-Delile
- 1. Ukuqalisa - Ukuqala
- 2. Ukulinga - Ukwazi enye
- 3. Ukuqinisa - Ukuthuthukisa imizwa
- 4. Ukuhlanganisa - Ukuqala kokunye okwengeziwe
- 5. Ukuhlanganisa - Ukuqinisa ubudlelwano
- Ukudla okudlela endlini
Sizungezwe ubudlelwano obuningi kusukela ekuqaleni kwempilo yethu, akunjalo? Lokhu kukhombisa ngokusobala ukuthi ubudlelwano buyingxenye ebalulekile yempilo yethu. Noma ngabe kuyizidingo ezingokomzwelo noma ezomzimba, sinobudlelwano obuningi bomndeni nobungebona obomndeni bokuzifeza.
Ubudlelwano bethu bezinto eziphilayo buyisibusiso ngoba asikho isidingo sokuthi sibuthuthukise; kodwa-ke, obunye ubudlelwano budinga isikhathi nomzamo wentuthuko.
Ubudlelwano bezothando buhamba ngezigaba eziningana zokuthuthuka kobudlelwano ngaphambi kokuba uthando lokuqala nokuheha kuphenduke ukuzibophezela nokubopha okuhlala njalo. Akubona bonke ubudlelwano obudlula kuzo zonke izigaba zokuthuthuka kobudlelwano. Lezi zigaba azilutho kepha ziyindlela abantu abakhomba ngayo ukuthi bafuna ukuba nobani ngokweqiniso, okwedlula indlela omunye umuntu azithwale ngayo.
Nazi izigaba ezi-5 zokuthuthuka kobudlelwano ezinikezwe nguMark Knapp.
1. Ukuqalisa - Ukuqala
Esokuqala ohlwini lwezigaba zokuthuthuka kobudlelwano ukuthwasa, lapho kugxilwe khona kakhulu ekwenzeni umbono omuhle. Abantu bayazana ngalesi sigaba futhi bakhulume ngezinto ezinhle ngabo.
Womabili amaqembu azama ukubonakala ehlekisa, ephumelela futhi enesizotha ukuze athole ukwamukelwa komunye nomunye.
Ukuqalisa isigaba esikhohlisayo ngoba kunquma ukuthi ngabe abantu ababili bahambisana ngokwanele yini ukwakha ubuhlobo noma cha. Uma usesigabeni sokuqala, zama ukugwema ukuziqhayisa ngoba kuzokhipha omunye umuntu.
2. Ukulinga - Ukwazi enye
Akekho umuntu ofuna ukungena ebudlelwaneni futhi afake engcupheni impilo yabo yengqondo nokusebenza ngokomzwelo, akunjalo? Ukugwema ukushesha okunjalo, kungcono ukwenza okuncane kokuzama, okuyikho okushiwo yilesi sigaba sesibili sokuthuthukiswa kobudlelwano.
Kunokunye okwazana kakhulu, futhi abantu baqala ukuhlaziya ngokusondelana.
Bahlangana kaningi futhi bathatha izinyathelo ezihamba kancane kodwa eziqinisekile komunye nomunye. Ukubonana nje emicimbini noma ukuphuza ikhofi kanye ngesonto. Lokhu kunikeza bobabili abantu ikhefu kusuka komunye nomunye, futhi baqala ukucabanga ngomunye nomunye ngokucace kakhudlwana. Womabili la maqembu athanda ukuhlola izinto ezifana nokufana, ukusondelana, kanye nokuzazi ngesikhathi sokuhlolwa.
3. Ukuqinisa - Ukuthuthukisa imizwa
Ukuqinisa ngesinye sezinyathelo ezinzima kunazo zonke zokuthuthuka kobudlelwano selokhu abantu baqala ukutshala imali ngokomzwelo. Babelana ngemininingwane yesikhathi sabo esedlule nezinhlelo zesikhathi esizayo ezenza omunye abone ngokujulile kubo.
Lesi yisigaba esiphakeme sobudlelwano, lapho konke kubonakala kukuhle, futhi kukhona le njabulo enkulu.
Abantu bakuthola kunzima ukuhlala kude komunye nomunye futhi baqhubeke becabanga ngokuthi ubudlelwano bungakhula kanjani buqhubeke.
Ukuzibophezela kuqala ukukhula esigabeni sokuqina futhi. Abantu baqala ukubona izinhlangothi ezimnyama zomunye nomunye kulesi sigaba futhi futhi bazame ukuxazulula noma yiziphi izingxabano ezivela.
Kukhona umzamo osebenzayo wokuxazulula izinkinga nokwenza ubuhlobo busebenze ngoba konke kusha. Abantu baqala futhi ukungabaza uhlobo lobuhlobo abaya kulo futhi balindeleni kubo.
4. Ukuhlanganisa - Ukuqala kokunye okwengeziwe
Ukuhlanganiswa kuyisigaba esihle ngoba abantu banesiqiniseko ngobudlelwano babo futhi banethemba lokuthi buzosebenza. Basuse noma yikuphi ukungabaza futhi bayazi ukuthi bafunani komunye nomunye nokuthi yini ngokwabo abangayinikeza. Kungukuphakama kothando nobubele ezigabeni zokuthuthuka kobuhlobo bezothando.
Kukhona ukuxhumana okuqinile kulesi sigaba, futhi abantu bafuna ukuzibophezela ngesikhathi sokuhlanganiswa.
Kufanele, noma kunjalo, bacabangele futhi bakhulume ngokujulile ngamathemba esikhathi esizayo obudlelwano babo.
5. Ukuhlanganisa - Ukuqinisa ubudlelwano
Ukuhlanganisa yisibopho sokugcina phakathi kwezigaba zokuthuthuka kobuhlobo bothando njengoba abantu beqala ukubhalisa ubuhlobo babo ngokusemthethweni kulesi sigaba. Imibhangqwana iyashada futhi iyathathana phambi kwabangane bayo nomndeni wayo ukuqinisekisa ukuhlangana okuqinile.
Kulesi sigaba sokuthuthuka kobudlelwano, cishe akukho zingxabano selokhu zixazululwe ezingeni langaphambilini, futhi abantu bavame ukuba nethemba elikhulu ngobudlelwano babo.
Ukubopha ifindo lomshado uma kwenzeka ubudlelwano bezothando nokuqiniswa kwesibopho ezingeni elijule kakhulu uma kwenzeka ubudlelwano beplato kuyisisekelo salesi sigaba.
Ukudla okudlela endlini
Zonke lezi zigaba zokuthuthuka kobudlelwano zihlangene futhi zidinga ukuthathelwa phezulu ngoba zikusiza ukuthi ungene ebudlelwaneni obunenjongo. Abantu abathanda ukuqaphela imimoya bese bephuthuma ebudlelwaneni kudingeka behlise ijubane futhi babone izinto kahle.
Ukuheha nokusondelana kubaluleke kakhulu ekwenzeni izigaba zokuthuthuka kobuhlobo bezothando zibe bushelelezi futhi zijabulise. Gcina ilukuluku liphila futhi lapho uqala ubudlelwano obusha ukuze ukwazi ukwazi izinto ezincane ngomunye nomunye ezenza ubudlelwano buqine.