-Delile
- 1. Awukwazi ukuvumela okwedlule
- 2. Nilwa ngayo yonke into
- 3. Ukufihla imali
- 4. Anenzi izinqumo ndawonye
- 5. Uqala ukucabanga ngalokho okungenzeka ukuthi uye wakwenza
- 6. Ukungathembeki
- 7. Amakamelo okulala ahlukene
- 8. Ucansi selunciphile
- 9. Awusazinakekeli
- 10. Uqala ukwethula iziphazamiso ukucasha ngezinkinga zakho
- Ezinye izimpawu ezisobala zesixwayiso
Ingabe kukhona okuthile ngemuva kwengqondo yakho okuhlala kukutshela ukuthi kukhona okungahambi kahle ebudlelwaneni bakho? Umshado onenkinga awusho ukuphela kobudlelwano bakho. Ukwamukela lezi zimpawu ngaphambi kokuba sekwephuze kakhulu kungaba umusa osindisa wena nomlingani wakho. Uma umshado wakho ubalulekile kuwe, akufanele neze ulinde isikhathi eside ngaphambi kokwenza okuthile ngokuwulungisa.
Ungase ucabange ngezimpawu zokuxwayisa ngobuhlobo njengento esobala njengokuhlala isikhathi eside emsebenzini noma ukukhombisa izimpawu zokuthandana. Iqiniso ukuthi, ukusayina ukuthi ubudlelwano bakho busenkingeni kungacasha ngaphansi kwekhala lakho. Izinguquko zingahamba kancane kakhulu kunzima ukuzibona. Ungabanjwa ungazelele ebuhlotsheni bakho. Sebenzisa lezi zimpawu eziyishumi zokuxwayisa ukuthi usemshadweni onezinkinga.
1. Awukwazi ukuvumela okwedlule
Izifungo zomshado zisho ibinzana elithi "kokuhle noma okubi" ngesizathu. Umshado unezikhathi zawo ezinhle nezimbi, kanti ezinye zalezo zingcindezi zingaba nzima. Kodwa-ke, umbhangqwana ozinikele komunye nomunye uthola indlela yokunqoba ukungathembeki, ukucasulwa nezikhathi ezinzima futhi ufunde ukuxolelana ngamaphutha abo. Kodwa-ke, labo ababhekene nomgwaqo onamadwala womshado onenkinga bangathola ukuthi ubuwula obuthethelelwe bezinsuku ezedlule bukhuliswa kaninginingi.
Ukwakha izimpikiswano ezindala esezithethelelwe vele kuyisibonakaliso sokuthi awusazizwa uxhumekile nomlingani wakho.
2. Nilwa ngayo yonke into
Imibhangqwana ehlukana ngezindlela ezingokomzwelo iqala ukuntula ukubekezela eyayikade inakho sokubekezelela amaphutha omunye nomunye. Uma ungalethi izimpikiswano ezindala, kubonakala ngathi awunankinga yokuthola izihloko ezintsha ongaxabana ngazo. Eqinisweni, izimpikiswano zakho azipheli futhi kubonakala sengathi ulwa ngezihloko ezifanayo kaninginingi. Kusuka ezindabeni ezibucayi ezinjengemali, ukuhlela umndeni, nokwethembeka kulokho okhohlwe ukuphonsa ujeke ongenalutho kudoti, manje usunenqolobane yama-nitpick obonakala sengathi awusayeki.
3. Ukufihla imali
Ukufihla imali komunye wakho obalulekile, noma ukufihlelwa imali kuwuphawu olubi lokuthi usemshadweni onezinkinga. Ukufihla imali kuvamise ukukhombisa ukuthi umlingani akasazizwa ekhululekile noma akathembi ngokwanele ukuthi ahlanganyele isimo sakhe sezezimali nomlingani wakhe womshado. Kungakhombisa nokuthi umzamo wokonga ngasese imali eyanele ukuphuma nokulandela ukwehlukana. Ukufihla izimali futhi kungaba yindlela yokuvikela umlingani oyedwa ekuboneni ukusetshenziswa kwemali okungekho emthethweni ezintweni ezinjengegumbi lehhotela, izipho, noma ezinye izindleko ezihlobene nokuthandana.
4. Anenzi izinqumo ndawonye
Umshado ubambiswano. Lokhu izimpilo ezimbili zihlangana futhi zinquma ngokulinganayo ukuthi ziqhubekela phambili kanjani ngezinqumo ezibalulekile. Isikhathi ovala ngaso umlingani wakho ngaphandle kwezinqumo ezimayelana nezimali, ikhaya lakho, izingane zakho, noma ubudlelwano bakho kufanele kube yifulegi elibomvu elikhulu kakhulu.
5. Uqala ukucabanga ngalokho okungenzeka ukuthi uye wakwenza
Lapho abantu besebudlelwaneni obungeneme bathambekele ekugxileni ekubonaneni kokugcina kwezothando okubenze bajabula. Lokhu kungaba yi-fling yasehlobo, i-ex, noma uthando lokuqala. Abanye bangaze baqale ukuzibuza ukuthi bangaba nempilo enjani nomngani osondelene nabo noma osebenza naye.
6. Ukungathembeki
Yize kuyinto ejwayelekile ukuqaphela abobulili obuhlukile, kunomehluko omkhulu phakathi kokubona umuntu ekhanga futhi ehehwa nguye. Lapho uqala ukuhlala ebudlelwaneni obunokwenzeka bokuya ocansini nomuntu ongashadile naye ucela inkinga. Kokubili abesilisa nabesifazane bayakhohlisa ngezizathu ezifanayo: ukuhlangabezana nezidingo zomzimba kuyahlangatshezwa noma ukuntuleka kokuxhumana ngokomzwelo nokuqinisekiswa. Kuyacaca ukuthi ukukopela kungaphezu kwesixwayiso sokuthi ubuhlobo bakho busenkingeni.
7. Amakamelo okulala ahlukene
Amakamelo okulala ahlukile angaholela ezimpilweni ezihlukene. Ngokwesayensi, ukuthinta ngokomzimba kuyisici esibalulekile somuzwa oxhunywe kumlingani wakho futhi kungakhipha ukuqhuma kwe-oxytocin. Akunandaba ukuthi lokhu kuzibonakalisa ngokubambana ngezandla noma nge-spooning ebusuku. Vele, konke lokhu kuncike emikhubeni yenu yomuntu siqu njengabantu abathandanayo. Isibonelo, uma uhlale ulala emakamelweni okulala ahlukene ngenxa yezikhathi zomsebenzi ezingqubuzanayo noma izingqinamba zokulala lokhu bekungeke kube yimbangela yokwethuka.
8. Ucansi selunciphile
Ushintsho ekusondelaneni ngokobulili alulungile neze ebudlelwaneni. Imvamisa abesifazane balahlekelwa wuthando kwezocansi nabalingani babo ngenxa yokuntuleka kokuxhumana ngokomzwelo, kuyilapho abesilisa belahlekelwa yintshisekelo ngoba banesithukuthezi. Kunoma yikuphi, ukuntuleka kocansi ebuhlotsheni kusho izinkinga. Ucansi yilokho okukuhlanganisayo njengezithandani futhi kungenye yezinto enabelana ngazo kuphela. Kubangela ukuthi ubuchopho bukhiqize i-oxytocin, kuqede ukucindezeleka, futhi kwehlise imigoqo yokwethembana ebekwe ubuchopho.
9. Awusazinakekeli
Lapho abalingani bebhekene nesikhathi esinzima bavame ukuyeka ukuzinakekela. Lokhu kungasho ukuthi uyeke ukufa izinwele zakho, ukusebenza, ukugqoka. Uma ungakawashintshi amaphijama akho ezinsukwini ezintathu nakanjani uhlangabezana nokuwa.
10. Uqala ukwethula iziphazamiso ukucasha ngezinkinga zakho
Lapho beya emshadweni onezinkinga, abantu abaningi baqala ukufuna izixazululo ze- "Band-Aid" zokufihla izindaba zangempela ezenzeka ebudlelwaneni. Imibhangqwana ingenisa umbono weholide lasendle, noma ivule nengxoxo yokuba nezingane.
Ezinye izimpawu ezisobala zesixwayiso
Udlame lwasekhaya nokuhlukumezeka emoyeni kuyizimpawu ezimbili eziyingozi zokuthi ubudlelwano bakho busenkingeni. Uma uhlukunyezwa ngumuntu oshade naye, funa indawo yokuhlala ephephile ozohlala kuyona ngenkathi uhlela ukwehlukana kwakho noma uqala ukwelulekwa ngokomqondo.
Uma ubona esisodwa noma eziningi zalezi zimpawu zomshado onenkinga, ungakhathazeki. Babizwa ngokuthi "izimpawu zokuxwayisa" ngesizathu. Kuphela lapho uvuma izinkinga emshadweni wakho lapho ungathatha khona izinyathelo ukulungisa isimo.