Izimpawu Eziyisixwayiso ezingama-40 zobudlelwano obunobuthi

Umlobi: Louise Ward
Usuku Lokudalwa: 5 Ufebhuwari 2021
Ukuvuselela Usuku: 1 Ujulayi 2024
Anonim
Izimpawu Eziyisixwayiso ezingama-40 zobudlelwano obunobuthi - Incwadi Ehlukene Yengqondo
Izimpawu Eziyisixwayiso ezingama-40 zobudlelwano obunobuthi - Incwadi Ehlukene Yengqondo

-Delile

Buyini ubudlelwano obunobuthi?

Ngaphambi kokuxoxa ngezimpawu zobudlelwano obunobuthi, ake siqale siqonde ukuthi buyini ubudlelwano obunobuthi.

Ubudlelwano obunobuthi ubuhlobo obubandakanya ukuziphatha kozakwethu onobuthi okulimaza ngokomzwelo nangokomzimba noma okulimaza umlingani wabo.

Lokhu akusho ukuthi abantu abanobuthi ebudlelwaneni obunobuthi bayingozi ngqo emzimbeni futhi basongela impilo nasempilweni yomunye umlingani.

Kepha kungahle kube yilokho omunye umlingani uzizwa esaba, esatshiswa, futhi esaba ukuveza imibono yabo ngoba banovalo futhi besaba ukuphatheka kabi komuntu ngokomzwelo.

Izimpawu ezingama-40 zobudlelwano obunobuthi

Nazi ezinye izimpawu zokuxwayisa ukuthi usebudlelwaneni obunobuthi.


1. Amandla amabi

Ebudlelwaneni obunobuthi, Ushuba, uthukuthele futhi uthukuthele uzungeze umlingani wakho, okwakha amandla amabi emzimbeni wakho, okungaholela ekuzondaneni kamuva.

Ukunganaki kungakuqeda kuzo zonke izici zempilo yakho. Ukunganaki kukukhipha ngokwengqondo, ngokomzimba nangokomzwelo. Siyaphoqeleka ukuthi sibhekane nalokhu kunganaki, kepha ubudlelwano bakho kufanele bube ngcono kulolo hlobo lwengcindezi.

2. Ubonakala ungenzi lutho kahle

Usebudlelwaneni obunobuthi uma ungabonakali wenza noma yini ngokulungile, noma ngabe uzama kanzima kangakanani ukukwenza kahle.

Okwamanje ufika kulelo phuzu lapho uzizwa sengathi konke okwenzayo kuyabacasula noma kuyabacasula, uzizwa ungakhululekile ukwenza izinto ezungeze umlingani wakho, futhi ubheke phezulu ebudlelwaneni bakho, kufanele uqonde ukuthi akuyona inkinga.

Izikhathi eziningi, kunokuthile umlingani wakho angajabuli ngakho, futhi abangakusho kuwe. Kuze kube bathembekile ukuthi kungani bekhungathekile futhi bengajabule, akukho okwenzayo okuzobonakala kulungile.


Ngabe ubudlelwano obunobuthi bungalungiswa? Asikho isiqinisekiso; kodwa-ke, amathuba akhula kakhulu lapho umuntu ezimisele ukushintsha.

3. Awuseneme nje

Sonke siyazi ukuthi akunakwenzeka ukuthi ujabule kuwo wonke umzuzu wobudlelwano bakho, kepha kukonke, umlingani wakho kufanele akwenze ujabule ngokwengeziwe.

Kufanele zikwenze uzizwe usekelwa, ubandakanyekile, ujabulile, futhi uyakwazi ukwenza noma yini ofuna ukuyenza. Kufanele bakusize wakhe kabusha futhi bakunike ithemba lokuthi izinto zingaba ngendlela ocabanga ukuthi kufanele zibe ngayo, okwenza ujabule.

Uma ungazizwa ujabulile uma uhlangana nomlingani wakho, kuyisibonakaliso sesixwayiso sokuthi usebudlelwaneni obunobuthi.

4. Konke kuyamangaza njalo

“Imibhangqwana eminingi iyachuma emidlalweni yaseshashalazini ephezulu—Ukuklabalasa, ukumangalelwa, izandla namazwi, ”kusho udokotela wezifo zengqondo uScott Haltzman, MD, umbhali wencwadi ethi The Secrets of Surviving Infidelity.


Ngaso sonke isikhathi, kunempikiswano eshubile, idrama, nokushintshana kwamagama ashisayo, okwenza kungabi mnandi impela ukuthi nizwane njalo.

Kungenzeka kungabi ukuhlaselwa ngokomzimba; kungahle kube ngokuziphatha kwabo. Lokhu kubhekwa njengesinye sezimpawu zobudlelwano obunobuthi.

Buka le vidiyo enokuqonda ngokugwema idrama yobudlelwano engadingekile:

5. Konke ukungavumelani kuyithuba lokuthola amaphuzu

I- ikhadi lesikolo lobudlelwano likhula ngokuhamba kwesikhathi ngoba umlingani oyedwa noma bobabili abalingani basebenzisa amaphutha adlule ukuthethelela ukulunga kwamanje.

Awugudluki kuphela odabeni lwamanje, kepha uletha icala nokuba nomunyu kusuka esikhathini esedlule ukuze usebenzise umlingani wakho ukuze azizwe engalungile kunoma iyiphi impikiswano yamanje noma ukungavumelani. Lokhu kuthathwa njengenye yezimpawu zobudlelwano ezingenampilo.

6. Awukhulumi ngokuqhubekela phambili ebudlelwaneni

Ozakwethu kudingeka bakhulume futhi ba-ayine izinto eziningi ezibalulekile ebudlelwaneni-hhayi nje ukuthi bayitholile yini i-sushi noma i-pizza yokuyikhipha noma okokugqoka.

Ake sithi umlingani wakho wenqaba ukukhuluma ngezihloko ezibalulekile zobudlelwano, njengokuthi uzoba nini nengane noma uthenge ikhaya noma uzoshada nini. Uma kunjalo, usebudlelwaneni obunobuthi.

Uma okuwukuphela kwento umlingani wakho akhuluma ngayo izikhuthazo ezingeke zikhuthaze ukukhula kobudlelwano, khona-ke umlingani wakho ukukufaka ngamatshe, okukhombisa ukuthi unobudlelwano obunobuthi.

7. Awukhulumisani kahle

Uzakwethu onobuthi uzofuna ukuthi ufunde ngokuzenzakalela ingqondo yabo ukuthola ukuthi bafuna ini.

Uzakwethu onobuthi uzolindela ukuthi ubikezele lapho bedinga ukwanga noma ingxoxo; lapho bafuna okubomvu hhayi okumhlophe; lapho bafuna yebo, hhayi cha.

Lesi ngesinye sezimpawu zobudlelwano obungenampilo obudala ukucindezeleka okukhulu ngenxa ye- isidingo esiqhubekayo sokulindela nokwenza ukuqagela okulungile.

8. Uqala ukulahlekelwa abangane

Ubudlelwano obunobuthi buyakungcolisa.

Ngenkathi usazama ukuthola nokulungisa okungalungile ngobudlelwano bakho obunobuthi, abangane bakho bamatasa bazibuza ukuthi yini engalungile ngawe.

Uma ubudlelwano bakho bukuguqula, kufanele bikwenzele inguqulo engcono yokuthi ungubani.

Uma uzizwa sengathi uzilahlekisela wena nabangane bakho noma awusazazi ukuthi ungubani, kuwuphawu oluxwayisayo lobudlelwano obunobuthi.

Uma ubheka lezi zimpawu ezingenhla ebudlelwaneni bakho, khona-ke ubudlelwano bakho bunobuthi, futhi bungaba yingozi kuwe emoyeni, ngokomzimba nangokwengqondo.

9. Akukho ukuphindisela noma ukulinganisela ebudlelwaneni

Ukuze ukubuyisana kusebenze, bobabili abalingani kudingeka babambisane futhi baqonde futhi bamukele ukuncika ebudlelwaneni.

Ukuphindaphinda ngeke kusebenze ebuhlotsheni lapho omunye umlingani akholelwa ukuthi baphakeme noma bayalawula.

Uzakwethu oncintisana kakhulu uzoba nenkinga yokuqonda futhi adale ukubuyisana. Funa ezinye izimpawu zomshado onobuthi futhi.

10. Ukugxekwa njalo

UJohn Gottman ukhombe ukugxekwa njengenye yezimpawu zobudlelwano ezinobuthi kanye nesibikezelo esiphambili sesehlukaniso noma sokuhlukana. Lokhu, akusho, ukuthi akusho ukuthi kufanele wamukele zonke izici nemikhuba yomlingani wakho, okubona kukubi.

Kugxilwe ekutheni lezo zikhalazo zizwakala kanjani.

Uma umlingani wakho ehlala ekugxeka esikhundleni sokucabanga ukuthi uzobambisana kanjani, khuluma nabo, bese uphakamisa enye indlela.

Bacele banake ukuthi bakhuluma kanjani nawe.

Esikhundleni sokuthi: “Uhlala ushiya ukungcola, engikudinga ukukuhlanza ngemuva kwalokho. Uwubudlabha, uvilapha futhi awunandaba. ”, Buza ukuthi bangangena yini esikhundleni sika“Kungasho lukhulu kimi uma ungahlanza ngemuva kokuqeda. Ngingakwenza lokhu / ngenza lokhu kusuka ekugcineni kwami. ”

Lapho ubona lesi sibonakaliso, cabanga ukuzibuza ukuthi uzophuma nini futhi kanjani ebudlelwaneni obunobuthi ngaphambi kokuba ukuzethemba kwakho kubhujiswe ngenxa yemibono eminingi emibi.

11. Isimo esinobutha

Ubutha, ngandlela thile, bujwayeleke kwabaningi bethu.

Kungavela kwenye indawo, hhayi ubambiswano kuphela. Ukucindezeleka, izinkinga emsebenzini, izinkinga ngengane, ukukhathazeka kwezezimali nezempilo kungaba yizinto zangaphandle ezithinta abalingani ukukhombisa ukuthukuthela komunye nomunye.

Uma isikhula, kungaba yinselele ukubuyisana, ukuxazulula impikiswano, nokuqhubeka.

Kubudlelwano obunobuthi, abalingani abayilungisi le nkinga noma bamane bayifihle ngesivumelwano sendawo. Lokhu kubangela intukuthelo eyengeziwe nokwanda kobutha.

Ubutha buhlala lapho, bulindele ukuqhuma, kubangele isimo sempi ebandayo nomshado onobuthi.

12. Ukungabi nokwethenjelwa

Ukuthembeka kungumgogodla wokuqina kobuhlobo.

Ukufika sekwephuzile kuma-aphoyintimenti, ukungaphenduli izingcingo nemibhalo kungenye yezindlela zokuziphatha ezicasulayo. Ezinye izindlela zokuziphatha zingaholela ekuzweleni kokungakwazi ukuthembela kumlingani wakho nakancane.

Umlingani ongathembekile uzokumemeza, enqabe ukukhuluma, bese ephuma egumbini, akushiye ubhekene nomuzwa wokulahlwa.

Ukungathembeki kungaziveza ngendlela yokungalindeli nakho. Ukungazi ukuthi umlingani wakho uzosabela kanjani ezimweni ezahlukene kuzokwenza ufune ukuphuma nokuzivikela.

Bheka izici zobuntu ezinobuthi ezingakwenza uzizwe uwedwa nomlingani wakho kunokungashadi.

13. Ukugwema mutual nokucasula

Imvamisa, ukuntuleka kokuxhumana okusebenzayo kuholela ekucasukeni nasekugwemeni. Lapho ungazi ukuthi ungabeka kanjani izinto ngamagama, kulula kakhulu ukungazinaki izihloko noma umlingani.

Ukuntuleka kokuxhumana okusebenzayo kungakwenza ucabange ukuthi umlingani wakho akafuni ukuqonda ukuthi ubhekene nani.

Ngaphezu kwalokho, lokhu kungaholela ekucasukeni okwakha kancane kancane intukuthelo. Ngakho-ke, ungabulungisa kanjani ubudlelwano obunobuthi?

Isinyathelo esisodwa ngesikhathi! Qala ngokuxhumana okuhlala kungenye yezinto ezibaluleke kakhulu ezifaka ukwaneliseka emshadweni.

14. Ukungabi nokuxhasana

Ngokusobala, enye yezinzuzo ezibaluleke kakhulu zokuba sebudlelwaneni ukujabulela ukwesekwa ngumlingani wakho.

Lolo hlobo lokusekelwa alutholakali kwenye indawo, njengoba abangane, umndeni, kanye nozakwethu bengeke basondelane nawe njengoba umlingani wakho engenza. Umlingani wakho uzokuthokozisa lapho uphansi, alalele izinkinga zakho, futhi akunikeze ngokomzimba nangokomzwelo.

Le yingxenye ebaluleke kakhulu yanoma ibuphi ubudlelwano obunempilo. Ulahlekelwa kakhulu uma umlingani wakho engasenazwelo futhi ungazizwa ungathululela isifuba sakho noma ucele usizo.

Uma lokhu kuhambe isikhathi eside ngokwanele futhi kungekho shintsho olwenzekile, lesi simo singakwenza ucabange ukuthi awukufanele ukuxhaswa nokunakekelwa okunjalo.

15. Ukuzizwa uphansi

Abantu abanokuthambekela kwe-narcissistic bakholelwa ukuthi baphakeme kunabanye futhi bavame ukulahla ngokuphelele imizwa yabanye abantu.

Uma uku-narcissist, kungahle kube nomuzwa wokuthi ubudlelwane buseceleni olulodwa kakhulu.

Ngemuva kokuvezwa kokuzethemba nokuphakama, abakwa-narcissists banokuzethemba futhi babagxeke kubangela ukusabela okungekuhle nokuguquguqukayo.

Uma uhlala uzithola unqena ukwabelana nanoma yimiphi impendulo engemihle, ungahle ube ebudlelwaneni obungenampilo.

16. Ukuzizwa ungafaneleki

Uma umlingani wakho ekwenza uzizwe sengathi udinga ukuthula nokuvumelana ngenkathi ubeka izidingo zabo phambili njalo - unobudlelwano obunobuthi.

Lapho izidingo nezifiso zethu zinganakwa isikhathi eside ngokwanele, siqala ukuzizwa ngathi asinalungelo lokufuna nhlobo.

Lapho uhlala isikhathi eside kakhulu ebudlelwaneni obunobuthi, uqala ukuzibuza ukuthi ngabe ufanelwe okungaphezulu nokuthi ulufanelwe yini nothando. Mhlawumbe unamathele kulobu budlelwano, ucabanga ukuthi akekho omunye umuntu ongafuna nokuba nawe.

Cabanga futhi!

Lokhu kungumphumela wokuphucwa nokubukelwa phansi kuphela umuntu onemibono ebaluleke kakhulu kuwe. Ungabushiya kanjani ubudlelwano obunobuthi?

Cabanga emuva ukuthi wawunjani ngaphambi kwalobu budlelwano nokuthi ungaqeda kanjani ukuzicabangela eminyakeni emihlanu kusukela manje.

17. Ukubanjwa kobudlelwano

Ezimweni eziningi, umqondo wokubanjwa ebudlelwaneni kungenxa ye- ukuncika phakathi kwabalingani. Mhlawumbe omunye wenu unenkinga yezokwelapha nokuncika komunye?

Ukucabanga ngokushiya kungadala amacala amaningi asigcina sithunjiwe ebudlelwaneni.

Mhlawumbe uzithola ubophezelekile ngokwezezimali. Abanye abantu bancamela ukuhlala kubambiswano olungathandeki kunokulahlekelwa yiyo yonke imali. Lapho sihlala kuphela ukuzinza kwezezimali, singezwa sengathi inkululeko yethu yebiwe kanye nobunikazi bethu.

18. Imizwa engathembekile

Ubuqotho bungenye yezinsika zobudlelwano obunempilo.

Ngaphandle kothando olungenamibandela nolweqiniso, ubudlelwano buba ukuhweba.

Izinto ziba nemibandela - angikwazi ukukunikeza ngaphandle kokuthi unginike okuthile. Ubambiswano baba ubumbano lwezomnotho lwabantu ababili ababheke ukuthi izidingo zabo zifezeke kuqala.

19. Ukuzimela ukungalingani

Lapho abalingani bekhathazeka kakhulu ngenxa yokwesaba ukulahlekelwa omunye obalulekile, bangafuna inkululeko yabo enkulu.

Kwesinye isikhathi, awukho umqondo wokuba wedwa ngenkathi uhleli nomuntu, noma uzizwa ukuthi ukubaluleka kwakho kuncike ekubeni nabo. Lokhu kungaba yizimpawu zokuzimela, ukungalingani, kanye nokuthembela ebudlelwaneni. Lokhu kungazizwa sengathi ulwela njalo ukuphefumula inkululeko noma ngokungapheli ucela ukuhlanganiswa okwengeziwe.

Lokhu kungalingani kuholela ukunganeliseki okunqwabelana kuze kufike eqophelweni lokuqhuma.

20. Ukwamukelwa kwamazinga akade engamukeleki

Ushintsho nokuyekethisa kwenzeka kunoma yibuphi ubuhlobo.

Kodwa-ke, lapho iba banzi, futhi siyekethisa ezindinganisweni nasezinkolelweni zethu eziyinhloko, siba ngabantu esingabathandi noma esibabona esibukweni.

Lolu shintsho kungenzeka lube yisixazululo noma ukuvikelwa kozakwethu okuhlukumezayo esisehluleka noma esenqaba ukuvuma ngalo.

Ukuphika ukuthi sesibe ngumuntu ozoba nomlingani okuhlukumezayo kusivimbela ekukhulumeni futhi siqhubekele phambili.

Uma kungeyena umuntu onomlingani onodlame, ukuhlukunyezwa akwenzeki. Uma kwenzeka, kufanele sivume iqiniso elingajabulisi ngathi nangokukhetha kwethu, okungaba buhlungu njengokuhlukunyezwa uqobo.

21. Ukukhipha okubi kakhulu komunye nomunye

Esinye sezimpawu zobudlelwano obunobuthi ukuletha okubi kakhulu komunye nomunye nokungakwazi ukukudlulisa.

Ngabe uyakubona ukuthukuthela noma ukugxekwa njalo lapho niseduze komunye nomunye ngenkathi nikwazi ukubekezelela osebenza nabo nabangane?

Ngabe usuqalile ukungamthandi umuntu onguye uma unomlingani wakho?

Uma ungakwazi ukubona abantu osube yibo, futhi kungekho lutho oluthuthukayo, mhlawumbe sekuyisikhathi sokuzibuza, “Yikuphi okunye ongakhetha kukho”?

Ukwelulekwa ngokuqinisekile kuyisixazululo esingahle sibe khona. Kungakusiza ukuxazulula inkinga noma ukukhanyise ukuthi awulungile kahle.

Kunoma ikuphi, uzoba nesithombe esicacile nemihlahlandlela engcono yesenzo.

22. Abalokothi bafinyelele kulokho abakulindele

Ngabe umlingani wakho usebenzisa izikhathi zokuzenyeza kwakho futhi usebenzisa amathuba okukubukela phansi, imizamo yakho, ukubukeka, nempumelelo?

Ingabe umlingani wakho akucindezeli ubungeke ube yilutho ngaphandle kwabo? Uma kunjalo, usebudlelwaneni bokukhohlisa nobuyingozi.

Kubambiswano lapho uhlangothi olulodwa lusebenzisa ukukhohlisa nokuphatha kabi ngokomzwelo, elinye ekugcineni lizozizwa lingalufanelekile uthando nokunakwa. Ukuyeka ubudlelwane obunobuthi kuzokusiza ukuthi uqaphele futhi ukwazise ukuzimela namandla akho.

23. Isikhwele sezifo

Umona uyindlela engokwemvelo futhi enempilo eyenzelwe ukuvikela abantu esibathandayo kulabo abangahle babe yizimbangi zethu.

Imvamisa, umona umelela ukusabela okusheshayo, okungasuswa ngokubonisana nathi.

Umhawu owedlulele awunamingcele futhi awukwazi ukubonisana nawo. Ngenxa yokungavikeleki komuntu siqu noma ukubhekelwa phansi, umuntu uzosebenzisa noma yiziphi izindlela zokukugcina useceleni kwabo.

Leyo mizwa ebhebhezelwa phambili ukwesaba ukulahlekelwa othandekayo ingaholela umlingani ekubeni nolaka futhi abe yingozi. Okwamanje, ukushiya ubudlelwane obunobuthi kungaba ukukhetha okuphephe kakhulu.

24. Ukungabi nenhlonipho

Ukungahloniphi kuza ngezindlela eziningi. Kungaziveza njengokubeka okwabo nokunganaki imizwa nezidingo zakho.

Ukuxubha imicabango nemibono yakho, isibonelo, kungenye yezimpawu zokungahloniphi ebudlelwaneni.

Ukukhohlwa izivumelwano ezibalulekile noma ukufika emuva kwesikhathi njalo kukhombisa ukuthi bakukhathalela kangakanani ukuzibophezela okwenziwe kuwe. Uma bahlasela isikhala sakho futhi bakwenza uzizwe umncane, ungakhohliswa.

Uma kufanele uzibuze njalo, "Yimina noma lokhu kuwukungahloniphi?" unempendulo yakho.

25. Ukuziphatha kwezezimali okuyingozi

Ukuziphatha kwezezimali okuyingozi kungahluka ngamandla nangamandla adonsela phansi. Kungaba kusuka ekucabangeni nasekuthabatheni inani elilinganisiwe lemali ngaphandle kokubonisana, ekukhishweni kwezamba ezibalulekile, kuze kufike ekunqabeni ukufinyelela kwizimali ezihlangene.

Ukuba nesiphathimandla somlingani ongakhathaleli imiphumela ukukhetha kwabo kwezezimali okunakho kuyindlela elula yokubona ubudlelwane obunobuthi.

26. Ukungazigcini izithembiso zokushintsha

UThemba ushona ekugcineni. Uma uthola ukuthi usesimeni sethemba elihlala njalo ubeka izizathu zokuthi kungani, futhi, umlingani wakho engakwazanga ukwenza abakuthembisile, ungahle ube ebudlelwaneni obunobuthi. Noma ngemuva kwezethembiso eziningi zokwenza umzamo nokushintsha, abakwenzanga lokho.

Asikwazi ukuhlala ngaphandle kwethemba, noma kuphela kulo.

Uma umlingani wakho elokhu ethi bazokwenza kangcono ngokuzayo futhi bashintshe, kungaba yisikhathi sokuqala ukubuza imibuzo enzima. Ngifuna ukulinda isikhathi esingakanani ngize ngiqiniseke ukuthi ngeke ziguquke, noma ngizimisele ukuqhubeka ngiphile kanjena?

27. Ukuhamba ngamagobongo amaqanda

Uma isimilo somlingani wakho singalindelekile futhi siguquka kangangokuba kufanele unyathele kancane nsuku zonke, “usesigodlweni seqanda.”

Isenzo esisodwa noma amagama ambalwa aphume ngenxa yokukhungatheka noma intukuthelo akumenzi umuntu abe yingozi. Kodwa-ke, ukubonisa okungaguquki kokuziphatha okulimazayo nokungacasuli kungakhombisa ukuthi unobudlelwano nomuntu onobuthi.

28. Ukungazinaki izidingo zakho

Uma ukhuluma ngobudlelwano, akunakugwenywa ukukhuluma ngezidingo zomuntu ngamunye kanye nokulindelwe. Umuntu angadinga umlingani wakhe ukuze abahlekise noma abe ngumeluleki othembekile. Abanye bangacela umlingani wabo ukuthi anikeze ukusekelwa nokuqinisekiswa.

Yize kungafanele ulindele ukuthi bahlangabezane nazo zonke izidingo ezingokomzwelo, ezinye zazo ziyadingeka ukuze kuhlangatshezwane nazo ukuze ubuhlobo buphile. Kubudlelwano obungenampilo, umlingani wenqaba ukuba lapho ngawe futhi akaniki ndawo yokuyekethisa.

29. Ukuhlekwa usulu okungamukeleki

Ukungqubuzana kuyinto evamile futhi kulindelekile kunoma yibuphi ubuhlobo. Lokho, nokho, akusho ukuthi umlingani wakho angakuhleka usulu, akubize ngamagama, akwehlise noma akululaze.

Ikakhulukazi uma kukhona omunye umuntu okhona njengamanje, lokhu kufaka noma yikuphi ukubizwa ngamagama okungakwenza uzizwe ungathandeki futhi uxoshiwe.

30. Ngaphandle kokubona, into engekho engqondweni

Ukunamathisela ngokomzwelo kumlingani wethu kungasho ukuthi isibopho esithuthukisiwe sizohlala siphelele ngenkathi umlingani engekho emzimbeni.

Ukungabikho akufanele kumelele ukulahlwa noma ukungabi nandaba. Ukungabikho kuwuphawu lobudlelwano obunempilo inqobo nje uma kuzuzisa izinhlangothi zombili futhi akuwona umphumela wokushoda kokukhathalelana.

Uma umlingani wakho enyamalala isikhathi eseluliwe futhi ingekho intshisekelo ekhonjisiwe ekuxhumekeni kabusha noma ekungeneni, kungaba yinkomba yokuqhelelana ngokweqile ngokomzwelo.

31. Ukuntula ukwazisa

Ngabe umlingani wakho akabonisi intshisekelo kumaphrojekthi wakho, izinto ozithandayo, noma eminye imisebenzi ebalulekile?

Mhlawumbe bakhipha isinqumo ngokubaluleka kwemisebenzi yakho neminikelo ngokususelwa kunqubo yabo, benganaki ukuthi lokho kubaluleke kangakanani kuwe.

Ezinye izibonelo zingafaka: “Ukuzijabulisa kwakho ngezinto zobumba kumane kungukuchitha isikhathi!” noma “Ngakho-ke kuthiwani uma ushintshe ibha yesithuthi? Cishe umoshe imali nje. ”

Umbono wabo wokutshala amandla ekwenzeni okuthile kubo bobabili usontekile kakhulu, uqhakambisa imizamo yabo futhi ukwenze uzizwe ungathandwa nokunganikeli ngokwanele.

32. Ukungabi nesikhathi sokwabelana nokuthi ukuphi

Ngabe bayahluleka ukuvela lapho kulindeleke futhi abakwazi noma ngeke banikeze incazelo yokulibaziseka?

Ngabe bayakhansela ngomzuzu wokugcina bese benza izinhlelo nabanye abantu, ababonakala bengatholakali kangako futhi kunzima ukuhlela nabo?

Isikhathi esichithwe ndawonye asibaluleki kangako uma kuqhathaniswa nesikhathi sabo sodwa noma isikhathi nabanye abantu. Ngokwengeziwe, abazimisele ukuhlanganyela noma imiphi imininingwane ngokungabikho.

33. Inkani nokulahla impendulo

Inkani iyisici esonakalisa kakhulu, esilethele ubudlelwano obuningi phansi. Umuntu onenkani cishe ngeke avumele noma yikuphi ukufaka, noma kuzosetshenziselwa ukwenza iphuzu labo.

Umlingani onenkani uzoba nokuphawula futhi Ukuphikiswa cishe kunoma iyiphi ingxoxo noma isiphakamiso. Ukuqeda ubudlelwano obunobuthi kaningi kuyindlela eyodwa yokuphoqa umlingani ukuthi abone ukona kwakhe.

34. Ukuqhathanisa okungathandeki

Ngabe umlingani wakho uvame ukukuqhathanisa nabanye abantu, egcizelela ukuphakama kwabo ngaphezu kwakho kwezinye izimfanelo?

Abanye ophathina banenkinga yokugcwalisa izimfanelo zakho futhi bagcina izindawo ezicindezelayo odinga ukuthuthuka kuzo.

Ukubona isici esithile, bakuthola kukhanga kwabanye abantu ngokuzenzakalela kubenza baphawule ngokungabi bikho kwakho. Lokhu kuvame ukuholela ku- okwenza umlingani azizwe engafaneleki noma engafuneki.

35. Ukuya ocansini okuphoqelelwe

Ukuphoqelelwa ngokocansi kunanoma yiluphi uhlobo lwengcindezi engeyona eyemvelo esetshenziselwa ukuphoqa ukuthi uhlanganyele ezenzweni zocansi zanoma yiluphi uhlobo.

Uma uzizwa futhi usho ngokusobala ukuthi awukho esimweni futhi umlingani wakho usaphikelela, leli yifulegi elibomvu lobudlelwano elihlukumeza imingcele.

“Ukube ubungithanda, ubuzokwenza” kungenye yezindawo ezivulekileyo, ukuzama ukukwenza ukholelwe ukuthi awuyena umlingani ofanele uma wenqaba.

Ukuphuma ebudlelwaneni obunobuthi kufanele kube ukukhetha kwakho okuyinhloko uma ukuxhumana nokuhlelwa kwemingcele kungakufinyeleli ndawo.

36. Ukwesaba ulaka lomzimba

Umlingani okhungathekile, ongasenazo ezinye izindlela zokuphoqelela intando yakhe, angasebenzisa i-a ukuboniswa kobudlova bomzimba ukuqinisekisa ukubusa nokuphoqa ukuqhudelana.

Ngeshwa, lokhu akukhawulelwe ebulilini bomhlaseli. Uma uqaphela ukuthi awukhulumi ingqondo yakho ngenxa yokwesaba ukusabela kwabo, sekuyisikhathi sokuthi unakekele ukuphepha kwakho kuqala bese ushiya ubudlelwano obunobuthi.

37. Ukuntela okungafanele ngokuphinga noma ngokulahla

Kwabaningi, ukuphinga nokushiywa kokunye ukukhaphela nokwesaba okukhulu. Ukuntela ngalezo zihloko kungaba nomthelela owehlayo ofakwa ekusaseni lakho njengezithandani.

Uma umlingani wakho eqhubeka nokwenza icala ngemuva kokuba uchazile ukuthi likuthinta kanjani, ingabe sekuyisikhathi sokubuza ukuthi kungani bekhethe ukukulimaza ngamabomu? Lokhu kungaba yihlaya kubo, kepha akusikho kuwe.

Ukwazi ukuthi imizwa yakho ilimele futhi ayimi ngokuziphatha okulimazayo kukhuluma ngokubona kwabo nokuzimisela kwabo ukushintsha.

38. Ukuqedwa kobumfihlo

Sonke sifanelwe izinga elithile lobumfihlo, futhi ebudlelwaneni obunempilo, lokhu ngeke kusetshenziswe kabi.

Uma umlingani wakho eqhubeka nokuhlola ukuthi ukuphi, edlula ocingweni nasezimpahla zakho, khona-ke umlingani wakho weqe imingcele futhi bahlasela isikhala sakho siqu.

39. Ukugwema isikhathi nabangane bakho nomndeni wakho

Uzakwethu onothando ngezikhathi ezithile uzokwamukela ukwenza izinto ezibalulekile kuwe, yize bengathanda ukwenza okunye.

Uma umlingani wakho ephikelela ekugwema ukuchitha isikhathi nabantu bakho, unganqikazi ukubuza ukuthi kungani. Izimpendulo zalo mbuzo zingakukhombisa uma usebudlelwaneni obunobuthi noma cha.

Ukukhetha ukungakwenzi nje ngenxa yokuphazamiseka ngenkathi wazi ukuthi kusho ukuthini kuwe kubonisa ukuzimisela kwabo ukutshala imali ezintweni ezibalulekile kuwe.

40. Ukukhulumela phansi phambi kwabantu

Enye yezindawo ezisebenza kahle kakhulu ukubonisa ukuphakama kunozakwethu iphambi kwabanye abantu. Kungaba buhlungu kakhulu futhi kukwenze uzizwe unamahloni futhi unamahloni.

Ubudlelwano obunobuthi buvame ukwakhiwa kozakwethu oyedwa abazisholo bona njengabakhulu futhi “abaphezulu” futhi basebenzise noma yiliphi ithuba ukukhombisa lokhu, kufaka phakathi ukukhuluma nawe phansi emphakathini.