-Delile
- Akusilo iphutha lesikhathi, yimikhuba yakho
- Wena noma umlingani wakho anikwazi ukususa okwedlule
- Ukungabi nokusondelana noma ukuzethemba?
Cishe kucacisa ukuthi njengoba umshado wakho ungena eminyakeni eminingi, uzohlangabezana nokuswela kobudlelwano phakathi kwakho nomlingani wakho. Wonke amahlaya othando nosomahlaya asukume enze iphuzu lokusebenzisa leli qiniso elijwayelekile ngokuhleka okumbalwa. Ngezikhathi kuza ukujwayela, futhi ngokujwayela, ukusondelana kungabhekana nobunzima.
Njengoba kulula njengoba kungaba ukumane ushaye ubude bobudlelwano bakho, kunezinye izinto eziningi ezidlalayo. Kunezimbangela eziningi ezingaba khona zokwehla kwenani lokusondelana ngokomzimba nangokomzwelo, futhi kufanelekile isikhathi sokuhlola ngasinye. Qhubeka ufunde njengoba singena kokungahle kube kudala ibanga phakathi kwakho nomlingani wakho.
Akusilo iphutha lesikhathi, yimikhuba yakho
Ake sikususe lokhu endleleni, ngoba kungaba yisizathu sokwehla kobudlelwano bakho.
Ukukhuluma iqiniso, akulona iphutha lesikhathi. Kumayelana nokujwayela nokwethemba okuthole ngaphezu kwaleyo nkathi yesikhathi okunikela ekunqanyulweni kwakho. Cabanga nganoma yini oyenzayo kaninginingi nsuku zonke.
Uma uxubha amazinyo, awucabangi ngokuthi ukwenze kanjani noma yiziphi izingqimba okufanele ngabe uzisebenzisa; wenza into efanayo oyenze izolo ungacabanganga ngayo.
Uma ugeza, kungenzeka ukuthi awazi ukuthi wenza ziphi i-oda noma uhlu lokuhlola olusebenza lapho uzigeza. Konke okwenzayo ukuphindaphinda irobhothi inqubo obekade uyisebenzisela iminyaka.
Amaphethini owasebenzisayo ukugeza nokuxubha ahlawuliswe isikhathi eside. Ngokukhanya okufanayo, amaphethini akho wokuziphatha okusondelene noshade naye kungenzeka ukuthi azinze ekuziphatheni okuzenzakalelayo. Niyaqabulana ekuseni okuhle, niqabulana ubusuku obuhle, bese ugcine ucansi ngosuku lokuzalwa noma isikhumbuzo.
Ukuqinisa i-monotony, wena nomlingani wakho kufanele nenze umzamo wokubambisana ukuze niqaphele ngokwengeziwe ukuthi nihlangana kanjani ngokomzimba nangokomzwelo. Uma ungahle ube nenhloso yokuthi uziphatha kanjani ngokusondelene futhi kangaki, uzoba nokulawula okwengeziwe ngomphumela wenqubo.
Vuka kwimikhuba yakho futhi uzokwazi ukuyiguqula ukusiza wena nomlingani wakho nizizwe nisondelene kakhulu kunakuqala.
Wena noma umlingani wakho anikwazi ukususa okwedlule
Yize ukusondelana kubonakala sengathi kuyisihloko esithinta wena nomlingani wakho kuphela, kungahle kube nokuningi kunalokho.
Kuphakathi kokuthi wena noma oshade naye ninemizwa ejulile mayelana nokusondelana ngenxa yobudlelwano bangaphambilini. Kungenzeka ukuthi unkosikazi wakho wake wanukubezwa ngokocansi ngowayengumlingani wakho, ngakho-ke akakhululeki ukusondela kuwe kaningi ngaphezu kwesisodwa noma kabili ngesonto. Umyeni wakho kungenzeka ukuthi ukhohlisiwe, ngakho-ke onogada bakhe ngokomzimba nangokomzwelo banenkinga yokuza kuwe ebudlelwaneni bakho bamanje.
Noma ngabe yini indaba yesikhathi esedlule, kubalulekile ukuthi ingabi yindlovu egumbini. Uma kungakhulunywa isikhathi eside kakhulu, ukungabi bikho kobuhlobo obusondelene nabo, ngenxa yakho, kungakhulisa ukungezwani. Uma kukhulunywa nayo ngqo - ngokusekelwa ngumeluleki noma owelaphayo – ungabona inkinga yokusondelana ngenhloso yayo yangempela; ukuhlukumezeka okwedlule umuntu abhekana nakho.
Ukungabi nokusondelana noma ukuzethemba?
Uma wena noma umlingani wakho unqikaza ukwenza okuthile okusondelene, kungahle kube ngenxa yokuzethemba okuphansi.
Noma ngabe nobabili niyathandana futhi nizizwa niphephile komunye nomunye, kungenzeka ukuthi imicabango yokuthi “angifanele” isabhebhetheke kakhulu. Umlingani wakho angakubuka futhi acabange ukuthi umzimba wabo wenyama ulihlazo ngokuqhathanisa. Esikhundleni sokubuka umzuzu osondelene njengethuba lokuxhuma, bangavele banamathele emakhanda abo, bacabange ukuthi banamahloni kangakanani ukuthi kufanele ubabone behamba ze njalo lapho ugxuma embhedeni.
Okuphambene nalokho nakho kungaba yiqiniso. Ukuzethemba kwakho kungenzeka kube yikhona okudala ukwehlukana ebuhlotsheni bakho obuseduze. Ungahle ufune ukusondelana kakhulu nomlingani wakho, kepha ngokungazi uzizwa ungabalulekile futhi ungathandeki kangako ngokuqhathanisa. Ungahle umemeze, "Yenza uthando kimi!" ngaphandle, kodwa ekujuleni, ukungazethembi kwakho kuyamemeza, “Uma engathandani nami, khona-ke akangikhangi, akangithandi, futhi kungenzeka ukuthi ulele nje nomunye umuntu wesifazane!”
Kunoma ikuphi, ukungazethembi kuzoqhubeka nokushayela phakathi kwakho nomlingani wakho. Into engcono kakhulu ongayenza ukuqaphela lokhu njengezimbangela ezingaba khona futhi nikhumbuzane ukuthi asikho isizathu sokuzizwa ningaphephile lapho nikhona komunye nomunye. Ukususa ngokungaguquguquki leyo micabango engavikelekile kuzokuvumela wena nomlingani wakho ukuthi nisondelane kakhulu kunendlela obucabanga ngayo.
Isiphetho
Akunandaba ukuthi yini imbangela yokuntuleka kokusondelana; okubalulekile ukuwakhomba ngakho akuholeli ekuhlukaneni okuqhubekayo phakathi kwenu nobabili.
Musa ukwahlulela ukungavikeleki okuvelayo.
Ungadinwa yisikhathi esedlule.
Ungacabangi ukuthi awukwazi ukufundisa inja endala amaqhinga amasha.
Uma inhloso ukusondela kumyeni noma unkosikazi wakho ngaphakathi nangaphandle kombhede, khona-ke yenza noma yini ongakwenza ukuze uhambe ngezindlela zakho zokusondelana okubalwe ngenhla.
Umshado wakho kufanele uwulwele, futhi ngaphandle kokuxhumeka okusondele ngokomzwelo nangokomzimba, kuzoba nzima kakhulu ukugcina lowo mlilo ovuthayo uvutha ukhanya.