hlobo lokunakekelwa ngothando nakanjani luzokuzuzisa izinzuzo ezingaziwa.
Umkakho uyozizwa ukuthi uyamsekela nokuthi akudingeki athwale umthwalo osindayo womsebenzi wasekhaya eyedwa. Ukusiza ngezindlela ezingokoqobo nezicabangayo kungenye yezindlela ezingcono kakhulu zokwenza ngcono umshado wakho.
8. Zikhule ndawonye
Ekugcineni, khumbula ukuthi ushintsho alunakugwemeka.
Njengoba nobabili niqala ukuguga nokukhula, kanjalo nothando lwenu nomshado wenu. Awusuye lo muntu owawunguye eminyakeni emibili edlule, futhi nonkosikazi wakho akayona leyo nto.
Enye yezindlela ezinhle kakhulu zokwenza ubudlelwano ukuqinisekisa ukuthi uhlala ekhasini elifanayo.
Ngakho-ke, hambani ngokuhambisana ukuze nikwazi ukukhula ngomusa nenjabulo ndawonye.