-Delile
Enye yezinzuzo ezanelisa kakhulu zobungane nobudlelwano bothando ukwakha ukuxhumana ezingeni elijulile nomlingani wakho noma nabangane.
Lapho sizwa ukuxhumana kwethu nalabo esibathandayo, sizwa injabulo ephelele yokuba ngumuntu obalulekayo ophethe indawo ebalulekile emhlabeni.
Lo muzwa wokuxhumeka uyingxenye ebalulekile yenhlala-kahle yethu. Kusikhumbuza ukuthi ukuphila kwethu kunenjongo; kusivikela ekubeni nesizungu futhi kufakazela ukuthi sonke siyingxenye yomndeni wesintu.
Ukuxhuma ngokomzwelo nomlingani wakho kuyingxenye ebalulekile yenqubo yokuwela othandweni, futhi okuvame ukwenzeka ngokwemvelo njengoba uchitha isikhathi nomlingani wakho ubathola nokuthi balibona kanjani izwe elibazungezile.
Njengoba wabelana ngemibono yakho, uluka lokhu kuxhumana okungokomzwelo ebudlelwaneni, okungenye yezintambo zezinsizwa ezigcina ubudlelwano bakho bothando buzinzile futhi buyigcina ingandizi ngisho nangezikhathi zokungezwani nezinye izikhathi ezingemnandi neze ezenzeka yonke imishado.
Kepha kuthiwani uma unenkinga yokuxhumana ngokomzwelo noshade naye noma umlingani wakho?
Uyazi ukuthi uyathandana, futhi ufuna ukwenza isiqiniseko sokuthi lolu thando luhlala luqinile. Uyazi ukuthi ukuxhumana ngokomzwelo emshadweni nakubudlelwano kubaluleke njengokwenyama.
Ngakho-ke, ungaxhumana kanjani nomlingani wakho noma ikakhulukazi ukuthi ungaxhumana kanjani ngokomzwelo noshade naye?
Yiziphi ezinye zezindlela ongaqiniseka ngazo ukuthi wenza konke okusemandleni ukutshala, ukondla nokuthambekela ekuxhumaneni kwakho nomzwelo nomlingani wakho ukuze kuqhakaze futhi kube nezimpande ukuze kukusize ezikhungwini ezingaba khona ngesikhathi sakho impilo ndawonye?
Buka futhi:
Ukukusiza uqonde ukuthi ungaxhumana kanjani nowakwakho ngokomzwelo noma ukuthi ungaxhumana kanjani nomlingani wakho ngokomzwelo, nazi ezinye izindlela zokuxhumana ngokomzwelo nomyeni noma unkosikazi wakho.
Isibopho ngendlela enempilo kunazo zonke
Ukuxhuma ngokomzwelo nomlingani wakho kuqala ngesibopho, futhi leso sibopho sidinga ukwakhiwa ngendlela enempilo. Nazi ezinye zezinto ezakha ukuxhumana ngokomzwelo okunempilo:
1. Prakthiza uzwela
Uzibuza, ungaxhumana kanjani nomlingani wakho ngokomzwelo? Qala ngokufunda nokusebenzisa uzwela.
Uzwela isenzo sokuzibeka ezicathulweni zomunye, sokubona izinto ngombono wazo.
Uma uzwelana noshade naye, uthintana nabo ngokomzwelo ngoba bayabona ukuthi ubazi kahle, ungasebenzisa "amehlo nenhliziyo" yabo ukubheka izinto ngendlela yabo.
Imibhangqwana exhumene ngokomzwelo yenza uzwela hhayi kuphela nabalingani bayo kepha nabo bonke abantu abahamba izindlela zabo usuku ngalunye: abazali, izingane, abangane, osebenza nabo, i-barista e-Starbucks ... wonke umuntu!
2. Lalelisisa
Ukulalela okusebenzayo kukuxhumanisa ngokomzwelo nomlingani wakho njengoba kubonisa ukuthi ubambe iqhaza ngokuphelele engxoxweni. Ukulalela okusebenzayo kuqinisekisa imizwa yomunye umuntu.
Ukulalela ngenkuthalo, vumela umlingani wakho ukuthi akhulume. Bese uphinda okuzwile, usebenzisa amagama akho. Ingxoxo ngemisebenzi yasendlini ingahle ibukeke kanjena:
Uthe: “Ngikhathele ngempela ukuba ngedwa obonakala ekhathazekile ngokugcina ikhishi lihlanzekile.”
"Kuzwakala sengathi awutholi usizo oludingayo ukuze uthole ikhishi."
Yena: “Uqinisile. Angikwazi ukukwenza konke mina. ”
“Ngitshele ukuthi ngingakusiza kanjani. Ungathanda sihlukaniselane umsebenzi wokuhlanza ekhishini? ”
Ukulalela okungasebenzi kungaba ukusebenzisa izimpendulo zamagama amafushane njenge-oh, kulungile, noma yini, kupholile, u-huh.
Lawa ngamagama agcwalisayo futhi awakhombisi ukuthi ubamba iqhaza engxoxweni ngendlela enengqondo. (Ungase ujwayele ukuzwa lezi zimpendulo ezimfushane lapho ukhuluma nentsha!)
3. Yakhani ukuvumelana ndawonye
Noma omunye wenu kunguye owondla umndeni, ukunquma ukuthi uzoyisebenzisa kanjani leyo mali kufanele kube yisinqumo esihlanganyelwe.
Noma ngabe uthatha isinqumo sokusiphula umndeni ukuze uthole umsebenzi ongcono noma uthuthukise ikhaya lakho, ukuxhuma ngokomzwelo nomlingani wakho lalelani imibono yomunye nomunye ngalezi zinqumo ezinkulu noma ngabe umuntu oyedwa kuphela emshadweni ozobakhipha.
4. Amandla ayalingana emshadweni
Imibhangqwana exhumene ngokomzwelo inamandla alinganayo, futhi ibheka njengabalinganayo. Izwi ngalinye lithwala isisindo esilinganayo ekhaya.
Izithiyo ekuxhumaneni ngokomzwelo
Kunezindlela ezithile zokuhlobana nezinye ezimi endleleni yokuxhumana nomlingani wakho, kepha zonke lezi zinganqotshwa ngomzamo othile wokuzinikela, okunikezwe mhlawumbe ngumuntu wangaphandle onjengomelaphi. Lokhu kufaka phakathi:
- Omunye wabantu abasebudlelwaneni angazizwa engakhululekile ukusebenzisa izindlela ezinjengokuthi "ukulalela okusebenzayo" kanye "nokuzwela."
- Omunye wabantu abasebudlelwaneni angahle angathandi ukuhlola imizwelo esindayo ebangeni eliseduze
- Omunye wabantu abasebudlelwaneni angacabanga ukuthi ukusebenzisa isikhathi ukwakha ukuxhumana okungokomzwelo kudinga amandla amaningi
- Uhlobo lomuntu lomuntu “ngena wenze umsebenzi wenziwe” futhi uyacunuka ngokuthi ukuxhuma ngokomzwelo akusheshi futhi akulula
- Izindima ezithile sezakhekile kule mbhangqwana, ngenxa yokuthi umuntu oyedwa kube nguyena "onemizwa", bese kuthi omunye kube "owama-stoic, ongazizwa". Ukushintsha izindima kungumsebenzi onzima futhi kudinga ukulungiswa kwamandla ezithandani.
Kulezi zimo, kubalulekile ukuthi abashadile basebenzisane ukuze banqobe lezi zithiyo. Uma kungenjalo, ubudlelwano bungasebenza, kepha ngaphandle kokujula nokwaneliseka okuhlinzekwa ukuxhuma okungokomzwelo.
Ubudlelwano obungekho entweni yokuxhumana ngokomzwelo bufana nokubambisana, futhi lokho akuyona into abantu abaningi abayifunayo lapho bethandana.
Lapho usuthole amakhono okuxhumana ngokomzwelo nomlingani wakho, uzothola ukuthi ikhono lakho lokuxhumana nabanye abakuzungezile liba lula, libe ngokwemvelo, futhi lenelise ngokwedlulele.
Enye yezinto ezinhle ozozithatha umuzwa wokuba ngowakho ozozizwa; lowo muzwa wokufakwa okukuhluphayo futhi okukhumbuze ukuthi awuwedwa njengoba uhamba emhlabeni.
Futhi lokhu kuyinjongo yangempela yomshado: ukuhlanganisa abantu ababili ndawonye ezingeni lomzimba nelingokomzwelo ukuze bakwazi ukuhlinzekana ngomuzwa wokuthi bangabakubo futhi bazizwe “besekhaya.”