-Delile
- Ingabe ukwehlukana kungawusindisa umshado?
- 1. Isikhathi
- 2. Imigomo
- 3. Ukuxhumana
- 4. Izinsuku
- 5. Izingane
- 6. Ukwesekwa okuvela eceleni
Nasi isimo sempilo yangempela.
"UJohn noKatie sebeneminyaka eyishumi bengajabule beshadile behlala ngokukhathazeka okungapheli nokukhathazeka".
Ngemuva kweminyaka eminingi yomshado nokukhulisa izingane, uJohn wazithola esecabanga ukuthi akajabule ngomshado wakhe. Wayesindwa yizinkinga zokwethembana,ukuntuleka kokuxhumana, futhi ukusondelana izinkinga ezikhungethe umshado wabo.
UJohn watshela umkakhe ukuthi ufuna ukwehlukana. Unkosikazi wakhe wavuma base bakhetha ukuthatha ikhefu lezinyanga eziyisithupha emshadweni wabo. ”
Ziningi izinto ezingadala ukuchitheka emshadweni wakho. Kepha, ungagcina umshado wakho ngaphambi kokuthi uphelele enkantolo ngesahlukaniso.
Kodwa, 'kufanele sihlukane noma cha?'
Yebo, ukwahlukana kubonakala kuyindlela esebenzayo kwabaningi. Lokhu kuveza ithuba lokucabanga ngezinto ezibalulekile ezidala uthuthuva emshadweni wakho.
Kepha ngaphambi kokuthi konke kulahleke, udinga ukuzama ukugcina umshado wakho, okokugcina. Ngemuva kwakho konke, isehlukaniso asisoze saba ukuphela kwendlela yokubalekela izingqinamba zomshado.
Ingabe ukwehlukana kungawusindisa umshado?
Kunezizathu ezintathu eziyinhloko zokwehlukana noshade naye.
Okokuqala, kuyisinyathelo senqubo yesehlukaniso. Iningi lezithandani ziyazi nje ukuthi umshado wazo ngeke uhlale futhi usebenzise ukwahlukana ukuzinika isikhathi ngaphambi kwesehlukaniso. Kwesinye isikhathi, imibhangqwana iyahlukana ukuze ithole umbono ngomshado wayo, (njengoJohn noKatie). Ngemuva kokwehlukana kwabo, uJohn noKatie bakwazi ukuhlangana futhi ngempumelelo futhi baqinisa imishado yabo.
Ukwehlukana kungasiza ekuthuthukiseni ubudlelwano bakho nomlingani wakho futhi kulondoloze nomshado wakho, ekugcineni.
Ukuthatha isinqumo sokuhlukana nowakwakho akulula. Imibhangqwana ethatha isinqumo sokuhlala ngokwehlukana ibukwa kakhulu ngabangaphandle njengalabo abafinyelele eqophelweni lobudlelwano babo.
Mhlawumbe, bazamile amanye amaqhinga nokungenelela ukusiza imishado yabo, kepha akukho okungenzeka kubasebenzelile. Ngakho ekugcineni, bahlukana futhi ekugcineni, bahlukanisa.
Pho kungani abantu abashadile behlukana kodwa bengahlukanisi? Kukhona olunye uhlangothi kulokhu, ngemuva kwakho konke. Imibhangqwana ayikaze iyeke ukuhlola inani lokwelashwa lokwehlukana. Eqinisweni, uma kwenziwa ngendlela eyiyo (nangezizathu ezifanele) ngezivumelwano ezicacile ekuqaleni, ngeke nje kusindise umshado wakho kepha futhi kukhulise futhi.
Ukuze kuzuzwe inhloso yokugcina (Ukwehlukanisa ukusindisa noma ukuthuthukisa umshado wakho), Udinga ukuqinisekisa ukuthi kunezinto ezimbalwa ezikhona ngaphambi kokuthi ungene.
Nazi izikhombisi ezimbalwa noma amathiphu wokwehlukanisa umshado angasiza -
1. Isikhathi
Lokhu kungahluka kuyo yonke imibhangqwana, kepha izinyanga ezi-6 kuya kwezi-8 zesikhathi sokuhlukanisa ikakhulu zithathwa njengezifanele.
Inkinga enkulu yokwehlukaniswa komshado okwandisiwe ukuthi imvamisa kungaholela kubo bobabili abalingani ekutholeni ukunethezeka ngezindlela zabo zokuphila ezintsha, okubaholela ekukholweni ukuthi ukungaboni ngaso linye kwabo akunakusonjululwa noma ukuthi bangcono kakhulu ngale ndlela.
Yingakho ukubeka okulindelekile okucacile nokunengqondo kubaluleke kakhulu. Ngokusetha ubude bokwehlukana kwenu, niyavumelana ukuthi lesi yisikhathi enidinga ngaso nobabili ukuxazulula ukungezwani kwenu.
Uma kushiywe kunganqunywa, izingqinamba ezintsha zingaqhamuka ezingaholela ekungqubuzaneni okuningi. Ngabe ukwehlukana kuyasindisa umshado? Yebo, kunezikhathi lapho ukwahlukana okwandisiwe kususa ngokuphelele konke ukuxhumana phakathi kwabashadikazi.
Ngakho-ke, uma kufanele usindise umshado wakho esehlukanisweni, kufanele uphinde ubheke isikhathi sokuhlukana komshado wakho ngaphambi kokuphuma emnyango wakho.
2. Imigomo
Ungawusindisa kanjani umshado ngesikhathi sokuhlukana? Ukuxoxa nomlingani wakho njalo kuyindlela engcono yokwenza ukwahlukana nokuxazulula izindaba ndawonye njengeqembu.
Ungalokothi ucabange ukuthi nobabili nisekhasini elilodwa. Xoxani futhi nivume ukuthi nobabili nikwenza lokhu ukuxazulula izindaba zenu nokuthuthukisa umshado wenu.
Ngokwesibonelo -
Uma omunye wabalingani efuna ukusindisa umshado, kepha omunye ecabanga ukuthi lokhu kungukuqala nje kwenqubo yesehlukaniso, lokhu kungaholela ezinkingeni ezinkulu zokwethembana. Kungakho ukuxoxa ngalolu daba kusenesikhathi kubalulekile ukuze wenze lokhu kube yimpumelelo.
3. Ukuxhumana
Ngemuva kokuthatha isinqumo sokuthi nobabili nifuna ukubhekana nezinkinga zenu ngokuqhubeka ngokuhlukana ukuze nisindise umshado, xoxani ngokuthi nizoxhumana kanjani phakathi kwalesi sikhathi.
Ukungaxhumani nhlobo ngokusobala ngeke kusize ngalutho ekufinyeleleni inhloso yokugcina. Nquma ngemvamisa yokuxhumana kwakho kahle ngaphambili. Uma omunye umlingani efisa ukukhuluma nsuku zonke, kodwa omunye efuna ukuthi kube yinto yamasonto onke, lapho-ke kufanele kwenziwe isinqumo ngokuvumelana.
Uma ufisa ukusindisa umshado wakho, kuzofanele nivumelane ngokuvumelana ngalesi sigaba sokwehlukana okwesikhashana.
4. Izinsuku
Ingabe kufanele nihlukane ngaphambi kwesehlukaniso? Kufanele uyeke ukubonana ngemuva kokuhlukaniswa?
Ukwehlukana akubandakanyi ukuthi niyeke ukuthandana. Nqumani ukuthi niyohlangana kangaki futhi nichithe isikhathi nobabili.
Iya ezinsukwini zokudla bese uxhuma kabusha ngokomzwelo noshade naye. Sebenzisa lesi sikhathi ukubonisana ngokuthi zingalungiswa kanjani izindaba ezidala uthuthuva ebudlelwaneni. Thola izixazululo ezintsha ongaletha kuzo emshadweni wakho.
Esikhundleni sokusondelana ngokomzimba, gxila ekuzihlanganiseni kwakho ngokomzwelo bese uzama ukukukhulisa. Lokhu kungakusiza ukuthi ugcine umshado wakho esehlukanisweni.
5. Izingane
Ukwehlukaniswa kungaba yisikhathi esiphazamisayo ezinganeni zakho, ngakho-ke sebenzisa izindlela ezizokusiza ube ngumzali osebenza kahle. Phendula imibuzo yezingane zakho ndawonye futhi uqiniseke ukuthi ulawula izimpendulo zakho ezingezinhle (ezifana nentukuthelo, ukubiza ngamagama, njll) phambi kwazo.
6. Ukwesekwa okuvela eceleni
Ukufuna umuntu wesithathu, njengomelaphi, abefundisi, noma umlamuli (ilunga lomndeni noma umngani), kungenza kube lula inqubo yokuxazulula izingqinamba zakho.
Kunconywa kakhulu ukuthi ufune uhlobo oluthile losizo ngesikhathi senqubo yokwehlukanisa ukusindisa umshado wakho esehlukanisweni.
Isiphetho
Lapho sinomuzwa wokuthi oshade naye uyasishiya kithi, isenzo sethu semvelo ukusondela kubo futhi senze noma yini edingekayo ukusindisa umshado. Umcabango wokwehlukana, noma ukudala ibanga ngesikhathi esinjalo, ufaka umuzwa wokwethuka, ukwesaba, ukungabaza, kanye nokukhathazeka okukhulu futhi.
Ukusebenzisa inketho enjalo kungaba yinselele ikakhulukazi lapho isibopho sintekenteke noma ubudlelwane buthaka kakhulu.
Kepha ngokusebenzisa ukunakekela nekhono (imvamisa ngosizo lochwepheshe), ukwahlukana KUNGENZA ngempumelelo ekusebenziseni abantu ababili ndawonye. Eqinisweni, ukonga umshado wakho ngemuva kokuhlukana kuzoba lula kakhulu.
Khumbula ukuthi leli thuluzi akulona elabo abangahlose ukuhlala nabalingani babo. Into ebi kakhulu ongayenza kubo ukwenza sengathi unentshisekelo yokulungisa izinto.