-Delile
- Ukuba nobudlelwano obuvulekile
- Bungasebenza kanjani ubudlelwano obuvulekile?
- Ukuthandana nothile ebudlelwaneni obuvulekile
- Kungani ubudlelwane obuvulekile bungasebenzi kwabanye?
"Sinobudlelwano obuvulekile". Wake wazibuza ukuthi kusho ukuthini lokho?
Kalula nje, ubudlelwano obuvulekile ubuhlobo bomshado noma bokuphola lapho bobabili abalingani bevumelene ngokuba nabanye abalingani bobulili ngaphandle kokuzibophezela kwabo okuyinhloko komunye nomunye.
Lo mqondo ungene kwimfashini ngawo-1970, futhi buwubuhlobo obaziwayo obunamandla kuze kube namuhla.
Bisebenza kanjani ubudlelwano obuvulekile: imithetho.
Ubudlelwano obuvulekile bususelwa ekuvumeleni ukungabi nomfazi oyedwa.
Lokhu ngokwesiko kusebenza kubo bobabili abalingani ebudlelwaneni, kepha kunezibonelo zomunye wabalingani abakhetha ukuhlala bodwa, kepha bevuma, noma besekela, omunye umlingani ojabulela ubudlelwano bezocansi nabalingani abaningi abangaphandle kobudlelwano obukhulu.
Umthetho ojwayelekile ngukuthi yonke imisebenzi yezocansi kumele yenziwe ngokuphepha, ngokokuziphatha, nangemvume yabo bonke abathintekayo.
Isisekelo sihlala sithembekile futhi sisebenza obala.
Ubudlelwano obuvulekile budinga ukungabi nomona noma ubunikazi, noma ngeke busebenze ngendlela enempilo.
Ungaba kanjani ebudlelwaneni obuvulekile?
Ngubani okhetha ukuba nobudlelwano obuvulekile? Ngabe ubudlelwano obuvulekile bungasebenza?
Kufanele ukhululeke ngomqondo wokungakhethi ngoba ukuba ebudlelwaneni obuvulekile kubhekwe kulo mqondo.
Abantu abamukela lesi sitayela sobudlelwano bathi bavele “bazi” ukuthi abakwazi ukuba bodwa, nokuthi babekujabulela njalo ukuba nabalingani abalinganayo, nokuthi imodeli yobuhlobo ejwayelekile esuselwa ekwethembekeni komlingani oyedwa ayisebenzi kubo.
Bathi kubonakala kungokwemvelo futhi banenkinga yokubusa ekufuneni kwabo ukulala nabanye abantu.
Uma ukhuluma nabantu abasebudlelwaneni obuvulekile, bangakutshela ukuthi ukuba sebudlelwaneni obuvulekile kubanikeza okuhle kunakho konke imihlaba: inkululeko nokuzibophezela.
Banomlingani wabo oyinhloko, abathandayo futhi abachitha isikhathi sabo esiningi benaye, futhi banabalingani bobulili besibili.
Ukuba nobudlelwano obuvulekile
Kusho ukuthini ukuba nobudlelwano obuvulekile?
Bonke ubudlelwano obuvulekile bunemithetho yabo, kepha imvamisa abalingani besibili kumane kuyizocansi kuphela. Uma umuntu ethola ukuthi basondela kakhulu ngokomzwelo kumlingani ongeyona eyinhloko, imvamisa uyeka ukumbona lowo wesilisa noma lowo wesifazane. (Lokhu kwehlukile ebudlelwaneni obunesizotha, esivumela abalingani ukuthi bakhe ubuhlobo bezocansi nobomzwelo nabanye abantu abangaphandle kobudlelwano bokuqala.)
Bungasebenza kanjani ubudlelwano obuvulekile?
Ukuze lokhu kuphumelele, bobabili abalingani kudingeka babe semkhunjini.
Imvamisa bobabili abantu bazokujabulela abalingani bobulili bangaphandle, kodwa hhayi impela. Kunobudlelwano obuvulekile lapho omunye umlingani ahlala eyedwa ngenkathi omunye evunyelwe, ngokuvuma ngokugcwele, ukulala nabanye abantu. Lokhu kungabangelwa ukuthi umlingani oyedwa engasakwazi ukwenza ucansi, noma oselahlekelwe yintshisekelo kwezocansi, kepha usamthanda owakwakhe futhi ufisa ukuhlala emshadweni futhi abone umlingani wakhe ejabule.
Kepha iqiniso ngukuthi: ubudlelwano obuvulekile bungasebenza kuphela uma buhlanganisa ukwethembeka mayelana nokuthi ulala nobani, ukugcina isheke kumona, futhi ngaphezu kwakho konke ukukwenza kucace kumlingani wakho oyinhloko ukuthi "yibo".
Inhlonipho, ukuxhumana, nokugcina impilo yakho yokuqala yocansi ijabule nakho kubalulekile ekwenzeni ubudlelwano bakho obuvulekile busebenze.
Ukuthandana nothile ebudlelwaneni obuvulekile
Usanda kuhlangana nomuntu owesabekayo futhi ekutshela ukuthi usebudlelwaneni obuvulekile. Leli kungaba yithuba lokuthi ufunde ngemingcele yakho.
Uma umthanda ngempela futhi ufuna ukuqhubeka nokumbona, zibuze le mibuzo elandelayo:
Unomona kangakanani?
Uma ufuzo lwakho olunomona luqinile, ungahle ungajabuli ngokwazi ukuthi unomlingani oyinhloko nabanye abalingani besibili
Ngabe udinga ukuzibophezela ebudlelwaneni?
Uma umfana wakho esevele enobudlelwano obuyinhloko, ngeke uthole izinga lokuzibophezela ongakudinga kuye.
Uma, ngakolunye uhlangothi, unesifiso sokuzama uhlobo lwenkululeko ubudlelwano obuvulekile obungakunika lona, kungani ungaqhubeki uye phambili?
UKristina ubuchaza ngale ndlela ubudlelwano bakhe obukhululekile: “Ngangishade iminyaka engu-20 nendoda enesikhwele, enomona. Wayengowesiko — iMorocco — elalibheka abesifazane njengezimpahla. Angikwazanga ukuba nabangane besilisa; wayehlala engisola futhi engigcina ngithathe nempahla! ” Ekugcineni ngafaka isicelo sesehlukaniso futhi ngakha ngokushesha iphrofayili kuTinder.
Bengifuna ukuphola namadoda ahlukahlukene futhi ngenze isikhathi esilahlekile!
KuTinder ngahlangana noPhil, umFulentshi owayefuna ubudlelwano obungebona obabodwa. Umlando wakhe wakusho konke wathi: "Ufuna umuntu ozohlanganyela naye ocansini, njalo noma ngezikhathi ezithile." Njengami, wayesanda kushiya ubudlelwano besikhathi eside bomuntu oyedwa futhi wayefuna ukulala nabesifazane abaningi abahlukahlukene ngangokunokwenzeka.
Njengoba bengingafuni ukuzibophezela kabusha kumuntu oyedwa, uPhil wayengifanele ngokuphelele. Manje sisebudlelwaneni obuvulekile unyaka wonke, futhi singomunye wemibhangqwana ejabule kakhulu engiyaziyo. Singumlingani oyinhloko womunye nomunye, kepha lapho uPhil ethola umuzwa wokuthi "azame esinye isitho sangasese sowesifazane" njengoba esho, uyazi ukuthi angakwenza lokhu ngemvume yami ephelele. Futhi lapho ngifuna ukuba nezindlela ezahlukahlukene zocansi, ulungile nami lapho sixhuma abanye abafana. ”
Kungani ubudlelwane obuvulekile bungasebenzi kwabanye?
Kwesinye isikhathi ubudlelwano obuvulelekile abuvezi iphupho abalithembisa ngokugeleza okungaguquguquki kozakwethu abahlukile kwezocansi. Ezinye zezizathu eziyinhloko zokuthi ubudlelwano obuvulekile abusebenzi zifaka:
- Omunye wabalingani bebona ukuthi ufuna ukukhetha kuphela phela.
- Abalingani abaningi bezocansi kunciphisa ithuba lomuntu lokwakha izibopho ezijulile nabantu ababelana nabo ngemizimba yabo.
- Ukwesaba ama-STD noma empeleni ukubamba nokusabalalisa i-STD.
- Ukuzethemba kwakho kungalimala, ikakhulukazi uma umlingani wakho oyinhloko eqala ukuchitha isikhathi esincane kakhulu nomuntu obukeka kahle kakhulu kunawe.
- Njengoba ukhula, ngokwemvelo ngifuna ukuzibophezela kumuntu oyedwa kuphela. Isimo se-singles nje asisakwenzeli wena.
Ekupheleni kosuku, nguwe kuphela onganquma ukuthi ubudlelwano obuvulekile buzohlangabezana yini nezidingo zakho. Cabanga ukuthi yini le ngokucophelela ngaphambi kokuba ungene kulobu budlelwano obusha obunamandla.